Facing Fears In Nightmares

It was mid October and things were going well as usual with the Braxton's except that Trish had been having trouble sleeping so her doctor prescribed her some medications.

With all the medications she is on the doctor was careful but none were going to be a guarantee and no one knew what the side effects may be.

Due to her high tolerance they couldn't give her a set amount of the medication. They wanted her to take a ½ and if that didn't work to put her to sleep add a half each night until she reached two tablets.

The half didn't work, she stayed awake. 1 pill didn't work, neither did the 1 ½. Chris suggested she do some things to relax her and then take the two pills at bedtime and to really try to fall asleep.

The problem was she was in a drastic Mania state so she not only wasn't sleeping she was scrubbing everything and fighting irritability.

He praised her on the fact that she wasn't being snappy and that she had things so clean. She would go and take quiet time in the dungeon if she felt like she was getting "stressed."

It had been two weeks now and she hasn't had but a handful of hours of sleep and Chris was really beginning to worry about her.

He pampered her and he and the kids did as much as they could to pitch in because they didn't want her wearing herself down even though she didn't "feel it."

After dinner the kids were doing homework and settling in for the night and Chris locked things up because he wanted to go their bedroom and work on relaxing Trish so maybe tonight she would be able to get some sleep.

Trish was sitting in her comfy chair by their bed reading when Chris came in. She stood up and he told her she could sit back down and he walked over and sat on the bed next to her.

She smiled loving him so much and she can tell he is worrying about her sleeping this night.

He hadn't done any serious scene or working over fun in the dungeon since this non sleep Mania episode because like with the housework he was afraid he would wear her body down.

"precious, I'd like for us to work on getting you relaxed and as stress free as possible to see if we can get you some well needed sleep."

"Yes Sir"

She marked her place and closed her book and set it on the end table by the bed.

She came and stood in front of him when he put his hands out to her. He wrapped his arms around her and she leaned in and they kissed.

"Mmmm my sweet precious lips. I love you so much precious."

"I love you too Master"

He ran his hands up the inside of the back of her shirt and as they kissed he unhooked her bra and then broke the kiss long enough to slip both shirt and bra off of her.

She leaned closer as he ran his hands up her back and sides and then down to her hips and unzipped her skorts and started sliding them down. She stepped out of them.

He broke the kiss again and pulled her sideways onto his lap. He caressed her back and moved her hair aside as he talked to her.

"How about a nice warm bubble bath and a massage precious?"

"You don't have to do that Master."

"I'd love to, let's go do that now and see if we can get you some rest."

"Yes Sir"

She slipped off his lap and was heading to the bathroom when he hooked his finger in her thong and slipped it down. She giggled. He walked with her to the bathroom and caressed her butt as he did.

He started the water and added the bubbles and helped her into the tub.

She smiled as she watched him begin to undress. She thought when he took his shirt off he was only doing it so as to not wet his sleeves. Then he took off his pants, well he does that sometimes too and bathes her in his boxers. Then those came off and he climbed in behind her.

"Mmm what a treat Master, I had no idea you were going to join me"

"I wouldn't miss sitting close to you naked and wet and full access to touch and feel you" *evil grin*

He turned the sprayer on and began rinsing her hair and wetting her down. Then he reached for a soft scroungie and added some of their favorite silky liquid soap.

She loved it when he bathed her. Touching her on every inch of her body and his little moans he lets out as he is caressing her with the soap.

He seems to really like to wash her hair and watch her as the water from the sprayer rolls down her hair and skin.

After they both took a bath he got out first and brought both robes and towels with an extra for her hair. He dried her hair, helped her up then patted her gently dry and instead of putting on her robe he wrapped a large towel around her and did the same to himself and they walked to their bed.

He of course grabbed the brush to brush her hair.

He went to her bedside after getting her hair brushed and got her medications and made sure to get 2 of the new pills. He gave her some water from the vanity and she took her medicine.

"Thank You Master"

"Your Welcome precious, now let's get you over there in bed under the covers"

She got up and as she got to her side of the bed her took her towel off and she climbed in bed and he covered her up.

He leaned down and kissed her gently then sat on the bed next to her.

"I need to go print a couple of things for work in the morning and finish up only a few things, you can read your book but do not get out of bed and I would rather you try really hard and dose off to sleep. I will be right in and will snuggle up behind you.

I really hope you begin to get some sleep and get to feeling more yourself; the guys at work are talking about having a Halloween party. I know you do not normally "celebrate" Halloween but Wesley wants to even have a haunted house.

You know Wesley he has always liked the bizarre. We do not have to go if you do not want but it might be something we would enjoy. You try for that sleep now and we will talk about it more tomorrow."

She smiled. "Ok Master, I will try to rest and I will think about the Wesley Halloween stuff. The last time I was in a haunted house other then a ride in an amusement park was when I was about 8 years old and I swore to never go back in one again.

It was at my aunt and uncles house and they had one every year I'm told. The particular year I went in I was wearing a dress with a tan slip and got scared by something, I do not even remember what but when I ran out my slip was missing.

They even took the thing down and they never found it. It's Weird. I know I have you and you would not let anything happen to me."

"You are right precious; I will never let anything happen to you. Now you rest."

He kissed her again then he placed his robe on and went to the office leaving their bedroom door ajar. She tried snuggling to his pillow and waited and no sleep came. Then she turned over and grabbed her book and again snuggled to his pillow. Within about 15 minutes she had drifted off.

Little did Chris understand but her going to sleep under these medications after not much sleep and her having paranoia this medication can not only not work but can intensify some things.

All medications have side effects but not on any pamphlets, on the net or even the Dr didn't tell her or Chris that it could cause..... Nightmares.

Unaware that Trish had even drifted off to sleep Chris remained in the room right next to her in the office completing some work. The medicine did their part they put her to sleep but sadly it also has that severe side effect that Chris was not aware of.

The nightmares began. It came in waves and seems to be as though it started from when she was younger and worked its way up to current day and time.

It was vivid color as if it were happening right then. Her step brother coming in her room to do the most awful things to her he had promised to do to her earlier that day. No matter what she did he always got around it.

He tormented her with the bad things he says and in this dream she is trying to hide. First she tried pushing the mattress away from the box spring a little bit then covering herself with the stuffed dolls, he still found her.

Next she heard everyone going to bed and she knew it wouldn't be long he would be coming back. He would be holding his hand over her face as he was stealing her innocence from her. Whispering how he could have her anytime he wanted to and that no one cared.

She had taken pride in saving herself until married even though friends joked about her being 19 and a virgin. If only they knew about the step brother. The tears just steamed down her cheeks.

The last thing she sees is her under a closet shelf that is close to the floor trying her best to hide once again. She is crying but trying to be very quiet as she is all bent up holding onto her knees and slightly rocking ever so scared.

Then as if in a flash it is a year later and her step father is throwing her against the wall and the same step brother who not long ago was abusing her was telling that she had been caught by a few people in the neighborhood having sex in the woods with her boyfriend.

It was the defending herself that got her against the wall. He considered it talking back. She will never forget the smug look on the step brother's face. Even though he is married, grown and out of he house now he tormented her and controlled her.

Next scene she is in her last house with her first husband he is screaming at her of the infidelity he suspects but isn't true. He is accusing her of sleeping and having an affair with her real father she had only met a few months before then.

Her real father had raped her and had taken advantage of her feelings of missing him so much and trying so hard to recapture all the love she lost over the years. She couldn't tell her husband he had abused her he would never believe her.

So he was demanding that if she wasn't sleeping around then she would have sex with him right then. She didn't want to. She had been feeling so dirty and confused. He pushed her around and made her fall onto the bed and raised her dress and took her right then as she cried and conceived their 5th child.

Her cries of the husband having his way with her turned to screams. Now she is with the second husband. He also is accusing her of infidelity.

Why is it they all treat me this way she thought and cried?

He pulled his knife out and got really close to her and told her he would make sure she was never with anyone else ever again. She was terrified because he had been in jail only a few years before that for stabbing his girlfriend. She didn't know that when they married and the girl lived and she figured he would never do that to her.

Next thing she sees is her in her car trying to get away from him as he threatens to slash her tires. She gets her children from school crying and drives from Alabama to Louisiana without stopping.

She tried living with her parents and he would call and tell her he is coming to kill her. She walked outside to check the mail and she seen him riding in front of the house smiling at her as if to say "I told you so... Run!"

Chris is still in the office and though she is asleep her heart is racing and her breathing is erratic. If he were to look in on her he could tell there was definitely something wrong.

Same husband but more then 2 years later he had been in jail but found her when he got out. He came drunk and strung out and wanting to argue one minute and wanting to make up the next.

She tried keeping him from the kids and keep him outside. They lived out in the woods. It was nearly half a mile up her drive way. No one would hear her scream but she thought she could handle it.

When he got loud her older kids who were visiting ran to the window, then he hit her. He slapped her hard across the face, her oldest daughter ran out and started hitting him then he was hitting her and pulling her hair. She begged them especially her to stay inside when he was there. This was why. She can't protect all of them and herself all at once.

She doesn't know where they came from but her house and truck keys were in her hands. They have a long thick braided leather strap on it and when he wouldn't let go of her daughter's hair she began beating him with the keys over his head then suddenly through the screams and the fighting she felt it... it was blood running down her hand.

"Oh my God you busted my head!, he said. After touching his head he showed her the blood. She felt bad but he let go of her daughter.

They all ran to the truck and all but her oldest daughter was in. They were all crying screaming and scared. He tried jumping through the driver's window to get the keys to stop her.

She turned the wheel really hard and the daughter was having trouble getting in as Trish was swerving to get away from the husband. She hit him with the truck and messed up his ribs.

The daughter jumped in the back as the other siblings pulled her in. They raced with flashing lights to the church ministry building.

He was close behind. Trish crying, blood covered hands shaking, to get the door open. This is a mostly glass window building in the front but she never thought of that until after they were in and he was on the other side.

They were huddled up, He was there at the door begging to get in, blood running down his face. Pleading that he only wants help and he promises he won't hurt them anymore. She was just crying and they were holding her.

While she was shaking her head no to his request the next nightmare started.

It seemed like different people. People she didn't know but someone was following her. She was outside on a sidewalk somewhere, and then suddenly she is in her truck again.

He is in his tire truck, he is chasing her again. She is making dangerous "u" turns on the middle of country roads. Where are all of the police! Why doesn't anyone see this!

Now the vision fades and she is in her apartment. She let him in; he was so drunk she thought he would pass out. Then she figured she would get away from him for good.

She has medicine and he drinks, she crushed medicine and was going to feed it to him. He woke up... He knew what she was doing. He pins her to the wall lifting her off her feet.

Her youngest son (David) is stomping on his foot "Let my mother go!"

Her oldest went outside and begged neighbors to use a phone. No one wanted to get involved. The husband locked her out.

She was banging on the window, screaming "please someone help us please he is hurting my mom please."

Then she heard the radio in his truck and got in and talked on the dispatch radio "please someone help me my dad is hurting my mom"

Dispatch asked her where she was and sent people and the police to help.

Would she ever be rid of the fear of being stalked? The fear of where is he? The fear of every white tire truck...is it HIM!!? Even though they are many miles away.

Next scene is a cool breeze of a nice evening with a friend. They are at a train station. You can hear people talking and laughing and enjoying themselves waiting on the next train. Her friend crossed the street and for no reason at all Trish begins to panic.

Her heart is hurting her pulse is racing. Someone is behind her. Then he starts screaming. He isn't screaming at her he is banging on the machine that took his money when he was trying to get his ticket.

Trish in her panic took off across the tracks trying to get to her friend and fell just as a train was moving on the track. It wasn't the now ex-husband but the fears of what he did is still effecting her. This time it nearly killed her... again.

Now it's dark, she is in a maze of some sort. It is like an old dilapidated house where the windows are busted out. Someone's following her, she can't find her kids then she finds one but then she's running.

Now it is really bright where did they go? Who is this following her and why? Everything she ever wanted has been taken from her including her sanity.

She sees her hand. She has the wedding ring she has always wanted. There is a pretty engagement ring next to it on her finger. Oh no he is there again, it's a faceless man but he grabs her from behind and she can't get away she tries to scream and nothing is coming out. She is struggling trying to get away.

Where is everyone? What does he want? She hears her pet bird it's a parrot and he comes to attack the man and he stabs her bird. Then she sees the knife up close, he grabs her hand and chops her fingers with the rings on them off and grabs them both fingers and rings.

He releases her then she's grabbing her hand trying to stop the bleeding. She begins to scream this time it's heard, this time it is for real, Chris jolts out of the office.

He finds her hysterical holding her hand crying and shaking.

He immediately goes to her and holds her caresses her hair. He isn't sure she is even fully awake because she still isn't responding to him.

The kids come running. "Is mom ok??"

"Yes, it appears she finally fell asleep and she had nightmares"

She wasn't dressed but was fully covered with the blankets and Chris holding her. They both came and hugged her. Michelle started to cry and David hugged her. "Its ok sis mom is ok"

"I know she will be but I don't like when this happens."

Chris asked, "This has happened before?"

"oh yeah, she wouldn't sleep on purpose because either it was what she called "the Freddie effect" or she would dream things and they came true"

"Freddie effect? As in Friday the 13th?"

"Exactly"

"Well let me take care of mom you kids go back to bed ok?"

"Ok, come on sis you can sleep in my room tonight."

David put his arm around Michelle's neck and they walked to his room. She was still pretty emotional over their mom.

Chris laid Trish back down. "precious, can you hear me love?"

Trish laid there like she was in shock. She began to rock and whine. He cuddled behind her and held her. "Its ok baby, I'm here no one is ever going to hurt you again."

Chris got all teary eyed thinking of all the times he wishes he could have protected her. He just rocked her in his arms and said over and over "I love you baby, I'm here, no one is going to hurt you, come back to me baby."

After about three times him saying that she began to sniffle and stopped rocking accept what he was doing in holding her.

"precious?"

"Master, I do not want to sleep anymore" *sniffle*

"Oh its ok baby, we will get this fixed. I do not care if I have to find the best most expensive specialist there is, I will protect you baby.... always"

She turned over and snuggled close to his chest. She opened his robe so she could feel his bare skin and hear his heart beat.

"Master please never leave me or let me go"

"I'll never leave you precious, never. Do you want to talk about this baby?"

"It is stuff you already know I suppose just more intense I guess because it was like it was all of my life, everything bad, all at once. I call it "the Freddie effect"

"David told me."

She lifted up. "Oh no! he seen me like this?"

"Its ok baby you screamed out and we all came running."

"How long was I asleep? I screamed out?"

He looked over at the clock. "Only about 40 minutes and it is ok baby"

"Then it has gotten worse"

"What do you mean?"

"I never had so much in such a small amount of time before. It is usually like one thing per night I have one night mare. This was more like movie trailers of my whole life"

"Let me close our door baby"

He gets up, closes and locks the door, removes his robe then climbs back in bed next to her.

"Did you get to finish your work?"

"Yes everything is fine"

He looked her right in the eyes as he told her, "Trisha, I know awful things have happen to you, I know horrible things that only time will heal, but I promise you I will never leave you and we will walk through this one step at a time. Whatever it takes."