"Not Kansas anymore, right?"
"Still wicked Witch in the West though." Granny told Detective Heather Choi upon entering her Victorian style mansion via an antique looking mirror with intertwining tree branches holding the looking glass. "Wanna tell me how you walked through a mirror into a barrier driven Coven meeting?"
"Went from Dorothy to Alice... instead of chasing white rabbits I chased white stuffed Kitty's from Japan... my boyfriend actually. I was right on his and Raven's tails when somehow I took a detour." She covers her privates being naked, no blush, merely courtesy. "Wouldn't have a cloak around I could borrow, would you?"
"Just a pointy hat." Granny chuckled, "Relax Kitten, I'm blind."
"Blind? Seriously?" Sighing Granny lifts her sunglasses and reveals empty sockets. "Ouch! Sorry about... wait a minute... Gwen said you drove a truck from the backwoods to Boston. How can you do that blind?"
"Birds eye view Kitten. I ever catch you chasin' my bird I'll send yer cute ass to Alpha Centauri."
"How do you know I have a cute ass? I could have a big fat one."
"To match the lip, I'll give ya?" She goes to a box on an old bureau and opens it. Removing something she cocks her head back and installs it like eyedrops. A second later she turns to face Heather with a glass eye installed. "Before ya ask... it's a crystal ball. Gives me images that require my attention. Sit pretty Miss Kitty."
Heather looks around the bedroom and starts to sit down on an old chair that looked made of bones. Wincing at the possibility they were real she chose to remain standing up.
"Old boyfriend back in my younger lays." Granny points a pinky at the chair, "Stole my heart, I stole his soul. Can't get rid of my stalker now. Still tries to goose me when I sit down on him. My favorite chair in the crib though." She chuckles then pauses Heather from replying. "Yep! You got the Coven puttin' on their Depends. Piss ants all of 'em."
"Why did they bow before me and refer to me as Goddess?"
"Because you stepped through the one mirror they fear most. The one that leads to Hell."
"What? Hell? I came through Hector Alonzo's bedroom mirror. Somehow it's a portal that shows everyone where to go and takes us there by crawling through it."
"First mistake... not everyone should be able to see through it, let alone travel into it. Only a true witch can conjure its abilities when she chooses it."
"Maybe Raven... I'm presuming a witch, I know a Succubus, but if you and your family are all Succubus, Succubae, whichever, are witches now..."
"Lucky ones us."
"Where's Jezzabel I want to punch her lights out."
"Lights you say?" She taps a nail on her glass eyeball, "Ah! Now I see, how did I miss that?"
"Miss what?"
"Angel tantrum. My granddaughter's lil' lover girl has a warrior Angelus inside her. It was tryin' to escape her prison."
"Jody said she had an angel, she presumed Raven's guardian angel."
"Guardian? If it was free without bein' on a leash it'd lop their heads off. My baby Succubus is one powerful youngster."
"I don't think she understands any of it."
"Course not! She's flyin' by the seat of her panties... when she wears any. Kids these days!"
"So how did she bind an angel to Jody... then Jody somehow binding another with her Mother Gwen?"
"Two angelus? Makes sense, I smelled two on the Mommy. I just thought she was preggers!"
"She is."
"HEY!" Granny taps her eyeball three times, "Stop holdin' out on me. Angels and bambinos?" She searches deeper again poising a bony knuckle at Heather. "Aiiiiiiyiiiiiiyaiii!"
"What are you seeing?"
"Martha Stewart passin' a joint to Snoop Dog!"
"Be serious!"
"I am! Guacamoldy dip sounds good! So does a pot brownie... the fairy kind. Good shit if he's been eatin' the right hag weed." She laughs. Heather shook her head. "Fine! Saw the cutie pie let her guard down a tad and her Angelus broke the mirror with her sword. Sword sucked back into the kid, the mirror reformed itself, eldritch energies brought on by my granddaughter's dark side. Fixed it right up."
"So... the mirror goes to Hell?"
"Probably why the Angelus tried to sever the portal."
"But with Raven the portals back."
"Ain't fixed with Gorilla goo."
"She's that... powerful?"
"Her mark is different than when we all wore it. We're still tryin' to figure it out. Looks to me like the mark is duelin' with the light... ever notice the word RAM is part of MARk written out of order?"
"Just like Ark is... I love word games. Mark of the Covenant? Noah's mARK?"
"I like you less and less." Granny winks the eyelid of her one empty socket. "COVEN in COVENant!" A razz of her tongue made Heather actually grin.
"Jezzie?" Heather changed her reaction, "I'm pissed off at her for doing this Familiar crap to me."
"My granddaughter's a lil' spontaneous. She saw you as somethin' her kid loved, so she bound you to her. Jezzie's makin' up for lost time and tryin' her way to know her kid. From what my ole' eyesore here says you told Jezzie you would watch out for her. Have her back... which meant have her mark of sorts."
"And that gave her the right to fuck me over?"
"Gotta learn to watch what you say around us Witches!"
"Well... the only positive thing I see in her tricking me is it allowed me to offer up some lives to save Keith Bryson."
"Offer up... you sacrificed lives for... a human?"
"Are you saying you don't know what I had to do? The voice directed me to save him like I did. I'm grateful for that much, but now he and I are both... wereleopards."
"See Spots run!" Granny hissed, "Voice ya say?" She utilizes her eye in going back to the morgue to unfold events. "You hadn't changed yet. Interesting!"
"Do you recognize the voice?"
"Can't hear any voice." She removes the eyeball and puts it to her ear like a hearing aid. Heather continued to shake her head. "Ah! That voice! I see now!"
"Goddammit!" Heather grumbled at Granny's insanity.
"Figure of speech! Quit whippin' your tail! I don't know the voice. In her debt she said. You're bound to Raven, so no debts owed to anyone else."
"Will my not paying up on any debt... take Keith from me again?"
"You gave up all but one life for him... worry more about your own. Kinda screwed your puss Defective!"
"Detective!"
"So says the hellcat that kicked over her Meow Mix. You had nine lives given to ya SANRIO. Rearrange those letters Kitten."
"What?" Heather winces, "Rearrange the letters in Sanrio? The makers of Hello Kitty?"
"I'm waitin'!"
Mulling over the letters in multiple arrangements she shrugs, "I don't know."
"Think of the letter O. Only clue I'm givin ya."
"O...? Just fucking tell me."