Yadda Yadda Yadda

"I don't usually strike up conversations with strange women in the neighborhood saloon, but there's a dress code here at the Silver Dollar, and I couldn't help noticing that you aren't wearing a bra."

"Hey; I'm not strange, I'm Beth. And, you're fresh!"

"No, I'm Joe. Joy Coyne. And, I was just admiring the cleavage exposed by that serendipitiously unfastened top button. Such a tantilizing temptation, to slide down those glorious slopes, and disappear for an eternity into that deep, dark crevasse."

"Blarney."

"Shows, eh? With the red hair and a name like Coyne, you couldn't tell? Anyhow, I apologize for being so forward. I'm really not like that."

"Yeah, I'll bet!"

"I noticed you've been watching the door for the last ten minutes. Waiting for someone?"

"My friend, Annie, was supposed to meet me here after work. She was going to introduce me to a guy."

"Annie Vogel?"

"You know her?"

"She drops by; two, three times a week, with her new boyfriend. Lovely gal. Pert, pretty, petite. Quick wit and a saucy retort for frisky customers. Why don't you give her a call?"

"I don't have her home number."

"I do, upstairs."

"Up-?"

"My office-slash-apartment. I own the Silver Dollar. Annie used to work here, when she was in college. Paid her tuition with tips. And earned it with her mind, not her other less evident, but equally outstanding talents. There I go again, telling tales out of school. Come along, then; bring your beer with."

"This is nice! You have a great view of the bay. I love the bridge, all lit up at night."

"Phone's on the desk, over there. Annie's in the Roladex."

"Dum de-dum dum; doo doo. Ring ring ring. Annie, Annie, Annie. Come, on, Gal; pick up. No answer. Dang! And I don't have her cell number."

"You smoke?"

"Cigarettes, or-"

"Or."

"Sometimes. But, I really should get back downstairs, in case Annie shows up."

"I'll call down to the bartender, tell him to give us a shout if she shows."

"Well, I guess. Boy, you rolled that doobie like a pro. You, uh, deal a little weed, too?"

"Why? You a customer? Or a cop?"

"Maybe. . ."

"You wearing a wire?"

"I guess you better check, before lighting that J."

"I like taking risks. Here; first hit is yours."

"Man! That's good stuff!"

"A connoisseur. Or, a cop. Maybe I'd better check for that wire, after all."

"Maybe you'd better."

"These buttons are tiny. And I'm such a fumble fingers."

"You're doing O.K. Give me another toke."

"Well, I don't see a wire. I think I should take your blouse off, just to be sure. Don't want to wind up in handcuffs."

"No? That can be fun, you know. . ."

"Wow. You have the most spectacular breasts I've ever seen!"

"You're not the first person to tell me that. I've posed, for a few art photographers. I like to hold them, cup my hands under them, this way, feel the weight. And doing this can trip my trigger; I wet my fingers in my mouth, lightly circle my nipples, just barely touch them."

"I bet it would feel even better, if someone else did that for you."

"Let's find out."

"Well, it feels awfully good on this end. Your nipples are getting hard!"

"Uhm hmm. And, I think maybe there is a wire, after all. ‘cause I'm getting an electric shock that's nowhere near your hands!"

"I think I should check. OH! Pierced navel. An exhibitionist, eh? I could chip a tooth on that arrow. Boy, your jeans are tight! Suck your tummy in, Beth. There; got the button popped. Now, the zipper. Zip, zip, zip. Ever notice that the name is it's sound? Zzzzzzip."

"Zip, Zippy Zippy, zip-zip. I'm getting stoned!"

"Join the club. Lean on my shoulder, lift your leg, so I can get- OOPS! Your breast jumped into my mouth! Trying to distract me. Successfully, too. Lift your other leg. Yeah. Wow; a red thong. I guess I'd better peel it off. Can't be too careful, looking for wires."

"Nope. Nuh uh. Gotta be careful. Better safe than sorry."

"Just let me kneel down, feel around the back. . .Oh, what lovely buttocks. As soft and full as your breasts. I think I need to take a quick check, up front here, between your legs. Oh, you shave! That's so sexy, everything out in the open, on display. You like that, don't you? Going braless."

"Hey, if you've got it, flaunt it. I'm twenty three, young and tight and firm. Too soon, I'll be all flab and cellulite."

"Let me just put my fingers in here; these modern electronics are pretty small. My tongue is very sensitive, I better use it to search. Oh, oh, there's something! Kind of hard."

"Yeah, it is! And, I think it's transmitting some kind of electric signal, ‘cause I'm definitely getting a message!"

"Hey! You're hurting my ears!"

"Sorry. It's your own fault, starting that fire with your tongue. Good thing I've got all this wetness, to put it out. I need to sit down, now. Hey, no fair! You still have all your clothes on."

"I can fix that."

"Ooh, nice six pack abs."

"I have one of those gym machines, in the bedroom."

"We'll have to check that out. Later. Let me help you with those pants. Oh, silk briefs! You got a grapefruit in there?"

"Why don't you kneel down, find out for yourself?"

"Wow! What a monster. Only he's shy, won't look at me. He just stares at the floor. What's the matter, Mister Dickie, don't you like Beth?"

"Maybe if you gave him a kiss. . ."

"That seems to be working. God! I can't even get my hand around it! How big does this thing get?"

"Beats me. I never measured it. Want a ruler?"

"What I want, is to see how much of it I can get in my mouth."

"Looks like about half, to me. Sure does feel nice. Wet and warm. I love the way your lips look, big and pouty, as they slide down the shaft. Rake me with your teeth, Beth, just a tiny bit."

"Like that?"

"Yes! Like that. I really, REALLY like that! Only, you'd better stop, unless you want a surprise."

"I love surprises! And, I bet I can get more than half in my mouth."

"Ah, Beth! I'm gonna come. RIGHT N-N-NOW! Yeah, keep jerking it; oh, baby, more more more, that's it. Oh, stand up, kiss me, I want to taste myself."

"Mmmmm. That's sexy; all sticky and slippery. Rub it on my breasts. Oh, that feels sooo good."

"Let's go to the bedroom, have some real sex. I mean, oral is fun, it's great; but more of a preamble than the main event. Plus, I'll last a lot longer, the second time."

"Well, I hope so! That was a ten second explosion."

"Sorry. It's been a couple of months since I got laid."

"Me too. I went with a guy for about a year, but I could see it wasn't meant to be, so I broke it off. You probably think I'm such a whore, letting you get into my pants, ten minutes after we met."

"No, not at all. Sometimes there's an attraction. Like ZAP! You know; the way two magnets snap together."

"Unless their poles are reversed, and they can't get near each other. Oh, what a big bed. And satin sheets. You devil!"

"Come here, kiss me. Mmm, that's nice. I love the way your lips feel. You have the bluest eyes I've ever seen. Lie on your side. God, but you are a beautiful woman, Beth. I could look at you forever."

"Fine; only touch, too. Yeah, down there. Oooh, I'm wet again. And you're getting hard!"

"I'm going to slowly kiss my way down, starting here, with your neck. And your breasts. I want to suck your nipples, make them hard. Oh, boy; they get rosy red when you are turned on, you know that? Of course you do! And now your belly. You have such erotic skin; smooth, flawless. I love the tan lines. You wear a bikini, don't you?"

"Yes and no. Some times, nothing. When I go up on the roof."

"Do guys watch?"

"Uh huh. From an office building. I catch the sun, glinting off binoculars!"

"Slut!"

"Bad girl!"

"You taste awfully good, for a bad girl."

"Mmmm. You have such a talented tongue. Only, I want to fuck now. I want that big, stiff cock up my cunt! I hope that doesn't bother you. Dirty talk."

"No. It's a turn on. But it's not dirty. It's sexy, it's horny. I had a girl friend, a long time ago, who was a screamer. Had to be very careful when and were we did it. Made the mistake of doing it up here once, during Happy Hour. Talk about embarrassing!"

"Sorry for the laughter; I'm just picturing the whole scene! Hey, stop that, I'll come again."

"I thought that was the idea."

"I told you, I need to get fucked! Get up here, lie on your back. I want to get on top, ease that thing up into me. Man, you're harder than before! Let me throw a leg over."

"You want me to put it in?"

"No, I wanna do it all. You just lie there, like a piece of rental meat. I'm going to fuck myself. You like playing with my tits, don't you? Go ahead, tease my nipples. You can't see what I'm doing, can you?"

"Nope, just your lovely face, your silky chestnut hair, falling on your shoulders, your big breasts. I like the way they sway, when you move. What are you doing, down there?"

"I'm rubbing your cock head on my cunt, getting it all lubed. You're big, and I'm tight. It's gonna be a job of work!"

"I don't think so. Feels like it's already in."

"Yeah, but just the head. O.K., now I'm gonna slowly sit down on it. Oh, God! I'm getting stuffed. I need to rise up, get it slicker. There! All the way in! Oh, man oh man! If I rock back and forth, it presses against my clit. Squeeze my tits, Joe, squeeze my tits! Oh, Joe, Joe, I'm falling down the mountain! Hug me tight! Kiss me, kiss me. Deep, deep! Mmm, yeah."

"Hold on, Beth. Now I want to thrust, withdraw, thrust, shove it way, way, up your cunt. Wow; you're so tight. I was wrong, I'm not going to last very long this second time. Oh, here it comes; ah ah ah, oh Beth, baby. What are you DOING, inside? You have muscles that I never knew existed."

"You like my trick, Joe?"

"My little milk maid!"

"God, I feel so stupid, crying like this. Hold me, hold me, hold me."

"Did we fall asleep?"

"Huh? Jeez, I guess we did. For a while, anyway."

"Let's get a shower. I don't like this dried semen on me."

"O.K.Sure smells sexy, though."

"Soap my back, Joe. Hey! I said back, not ass."

"Your ass is part of your back."

"So are my heels, but I don't see you paying much attention to them."

"Touche. I love the slippery feeling of your wet, soapy body. I have this fantasy of pouring about a quart of warm baby oil all over both of us, and. . ."

"And it would be an awful mess to clean up. Not to mention that it would taste terrible!"

"Hey, I said it was a fantasy!"

"A pound of melted butter would be much better."

"I don't have a pound of butter."

"Put it on the shopping list."

"I'm starting to prune. Let's get out, dry off. You hungry?"

"Uh hum. Can I have a second helping of cock?"

"Slut! I meant food. You like Chinese?"

"Well, of course. Can we get delivery?"

"Golden Dragon, across the street. The food will be here before we get dressed."

"Then, why bother?"

"Throw on this robe. I'll call. Anything in particular you hungry for? Besides that! And, it's impolite to point."

"Oh, yeah? Well, you sure did a lot of pointing, about half an hour ago."

"Har har."

"Can we eat it in bed?"

"And you thought baby oil would make a mess! Oh, hell, why not; the sheets are going to have to be changed, anyway."

"Let's try the chopsticks. Here, I'll feed you a shrimp. Oops! Sorry."

"Ow! That's hot! Lick it off, bitch."

"Yes, master. Now you have to eat these noodles, off my tits."

"What are you doing with that plum sauce?"

"Basting your dick. It looks about done; all shiny. Pour me some more tea."

"Wow, that's a whole new definition of hot sex! Take another mouthful of tea, Beth; that feels sensational. You just come up with that, or is it part of your repertoire?"

"New, but a variation. My boyfriend and I use to kiss and drink coffee. This is waaaay better!"

"Climb on me, I want to eat you, too."

"You know what the square root of sixty-nine is?"

"No, not without a calc-"

"Ate something!"

"Exactly what I plan to do. Mmm, your breasts feel good, brushing against my stomach. You're really enjoying that plum sauce, aren't you?"

"Ho ho. Is that your tongue, or are you trying to stick a shrimp up my pussy?"

"Is it all right, me touching your ass with my fingers? Some women don't like that."

"No it feels. . .good. Strange, but good. I never had anyone do that."

"No? The anus has the same nerve endings as the lips, did you know that?"

"You're kidding! Maybe that's why your fingers feel so nice. You ever, you know. . .do it there?"

"No. Thought about it, but; no, never tried."

"You want to?"

"You mean now, with you?"

"No, you dope! I meant next week, with your brother in law."

"I don't have a brother in law."

"S.O.L. I guess you'll have to settle for me."

"O.K. We'll need a better lubricant than plum sauce, though. You think olive oil will work?"

"You don't have any sex stuff? KY, Astroglide? A dick big as yours, I'd think you would have some on hand."

"Sorry. I have lubricated condoms. Which I think we should probably use. I'm not so sure this is a good idea, us both being anal virgins."

"We can always send out for a coach. I bet you got a few downstairs, could talk us through it."

"Never mind! Kneel on the edge of the bed, raise your butt up."

"Ooh, that's cold!"

"Sorry. I can put the bottle in a bowl of hot water."

"No, I'm fine. I hope that's Extra Virgin olive oil! Oh, yeah, that feels lovely, whatever you're doing."

"That's my tongue. And this is my finger. Uhmm, tastes good, although I think it needs a little balsamic vinegar. . ."

"Put your finger in."

"First, I want to try to get my tongue in. It's softer, won't hurt as much."

"It doesn't hurt at all. How did you manage to get your tongue past the muscle?"

"Olive oil and perseverance. Plus, you seem to be relaxing."

"I am; because I'm really liking this. Trying new stuff is a turn on. Use your fingers, Joe. Open me up. Stretch me. Make me ready for your cock."

"O.K. Let me know if it hurts. I'm sliding my thumbs in, about an inch. Now I'm spreading them apart."

"Joe? Put your cock in my cunt, while you're doing that to my ass, with your thumbs. I need you inside me, right now."

"O,K., you say so. Only you'll have to put me in; my hands are tied up at the moment."

"More handcuff jokes? You're sick!"

"Ohh, that feels good! Can I thrust, or you you just want me in there?"

"I want you up my ass, Joe! I'm ready as I'll ever be. Oil up your cock and slide it in!"

"You're sure? You still feel pretty tight."

"Do it, damn you!"

"Here's goes, ahh, shoot. I can't get it in."

"Let me do it; I'll reach back between my legs . . . There! I've got it right at the entrance. Now, PUSH!"

"Oh, yeah, Beth, it's in; just the head. God, it's so tight."

"Move, move; in and out. I want to feel it move. Yes, that's good. Oh, I gotta play with my clit."

"Man, it looks so sexy, my dick going into your ass, all shiny with the oil. I don't know how long I can last."

"Think of Queen Victoria. Smokey the Bear. How far is it in?"

"Uh, about half way."

"More. Give me more! I want to feel your balls against my cunt!"

"There. That's all I got. How does it feel?"

"Packed. Stings, a little bit. Now, fuck me, Joe. Hard and fast; I'm about to come, and I need you to blast me."

"All the way out, all the way in, all the way out, all the way-"

"AH AH! Hooooooo!"

"INNNNNN! Oh, Lord, I never thought I could come like that. I gotta fall on you, I can't stand up. Baby, are you crying? Did I hurt you?"

"No no no no no. Can you keep it in me, if I roll over? I want to look at you, see your face, I want to kiss you, I want to hold you, I want I want I want. . ."

"I want to kiss away your tears. What the hell is that noise?"

"Shit! my cell phone. I bet it's Annie. Get my bag, Joe? I don't think I can walk, right now."

"Here you are. I'm going to go wash my dick; be right back."

"Hello? Annie? What the hell happened to you? No, it's all right, we can do it tomorrow. Yeah. What's this guy's name? Uh huh. See you, Annie."

"What's that all about?"

"Annie had to work late, and my cell number is in her other purse, at home. What a screw up."

"What's that I heard about a guy?"

"Yeah, the one she wanted to introduce me to, tonight. She says she thought we'd hit it off. I dunno. Some dude named Joe Coyne. . ."

"Come here, you! Snuggle, snuggle, snuggle."

"Joe? Can I spend the rest of the night?"

"Beth, you can spend the rest of the century."

"Mmmmmmm."