I bit my lip, running my fingers through my hair. Fuck, I need a drink. There was nothing to do in this God forsaken place.
Hell. No need to beat around the bush; this was Hell and I had earned my ticket a long time ago.
"Manchester, England, across the Atlantic Sea," I hummed the lyrics out loud as I leaned against the tree. It was a silly song, from an equally silly musical that I had the pleasure of watching as (a much too young) child. "I'm a genius- genius. I believe in God. I believe that God believes in Claude, that's me." Yeah, I wish. At this point, dying in the Vietnam war would be like Disneyland, every birthday party and losing my virginity all rolled into one.
"David?" A familiar voice, called to me; a sensual, Latina accent with the tough-as-nails spirit of a New Jersey native.
"Hello, Ms. Romero."
Jane Romero was a unique woman; a tall powerful beauty, she was a former actress, television host, and daughter of a major star.
I had been standing by the tree line, trying to get in a moment of silence when suddenly she appeared. Not that I minded.
"You okay, David? I was looking for you by the bonfire."
"Oh, sorry. I must have been asleep on my feet.: I turned and shook her hand. "Always glad to see a friendly face." The last thing I remembered from my mortal life, was driving off into the darkness, nothingness, and then awakening in Hell. That was the thing we bonded over; Jane had also driven off the road. Only Jane didn't believe we were actually dead.
"I get it, there's not a lot to do here." The professional influencer stood around in her suit and heels; it was the clothes she had 'gone missing' in, the uniform of her previous life. Jane flinched, blinking her eyes, as she crossed her arms.
"You feeling a chill, luv?" It was clear to me she was on edge; something bad was coming, most likely another trial.
"I guess so," her voice betrayed a sense of exhaustion. "Nothing we can't handle." She forced a chuckle. "Because whoever's holding us here wants to keep us alive."
"Hey," I said, placing a comforting hand on her arm. "You like asking questions, right?"
"What?" Jane blinked a single tear from her beautiful dark eyes. "I was a host, not a reporter," Jane replied. Her voice was annoyed but she ended her statement with a slight smile.
"Fair enough," I said, holding her hand. Her skin felt warm and soft; comforting like the holy mother, while radiating exotic sexuality. "Ask me a question, anything you ever wanted to know?"
"Anything?"
"Anything," I replied with a look of confidence. We had been trapped for so long, I felt like we already talked about everything there was to say. I was genuinely curious.
"So, tell me, why do you walk with a limp?"
I stand corrected. "I don't know what you mean." I hadn't walked with a noticeable limp since grade school. (At least I assumed I hadn't. My usual circle of friends would have kept that observation to themselves.)
"Fine, then. I guess I'll be going." Jane shrugged and turned away.
I was not about to release her hand. "I guess I've became used to the chronic pain and assumed the rest of my body would compensate."
That seemed to be enough to keep her attention. "How did it happen; bar fight, rugby match?"
I couldn't help but laugh at the stereotype. It would be like me asking her if she enjoyed margaritas and Taco Bell food. But as she spoke, she held both my hands, forcing me to look into her eyes. It was like a siren or a goddess staring directly at my soul. "I broke my leg when I was a boy, it never healed right."
Jane nodded, pursing her lips in deep contemplation. "Are you in pain?"
"That depends on your definition of pain." I hadn't been in pain for well over a decade, but the mention of it caused a burning sensation to emanate from my knee.
"Do you still think we're all dead?" Jane added as if trying to prove a point.
"I think it's my turn to ask you a question."
Jane laughed. "How about no."
"I just want to get to know you." I said in a coy whisper as I played with a lock of her hair. "Is that a crime?"
"For you, maybe." Jane moved in closer, hovering her lips close to mine. It was as if she was trying to decide if she wanted to take full advantage of the situation. "Then again, we're already in hell. Do your worst."
"Okay, let's see." I scratched my chin. I knew a little about her history. Did I want to ask something kind? (A question that might garner a smile or even a kiss.) Or something that might get me slapped in the face?
"Well, hurry up," she said with a giggle. "It's not like we have all day to just stand around."
As it turns out, I'm a bit of a masochist. "Tell me about your mum."
Jane scoffed. "Why?"
Now it was my turn to shrug. "No reason." But unlike her, I wasn't planning on walking away. "My old man beat me; when he was drunk, sober, tired, or frustrated. You might say I've already been to Hell."
"So?" she asked, with her hands on her hips.
I figured if she was actually pissed, she would have crossed her arms, or perhaps punched me in the face, so I continued. "I just wanted to learn about the history of your personal Hell."
Jane crossed her arms, pursed her lips, looking like a disappointed grade school teacher. And then she laughed. "Don't act like you don't already know. I mean really, the media was up my ass for the entire time. I think that was my Hell."
"The after math, but not the event?"
"The fact that a man from England knows about the most embarrassing moment of my life: yes, I can say with confidence, yes." Jane went silent. I could tell by her expression she was trying to be mad, but in doing so, she was forced to hold back laughter. The situation was all kinds of ridiculous.
I nodded, fully willing to reveal what I knew via the European tabloids. "After meeting your a-list celebrity mother for the first time in over a decade." I paused squinting my eyes in scrutiny. "No, it was much longer than that. You were pretty much dumped on your father to raise."
"I wouldn't say dumped." In her eyes there was a sense of longing. Her father had been more of a man then most.
"Of course not, your father was a good man. That's who you were driving to see when you disappeared and were never seen again?" I phrased it as a question, as opposed to a statement.
"You want to know about my mother?" Jane scoffed, blinking tears from her eyes. "I'd rather have a parent who beat me than an arrogant, narcissist who abandons their family, only to come out of hiding to humiliate their only child on national tv."
I nodded in agreement. "Too bad we don't get to choose." Jane clearly missed her father, perhaps it was her daddy issues that made her want to spend time slumming with a bloke like me. I was about to try my luck, when suddenly the lights went out. 'Bloody Hell. Here we go again.'
The next trial started the same as it always did. When I opened my eyes, I was in a cold, (formerly) sterile factory. I say 'formerly sterile' because of the many corpses (which did not change from round to round) littered the floor like haunted house decor.
I walked through the mental haze, trying to force myself to focus, or at least pick a direction to run. Or not. 'Why should I play our captor's game?' Not like any of this would end up on my tombstone; here lies David King- a hero who risked his life to make it to the exit door, vs here lies a lazy SOB who sat this round out. Now it was just a matter of where I could set up shop to run out the clock. I've always wondered about the roof; it didn't seem to be part of the gameboard, so perhaps it was neutral ground.
I knew there were no generators (the key points necessary to open the exit door.) God, those were annoying. Even with multiple people working on a single one it took bloody forever. This was because we were all sitting ducks for the monster of the day. Once the creature chases off all of the humans all they had to do was give the generator a good kick and we were back to square one. Yeah, fuck generators.
However, there were possibly hooks available for the monster to score points against the human players. Just a chance I had to take. Getting hooked didn't mean actual death, just a long, painful, escape back to the hub world. I mean, it still sucked; it wasn't a pleasant feeling, to get crucified on a sentient black (stone-like) tree.
I made my decision. I went straight to the fire exit, working my way up the floors, using my pent-up anger to open any locked doors in my path. After struggling with the first few I managed to pick up a crowbar-like weapon. I assumed it was planted as a part of a broken table. Soon I had reached my destination, and the view was worth it. The roof was neutral, nothingness; sitting out the round as a big fuck you to the entity that kept us here.