Hallon Seed Day 03 04

Julia was brought out of sleep by something moving her arm. The room was pitch black, and it took her a moment to remember where she was, and with whom. She rolled onto her right side and found the body of the demon laying in the same position, but now it occasionally twitched lightly, and Julia heard faint sounds of discomfort.

It seemed that the demon has having a tumultuous dream. Julia drew closer and gently stroked the bare arm while quietly shushing.

"It's okay," Julia whispered. After a short while, the demon was still and quiet. Julia looked in the direction of the open door. If the sun were up at all, then there would be at least some noticeable ambient light, but she saw nothing.

She did not feel Mark against her, but she found his body as well. Not wanting to disturb him, she rested her head again and closed her eyes to sleep.

She was awakened a second time by a movement against her arm, but this time it was the gentle touch of Mark's fingertips gliding up and down the length of her left arm. She turned over to face him, though she could not see much more than a portion of the silhouette of his head. She noticed that the sun had risen.

She found his cheek, using it as a point of reference to help her find his lips.

"Good morning," he said sweetly. Quietly. She smiled, even though she knew he could not see her do so.

"It is," she replied, hoping her smile would be translated. She gave him a longer kiss, and he wrapped an arm around her. The sense of safety that engulfed her was one that she'd never felt with anyone else.

His hand moved up and down, melting her into comfort. It moved down further past the bunched up hem of her shirt, and then back up across her bare skin, setting her alight. She shifted her thighs against the swelling of her sex and moaned into his mouth. When she parted her lips to breath, his tongue sought out her own, and she welcomed it. His hand moved down again, over her hip and onto her thigh, where it lingered.

It lingered like a small torture, so she moved that leg back until his hand fell like a feather onto her inner thigh. She was electric, and he was dangerously close to an area of increasing wetness. Her body begged to be discharged, but her mind fought her.

It was the same as all the other times. Something unseen made her reject him. When his hand moved nearer, she let out a whine, and grabbed his fingers, holding them firmly. She felt terrible.

"I'm sorry," she breathed into him. Guilt threatened to bring her to tears, but she was only just spared by his words.

"It's okay." He brought her fingers to his lips and gave them a forgiving kiss. "It's alright. I don't want to until you're ready." He kissed her lips once and then held her close. She pressed her forehead to his chest, thankful for the dark to hide the tear that escaped.

They lay there a while, and the sunlight invaded further, until the room was no longer a sanctuary of darkness.

"You want breakfast," Mark asked.

"No," she replied. She felt like she should have said more, but nothing that came to mind felt appropriate at the moment.

"Okay. If you need me, I'll most likely be in the study, reading. Just let me know." He gave her a kiss on the head and then got up an left her there.

"I need you," she whispered as she watched him disappear through the door.

She rolled onto her back and stared at the dim ceiling. After some minutes, the demon rolled over and laid its head on Julia's shoulder. Julia found the clink of the chains somewhat jarring.

"He deserves better," Julia said. "I love him. I want to be with him in... every conceivable way, but something won't let me. I feel like I'm being selfish, which is exactly what I'm trying to avoid. I've made so many bad choices, that I'm not sure if I would know a right one if it presented itself."

"There are no selfless choices," the demon said, calmly as ever.

"What," Julia asked, confused. "What do you mean?"

"You may make a decision with another person in mind, but in the end, the decision is made to satisfy a desire within yourself. Selflessness is a fool's dream."

Julia wanted to object, but she found that she had nothing to say.

"Selfishly pursue your joy. Do what makes you happy," the demon added.

"It doesn't seem right," Julia contended. "I don't want to be someone who doesn't think of others."

"If helping others is what brings you joy, then pursue it selfishly. You choose your joy."

"I don't feel like that has been the case," Julia confessed. "I feel like I've spent half of my life choosing misery."

"You do nothing that you do not feel benefits you in some way. If misery was your choice, then you felt that you benefited from it. Perhaps, instead, misery was simply circumstantial. What good did you get from those past relationships?"

"Good," she breathed out in a laugh. She had no idea what the answer to that question would be. "Attention? Some illusion of security? ... Avoiding loneliness? Maybe I felt I didn't deserve better."

"Deserving is irrelevant."

"What do you mean?" Julia's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"It is an uncertain word. Truth is your greatest ally. Uncertain words do not help you. Humans concern themselves with uncertainty when certainty is unpleasant. Deserve. Fair. Should. These are abstract things. They are illusions. They do not truly exist. Disregard them."

"I'm not sure how I would go about doing that," Julia said. The demon was quiet for a moment.

"Ask me what you should do."

"I thought I was supposed to disre..." Julia stopped, realizing that observation would lead nowhere. "What should I do?"

"Ask me the same question without resorting to the word, should."

Julia thought a moment. "What... decision is the one I shou.... Which decision will yield the desired result?"

"Cause and effect," The demon said. "What do you want?"

"To be happy with Mark."

"What stands in the way?"

Julia thought of numerous excuses, but in the end, she knew the answer.

"I stand in the way. I think I don't deserve him."

"Without using the word, deserve."

Julia thought. "I am afraid... I will... disappoint him."

"In what way?"

Julia searched herself, finding nothing.

"With everything he knows about you, and you him, and considering how he feels, what might you do that would disappoint him," the demon asked.

"I... I don't know."

"I will ask a different way. If the desired effect was to disappoint him, what cause would you most likely employ?"

What an awful question, Julia thought. She had half a mind to ignore it, but then realized that ignoring things was a part of why she was miserable.

Mark wanted to be with her from the beginning. She rejected him. He waited for her to come to her senses. He waited for her to find her strength. In his own subtle ways, he guided her toward it.

"I would continue doing exactly what I've been doing. I would stay weak... and continue rejecting him." Her eyes welled with tears. "That would be the only way." She sniffed and wiped away tears.

Julia maneuvered her right arm under the demon, and pulled it closer in a hug. She let out a little laugh of joy in her revelation. Her left hand held the back of the demon's head, and she kissed it in gratitude, her cheek grazing one of the smooth, boney horns. She smiled and ran her thumb over it.

"I really like your little horns," Julia said.

"Thank you," the demon replied, then Julia breathed out a laugh at the irony of the demon thanking her for something so small, after what it had just done for her.

"I'm gonna check on Mark," Julia said throwing the covers off. She felt the pressure of her full bladder as she started to get up. "After I pee," she added.

Upstairs, she slipped her shoes on to go outside, and took them back off inside, taking notice of how much more comfortable she felt in the house. She went to the study and found Mark sitting in a large, cushioned chair, reading. The sight of him brought a smile to her face.

He looked up to see her. "Hey," he said. "You're looking... better."

She walked around behind him, wrapped her arms around his neck, kissed his cheek and rested her chin on his shoulder.

"I'm better," she said casually. "Learn anything?"

"I started with the basics, so it's mostly stuff you've seen in horror movies. Things like the power of a demon's name. If you say the name, then you can summon it, and it gives the demon more power over you."

"Not really a concern for us," she noted.

"Hm." His response seemed half agreement and half doubt. "There is a lot of information here, but I haven't found anything terribly useful, yet."

"You want me to bring you some food?"

"Yeah. That'd be great. Thanks."

"Sure thing," she said. She kissed him on the cheek and returned to the kitchen.

She put wood in the stove and lit it, put water, left over from yesterday, in the medium sized pot to warm, and looked in the provisions box for something to prepare. She decided to go ahead and make a dent in the Mac and Cheese supply.

She read the instructions, and when the water was warm, she prepared two pouches. Something felt strangely new about what she was doing. Not the fact of where she was or that she'd never prepared and MRE, but something... less obvious.

She held the open pouches between the fingers of one hand, held water bottles in the other, and as she started back toward to study, the feeling increased. As she approached the door to the study, she realized that this was the first time that she'd ever prepared a meal for Mark.

She had prepared many meals for her asshole ex-boyfriends, but never Mark. She was a little disappointed that her first one was this sub-standard stuff, but perhaps it was appropriate on some level. Any of those assholes would have scoffed at being handed such a thing to eat, but Mark would be grateful.

She watched his face as she drew closer. He looked up to see that she had food, he closed the book he was reading, and he smiled.

"Sweet. What's food, today," he said with a hint of excitement. She chose to remain silent and just hand him the pouch. He looked inside. "Mac and Cheese. Haven't had that in ages," he said, digging in.

"The breakfast of... fat champions," she joked, hiding her appreciation of him. He laughed. She turned to leave.

"Not eating with me," he asked. She stopped and turned back to answer.

"No. I don't want to distract you."

"You wo... It won't bother me," he said.

She could tell he was about to say that she wouldn't distract him, but he didn't. He knew it wasn't true. She would have counted it as a polite gesture, but to him it would have been a lie, so he didn't say it.

She wanted to talk to the demon some more, but now her reason for leaving the room was to keep from breaking into tears again.

"I'll check in on you later," she said turning back toward the door.

"Okay. Thanks."

"Absolutely." Beyond the door frame, she took a deep breath to collect herself and headed back to the basement.

Noting the darkness, she realized that she hand left the demon in the unlit room.

"Shit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to leave you in the dark." She set her food down long enough to use a match to re-ignite the fire.

The demon said nothing. It sat up and scooted back against the wall, in anticipation of Julia soon doing the same.

"How ya doin'," Julia asked, lowering herself into position. The demon opened its mouth to speak, but Julia interrupted. "Nevermind. Stupid question." The demon silently closed its mouth, just staring forward.

"What would happen if you ate some of this?" The demon did not immediately answer. "I mean, I understand that your body is not strictly a human body, but do you have internal organs?"

Julia adjusted her position and bent over, pressing her ear to the demon's chest. To her surprise, she heard a rhythmic lub-dub. She sat back up.

"You have a heartbeat. You bleed. You probably have a stomach and intestines, right?"

"It seems to be a reasonable assertion," the demon said after a pause.

Julia held a spoonful of Mac and Cheese in front of the demon's mouth. The demon stared at it, contemplatively, then opened its mouth, took the bite, and began chewing.

Almost immediately, it held up its palm and calmly expelled the food, the sight of which made Julia giggle.

"I believe this body was designed for me to appreciate the taste of only seed."

When Julia realized that they had nothing to put the food in, she ran up to the kitchen and returned with the garbage bag. She held it open and the demon turned over its hand, dumping the small pile. The demon spit numerous times to clear the rest from its mouth. Some gooey cheese remained on the demon's palm, and Julia realized that she had nothing with which to wipe it off.

"I think we left the paper towels in the jeep. Here...." Julia took the demon's hand a licked it clean, willing to tolerate a little of someone else's saliva for the sake of convenience.

Julia froze with the unexpected taste that accompanied the cheese flavor. It was sweet. Familiar. She titled up the demon's chin, with the edge of her index finger, and turned it in her direction.

"Open up," Julia said, curious. The demon opened its mouth and Julia looked inside.

There was no uvula or tonsils. Presumably because the demon was making an effort at keeping its mouth open, its throat and the roof of its mouth randomly expanded and contracted. One moment, it looked like an otherwise normal mouth, and another, the walls were thicker. Softer looking. Familiar.

"Oh, my god." It suddenly hit her. "Your mouth is a vagina." She inserted her finger and ran it over the demon's tongue, wetting her finger. The fluid felt slightly more viscous than saliva. Julia put the finger in her own mouth and tasted it. "Your mouth... is a fucking vagina."

The demon closed its mouth when Julia went back to her food.

"I want to be horrified by that, but... I mean, knowing why, and all, but that's just so fucking cool." She took a spoonful, and halfway through chewing it she added, "And I thought I gave great head."

After a few more bites, Julia spoke again.

"So, how do you feel about sex?" She immediately realized that she would be better served to be more specific. "Did how you were treated... make you... disgusted by the prospect of having it?"

The demon thought a moment. "No. It probably would have, over time. It would be a terrible psychological torture to experience physical pleasure in an act that I despise. It would have instilled self-loathing, more easily turning me toward a desire to hurt others."

Julia shook her head, finishing the last of her food. "That's fucked up." She put her trash in the bag and stood up, "I'm gonna brush my teeth and check on Mark, again." She started to walk away with the bag in hand, but she paused. "Are you bored?"

"No," the demon replied, flatly.

After a moment, Julia walked away. After brushing her teeth, she went back into the study to, at the very least, collect Mark's empty MRE pouch.

"I know it's been only, like, forty-five minutes, but anything useful?"

"Actually, yes," he said, sitting up from his lounging position in the chair. She sat down on his lap and leaned against him. "After I got some food in me, I started thinking about everything from a different angle. Look at the mechanics of the curse. Why not just cast a spell, or whatever, that binds the demon inside the area of the basement, or just the house in general, along with the indestructability?"

"Why make things more complicated, and limiting, from Phillip's point of view, by attaching the demon to a wall? And then there's erasing the demon's name from its memory. Now, I don't think the demon is able to leave the body on its own. Maybe the knowledge of how to do that was erased as well, but what if one of the immutable laws of the universe is that when as demon is summoned, it has to appear?"

"What if the loophole, in all of this, is to summon it to someplace other that where it is, and nothing can stop it from being pulled there? The only missing ingredient is the name."

"Wow," Julia said, casually. "Yay, Mac and Cheese."

"Yay, Mac and Cheese," Mark said through a laugh.

"You wanna take a break," Julia asked.

"I kind do, yeah. Haven't brushed my teeth yet." He leaned closer to her ear. "Could make use of a hole in the ground," in a jokingly quieter tone. She smiled.

"Okay," she said, standing up. She collected his trash. "Come downstairs when you're done, 'kay?"

"Okay." He set the book down, stood up and stretched.

He exited the study as she was putting the empty pouch in the trash. She glanced over and watched him head outside to brush his teeth. He was in view the entire time, and she found herself just watching him. When he finished, she pushed herself up onto the counter and sat there, ankles crossed and fingers curled over the edge.

Before he would see her, she pulled the hem of her nightshirt out from under her butt, to give him a little more thigh to look at as he walked by. Her panties were no barrier against the cool of the marble countertop. She pulsed, and the contrast in temperatures became more apparent.

He definitely noticed her thigh, as well as her looking up and down his bare chest. They exchanged only flirtatious smiles, as he passed by. He slipped on his shoes and exited the back door, leaving it open.

When he was halfway across the expanse, she hopped down and stood in the middle of the kitchen, lifted the hem of her shirt, pushed down her panties, and let them fall to the floor. She stepped out of them and went downstairs.

"You hungry," Julia asked, smiling. She sat down next to the demon and began casually stroking herself in anticipation.

"Yes."

"Won't be too long." Julia closed her eyes and tilted her head back, focusing more on the feel of her fingers. "Did you ever masturbate while you were down here in the dark?"

"No."

"Hm. I imagine I would have been doing a lot of that," Julia shared.

"The pain of hunger was overwhelming."

"Right. Sorry." Julia was only half paying attention. In addition to warming herself up for Mark, she was also listening for the kitchen door to close. Everything was quiet for a time, and then she heard the barely audible signal. "Here he comes."

She got up onto her toes, reacquiring the position in which Mark had found her, the night before, when she was looking in her duffle bag. She faced away from the stairs, circumstantially facing the demon, peeled off her shirt and set it aside, just out of the way. Since her hair was dry, her upper back was not exposed, so she pulled her hair over one shoulder.

She listened, soon hearing the quiet rustling of Mark's feet on the synthetic material of the sleeping bag. Her dangling panties appeared in her peripheral and then dropped on top of her discarded shirt.

She closed her eyes and waited. Suddenly something soft and warm touched just below the back of her neck, sending a tingling sensation over her skin. She quietly gasped. Goosebumps rose and fell, unable to persist through the warm flush of her face and chest.

The softness began to slide down her spine. She arched backward with the sensation. It moved over her tailbone, and then it was her appendage tracing him. She anticipated his fingers, and then they were there, tickling her pubic hair and teasing the edge of her slightly parted lips. The tiniest of moans escaped her.

His touch send waves through her, and the muscles of her abdomen fluttered with her breath. This time, she did not stop him. Another hand slid under her arm and around, taking her breast. His pinching and rolling shot through her, as if trying to connect the fingers of his two hands.

The moment he touched her clit, she lost all sense of balance, falling back into him. She instinctively grabbed the arm around her, and he held her securely, stroking her up and down at first, dipping into her just far enough to spread her wetness. Circular motions elevated her further. Faster.