What does it mean to be loyal? For a virtue so vaulted and valued in every society, it's not a very well defined concept. Must one be unconditionally honest, holding not a secret to their name? Must one follow every order and whim with out hesitation? Or must one trust every word without question?
Is that what loyalty is? Candor, obedience, faith? To be the perfect soldier? To be the perfect slave? Or is it something more?
Maybe loyalty is more than compliance and belief, maybe loyalty is to dedicate yourself completely to the well being of someone other than yourself. To at all times hold their needs above your own, to be ready to do what ever it takes to protect that person when the time comes.
If so, then I had already failed. I had failed to protect my fiancée, my partner, my soul mate. The time came, and I fucked up. The unholy warlock powers that haunted my once mundane existence were irrefutable proof that I had let her down. I would have spent my entire lifetime trying to make up for that one mistake, but life doesn't give you a second chance.
Or does it? Cindy had been dead for almost a year, and I still missed her like it had been yesterday. But whether I liked it or not, there was a new woman in my life now, Melissa.
A mere month ago, she'd only been my strange and reclusive roommate with whom I wanted nothing to do with. Yet in the time I've lived here, I have been through more perilous situations with her than I'd hoped to go through in a lifetime, Through it all, we'd become physically intimate on a regular basis.
After Cindy, I'd been told time and time again that I had to move on, and some part of me wanted to do just that with Melissa. But another part of me was asking if that was really the right thing to do. How much did I really know about this woman? I knew that she was a witch and she killed people. I also knew she had a rocking ass and a killer pussy to match. But did I really know her?
She had told me I could develop my powers as a warlock by retrieving Cindy's Athame, a ceremonial spell dagger, but how did I know that she wasn't just using me to get her hands on my late fiancée's powers? What would Cindy have wanted me to do?
Even if I knew the answer to that question, I'm not sure if I would have been eager to honor it. Unbeknownst to me, Cindy had been a witch the whole time, just like Melissa. She kept that secret from me all those years. She lied.
As far as I knew, Melissa had never lied to me. She had many grievous faults, but at least she had been honest thus far. Right?
What does loyalty mean to me? To whom am I loyal? To whom should I be loyal?
To Melissa? Or to Cindy?
To the present, or to the past?
To the living, or to the dead?
These were the questions that had been plaguing me for the past two days, and I guess that's why I hadn't opened the file yet.
This and more was on my mind when I returned from work. Sure enough, my roommate was sitting on the couch watching re-runs and eating another bucket of fried chicken. I tried to enter quietly and slink back to my room without a confrontation, but she wasn't having any of that.
"Where the fuck have you been?" She demanded.
"I had to work late." I explained.
"The boss still holding your leash?" She chided. "That fat fuck needs to ease up that grip on your balls so I could get piece of them too." She added bitterly.
"Yeah, but it's late, I've had a long day and-" I began.
"Bullshit!" She bellowed, hucking a chicken thigh across the room at me. "You've been too tired for days! What does it take to get a good fucking around here?!" She pressed.
"I'm sorry Melissa, I'm a bit tired from work, and you'll have to excuse me for still being a bit sore after you crammed a spider down my peehole." I responded with a hint of my own bitterness.
"I saved our fucking lives David! And this is the thanks I get? Not even so much as a quicky?" She countered, standing up and closing in on me threateningly. I wasn't lying about my dick still being sore, it's not every day you have a proboscis unceremoniously plunged down your urethra. But truth be told, on any other day, you would have had to cut my dick off to keep me from sticking it inside that woman. Even as she stood there with chicken grease dribbling down her chin, wearing not a scrap of clothing over her stunning body, allowing her breasts to tremble angrily as she spoke, my roommate was still sex incarnate.
Normally, I was never not interested in what she had to offer, but right now I just wasn't sure how I felt.
"Look, I'm sorry Melissa." I averted my eyes. I'll be the first to admit that I've made some pretty stupid decisions in my life, but I'd seen what the bitch could do and I was smart enough not to push her. "I'll be ready to go again soon, I just need a little more time." I offered.
"You fucking better David." She seethed as she reached and grabbed me by the scalp. She was intimidating as fuck for someone barely more than half my height. She yanked my face away from the floor so she could look me in the eyes. "I don't need you David. Without your Athame, you're just as useless to me as any other man, and just as replaceable." The witch threatened.
"Then why haven't you?" I retorted, expecting her to use her magics, weapons, or monsters to tear me to pieces. She'd certainly killed people for less.
Despite that, she only sneered in disgust. "Fuck you David." She spat, tossing my head away furiously as she stormed off to her room and slammed the door.
I took a moment to catch my breath until she started loudly masturbating from her room. Sighing, I picked up the bruised chicken thigh, and tossed it into the corner where that strange creature who infested our building dwelt.
"Eat up Hank." I told him as those unblinking ocular growths all focused upon the greasy treat. A slithering tentacle crawled out and enveloped the breaded fowl meat, pulling it back into the corner where it subsumed the morsel into its wriggling sodden mass.
At least someone in the apartment didn't hate me. I took issue with only one member of the house, and for once it wasn't the oozing monster in the corner. Ironically, he was actually an ideal roommate. Super quiet, kept to himself, and would even help clean occasionally.
He'd been noticeably more animate lately, maybe because the living room wall had finally been repaired, and maybe because he had been getting plenty of nourishment from the fast food leftovers Melissa refused to pick up. I had been worried that his injuries would keep him indisposed for a longer period of time, but now that he had his old spot back, he was recovering nicely.
With a friendly nod to my strange companion, I retreated to my room and flopped down on the bed. I was just about to relax when I remembered that folder and groaned. Looking over at the dresser where it leered at me, I recollected how I'd come across the damn thing in the first place.
In our attempts to retrieve Cindy's Athame, Melissa and I found ourselves breaking into the police station back in my home town. While digging through the evidence locker, I stole a case file relating to the accident that had taken my fiancée's life. For reasons I did not fully understand, I had chosen not to reveal this file to Melissa.
Perhaps it was distrust, perhaps it was resentment for how she had treated me. A part of me wanted to take the folder to her, have a good laugh, and go back to the way things were. Another part of me wanted see what was inside of it without her. But to do so would be to admit that I couldn't trust her, and so it remained on the dresser as I vacillated on the implications of my decision.
I tried to tell myself that I could take a peak at the file before showing it to Melissa, that it wasn't already a betrayal for having kept the file from her this long in the first place, and that it wasn't too late to turn back. It might have stayed there forever if not for the upcoming meeting with Melissa's most deadly rival coming up this weekend. I needed to have my loyalties worked out before once again putting my life on the line for this woman, and I was running out of time.
Just as I was dwelling on this, the report was tossed off the dresser and across the floor in a cluttered pile. Through the gloom, I could see Hank's telltale tentacle slithering back into the wall. Perhaps he was trying to tell me to make up my mind already. Perhaps he was just sick of watching me glower at it every night. Either way, I knew what I had to do. I'd waited long enough.
Scooping up the pages, I straightened them out and sat down on the bed. Reluctantly opening the folder, I was immediately faced with the images of my truck's remains on the side of the road.
I'd spent so many years with that vehicle. It had taken us so many places both safely and reliably. I felt indestructible at the wheel. Yet there is was, bent and smoldering on the side of the road, a warped and corrupted shell of its former self, serving as a flaming coffin for what mattered most to me.
I closed the folder and sat there trying not to cry. My heart was pounding, this was not a part of my life I was ready to revisit, but I had no choice. Steeling myself, I opened the folder once more and skipped the cover photo.
Now I've never been one for paperwork, and I'm certainly no criminal investigator. But if I was reading this correctly, this was not an accident report, but a criminal investigation.
The executive summary began with the crash on April 13th, and described signs of arson found at the scene.
"Arson?" I mumbled in bewilderment, but kept reading.