Harpy Valley Tanda

Luther Jackson listened to the river. Babble fucking babble, like a pile driver in his brain. That's the way it had been for the last forty minutes. However, he knew that if he kept walking along the river he would eventually find his way back to the campsite.

He couldn't believe he had let those motherfucking crackers talk him into going camping. He looked up at the redwoods towering over them. They should be skyscrapers. Luther Jackson didn't belong in no trees. Luther Jackson was an urban warrior, not some hillbilly Grizzly motherfucking Adams.

Those were his last thoughts before he heard the sounds of flapping leathery wings and felt the pain of the talons' grip on his shoulders as he was suddenly lifted into the air.

As Luther regained consciousness, he slowly opened his eyes. A pair of ice-cold green eyes with cat pupils returned his stare.

He took stock of his current situation. He was buck-naked in what looked like a giant bird's nest high atop a redwood. He was spreadeagled, his wrists and ankles tied by heavy vines that appeared to be woven into the very fabric of the nest.

The creature watching him sported the wings of a gigantic, human-sized bat and the body of a woman (built like a brick house, mighty mighty). She came complete with ample breasts (and all the other accouterments that Uncle John needs). Her abdomen was covered in fine down, like a puppy's tummy. He peered over her shoulder, damn fine booty too. Her legs were strong, if little on the scaly side. The heartache of psoriasis he supposed. They ended in talons rather than feet.

"Toto, I don't think we're in motherfucking Kansas anymore," Luther muttered under his breath. Suddenly the truth dawned on him. "Oh I get it," he said. "You Ashton Kutcher, ain't you? I been punked. Well, goddamn."

Three more of the bird ladies landed on the nest, perching in the four cardinal directions. "We are what your Greek philosophers called harpies," the first bird lady told him.

"Greek phi-what?" Luther asked.

"We are the last of our kind," said bird lady number 1. "We must mate with a human to produce a male, or else we are gone from this Earth."

Luther took another gander at those talons. Those things would not leave scratches on his back the way LaTanya's nails do; they would remove several of his most favorite organs on the first swipe.

"What about the Endangered Species Act?" he asked. "We can contact the Fish and Wildlife Service. "They will protect you. Find you some males. It's not like that asshole Bush is still in the White House. Things have changed," Luther said as he frantically pulled on the vines binding his wrists and ankles. They were far too strong for him to break.

"How little you know, you pathetic human," the first harpy replied. For the first time he noticed the three rows of teeth in her mouth, razor sharp needles, every last one of them. She rose to her full height (definitely WNBA material) and spread her leathery wings just like that pterodactyl in

Jurassic Park II

(or was it

III

?). "We must hide from the humans. They are our enemy and will hunt us down. They know nothing of our existence. OK, maybe we gave couple of exclusives to the

Weekly World News

, but who believes anything that is published in that rag."

"I must now get you ready for Ali'ya," the spokes-harpy announced, as she lowered her amply-toothed mouth to fluff him. "Now you will know what it is to make love to a harpy. Few humans survive such a mating."

"OK," said Luther, "bring it on. Let's see what you got"

She flicked out her Kiss-worthy tongue at his already tumescent organ, extracting a drop of pre-cum from its eye and sending an electric thrill throughout Luther's body. Then she lapped the front side of his cock from top to bottom with that long forked tongue, which was far raspier than a cat's. As she ran her tongue up and down his shaft, Luther strained against his bonds. The pleasure was indescribable. She began to swirl her tongue around and around his cock in a spiral pattern, each orbit producing a wave of intense pleasure beyond anything that Luther had ever experienced in his hitherto sheltered life in Watts. She grabbed his shaft in her strong wing talons and began to lick his balls, swirling her raspy tongue around each sphere, as she squeezed his cock with her strong claws, which began to slide up and down the length of his throbbing dick.

She lowered her head to take his cock in her mouth. Luther winced when her needle-like teeth penetrated the skin of his prick, her jaws gripping it like a vise. Those teeth then began to move up and down the length of his shaft, her raspy tongue licking its underside as her teeth began to move faster and faster up and down the length of his prick, sending intense waves of pleasure throughout what little there was left of Luther's mind. He was not fucking the harpy's mouth; it was fucking him. Luther did not know what was keeping him from coming right there and then.

"Now it's time to get really started," the spokes-harpy said, releasing his cock (with seeming reluctance). She straddled him and began to climb up his hard chest, licking and slurping every inch of him with her cat-like tongue. Her pendulous breasts with their supremely erect nipples brushed Luther's skin softly as she slowly made her way toward his head. He felt the trail of her wet cunt as it slid up his abdomen. She ran her lips over each of his nipples and teased him with talented tongue. She moved to his face, licking his ears and eyes. She ran her long feline tongue over Luther's lips, then forced it past his teeth, opening his mouth. She moved it against Luther's tongue and then rammed it down his throat, gagging him as she pressed her naked body against Luther's bare chest. Then she took his hair in her claws and slid her dripping cunt over his chin until it covered both his mouth and nose. It too sported rows of needle-like teeth along its inner walls. She began to ride him, sliding her cunt up and down his face, embedding Luther's nose, gripping it with her

vagina dentata

. Then, she slid down a little, forcing her clitoris into Luther's mouth. Eager to please his host, Luther lapped at it, sucked it, and ran his tongue in swirling patterns around it.

Then she moved her wet cunt back over Luther's mouth and nose, beginning to ride him, her walls and nether teeth forcing Luther's tongue inside her, where it was grabbed, squeezed and basically fucked by her all-too versatile cooz.

Then the harpy named Ali'ya mounted Luther's still rigid cock, the walls of her cunt grabbing it with their teeth. She began the ride in earnest, posting up and down on Luther's cock, her cunt teeth moving the skin up and down violently.

Harpies #3 and #4 each took one of Luther's balls in their talons, squeezing them and rotating them even as Ali'ya's cunt brutally fucked Luther's organ as it had never been fucked before.

The spokes-harpy fingered her clit, as she continued to slide her wet cunt up and down Luther's mouth and nose at a faster and faster pace. Finally, she came, pouring hot fluid into Luther's mouth and nose and all over his face. The fluid began to move as if it were alive, seeking out and crawling into Luther's nostrils and down then his throat.

Ali'ya continued to bounce frantically on Luther's cock as her two sisters kept on squeezing and rotating his balls. Finally, she came, her cunt teeth holding Luther deeply inside her as he too came, pouring a torrent of seed into her all-too-willing flesh. Then, he felt something entering the eye of his cock, then forcing its way down its passage and expelling a stream of burning fluid straight into his balls.

"OK, you can untie me now," Luther said, after they had all had a chance to catch their breath.

"We must first wait until the male harpy is born," said Ali'ya.

"Well, you don't need me for that," Luther said. "Being as how I am one of the few humans capable of surviving harpy sex, we could easily get together again if the baby croaks. What do you say?"

"You haven't survived harpy sex yet, human," the spokes-harpy said. "We may have neglected to mention just one little detail. Ali'ya will not be the one giving birth to the male, you will."

"Me?" Luther compiled a quick inventory of all his orifices. None seemed quite adequate to the task of delivering a harpy baby.

"How long do I have?" he asked the spokes-harpy.

She looked at him with those piercing cat eyes and replied, "The term of a harpy pregnancy is nine..."

"Nine months, just like in humans?"

"...minutes," she said.

A good three minutes had already passed since Luther shot his wad into Ali'ya.

He began to feel a swelling in his abdomen. His stomach began to pulse, and he could see strange ridges of motion up and down his torso. This is going to be just like that motherfucker in

Alien

, Luther thought, only it's going to be a fucking pterodactyl jumping out of my tummy. Elizabeth, I'm coming join you, honey, with a flying dinosaur as my head ornament.

He began to feel the pain in his upper chest, then up and down his legs. He could see rippling motions in both appendages. Then it entered his brain. His skull expanded in a futile attempt to ward off the imminent explosion. His face bones started to move and the pain entered his hands and feet.

His arms burst open and a leathery mass emerged from each of them. His teeth started to throb and move. He felt stronger now. Much stronger. He pulled on the vines holding his wrists. They broke easily. He kicked at the vines holding his legs; they too broke easily. Then he slowly stood and spread his wings. He must be close to seven feet tall now he thought. Watch out, Shaq.

"Welcome Lu'ter," the four harpies chanted in unison.

He felt a sudden throbbing and looked down at his new member. It was at least 14 inches long and twice as thick as its predecessor. It also sported barbs that moved and pulsated, sending waves of erotic delight into what was left of Lu'ter's brain with each throb.

He looked at his four captors with steely cat eyes. "OK, which of you bitches wants to go first?" he asked.

*An homage to Harper Valley PTA

for those readers too young to remember the television show of that name. Other possibly dated references include music by the Commodores and Little Richard, the TV show

Sanford and Son,

the defunct tabloid

, The Weekly World News

, and quite possibly Shaquille O'Neal.