Off and Running

Bowen and Norma, Off and Running

The time did come, however, for Norma and I to give each other a rundown of our sexual histories. Each of us knew something about the other but only in bits and pieces. I was aware of Male Rule #1: "Never Tell Her Everything". I'm equally sure there is an equivalent Female Rule#1 which reads: "Always Make Him Think That You've Told Him Everything. But I thought, "Rules...Schmules!" If Norma and I were going to marry, I might as well give here whole story. But then my "Whole Story" wasn't much of a story to begin with so there wasn't much of a risk for me. Norma, on the other hand....who knew?

Norma and I sat down at the dinette table at my apartment. I had brewed a pot of coffee, anticipating that our session might last in to the night. I shouldn't have bothered.

I showed Norma my list, which was actually short, three names: Trudy, Jacqueline,and Dorothy.

Norma gave me a sidewise glance, "Cowboy, do you want me to believe that in your whole life...your WHOLE life...you've only had sex with three women? Really?

"Let me preface all this with an explanation," I was using my teacher's voice, "I grew up in a pretty straight laced family. I was an only child. I can't say that I was a result of the only time they had sex but it had to be one of a very few times they did it. I am almost positive that, after I was born, they were content with having just one child and dispensed with sex from then on. I never observed anything that I would identify as sexy between them, let alone any clue that they were having actual sex. Neither of them took the time to fill me in on what sex was and how one was to go about it. I had to accumulate the information haphazardly for myself and much of it was erroneous. I wouldn't say I was backward when it came to sex but...well...that's the truth.

"So, here's the list:

"Trudy: She was a Senior in high school and I was a Junior. I was smart and she was clever...and sexy..I can't leave that out. In exchange for writing her English and History essays, she would give me hand jobs...well... and an occasional blow job. We didn't actually do any fucking. We got close a couple of times but she didn't want to get pregnant and I was too timid to by condoms. So, there...that's that,

"Jacqueline: She was my college equivalent of Trudy, and on the same basis, only Jacqueline did enjoy having actual sex. We did this routine for one school year, we were both Freshmen, and then she dropped out of school--to marry her boyfriend. So, I guess what can be said of that was that I wasn't really a 'third wheel', I was more of a 'spare tire',

"Dorothy: My relationship with her was when I was in my senior year of college. We had fun sex and she is really the one who brought me out of my shell sexually. But it all ended when I graduated from college and headed off to here for my teaching job. Dorothy simply didn't want to move with me and we went our separate ways. In an odd sense, I recognized that it was just a 'convenient' relationship and didn't have much depth at all,

"That's IT! You were the next...and only...since I hit this burg. What else can I say?"

Norma looked stunned, "Really? REALLY? Is that all? What was the matter with those broads? Didn't they have any appreciation for you? I mean couldn't they at least have formed some of attachment with your cock? I am utterly mystified!"

"Well, Norma, I'm not exactly sure why," I reflected as I spoke, "my best guess is that maybe they thought I wasn't in their league, or thought other people or things were more important at the time. Who knows?"

Norma produced two pages from a yellow legal pad which were filled, single spaced, both from top to bottom. My heart dropped into my stomach. "What if, " I thought, "those pages were filled in both front and BACK!" As I found out. much to my relief, they weren't! But, still, TWO whole pages? Man!

"Cowboy! Don't jump the gun," Norma was quick to explain, "there isn't one person for every line! I have a couple or three lines for each one, if that's any consolation."

She put the yellow sheets on the table, smoothed them out. I could see that the sheets were set up in columns and rows, with color-coded highlighting. Norma put her finger on her first entry.

"So, Cowboy, I can take these in chronological order--first to last or last to first--I can do them alphabetically; I can do them by age, I can do them by gender...what's your preference?"

Much subdued, I asked, "Just tell me to start, Norma, how many people do you have listed there, if you have an exact count. I'd like to know that first."

Norma gave it a quick count just to re-verify her numbers, "Twenty-Two. But that's only before I met you. It is actually twenty-five if I include you, Mona, and Ms. Bloomfield but you already know about those. No...wait...it is actually twenty-seven. I just remembered the guy at the school office I gave a blow job to so I could get your address and phone number and the blow job I gave my friend who lets us use his house for sex weekends. I only blew each of them once, though, so they hardly count at all, the way I look at it."

I thought, "At least, it's good to know what some of the criteria are for 'SEX'....Blowjobs hardly count?"

"So, what's the breakdown, Norma? I am trying to get a general picture here. I'm not sure I want to hear about each and every one. Or, maybe you can just give me the list to read."

"Oh, Cowboy, don't feel so down. I think you knew I haven't exactly been a nun in a convent before we got together. And I know it might be a little damaging to your male ego, but I wouldn't be willing to tell you all about it if I didn't love YOU. And I do...and I want you to know all about me...and my sex life if we're going to be together."

"Just start with the breakdown, Norma. Start me off slow. If I want more detail, I'll ask for it."

"All right....the sum total of my sexual partners. I have to tell you here that I haven't counted myself as a sexual partner though, with all the masturbation I've done, maybe I should. Believe me, I've done a lot of it...and I still do.. But I know you jack off too so, if anything, I think there's an offset principle involved there...to be fair.

"So, partners: Excluding the five I've already mentioned, I count 18 men and 6 women and there's some overlap here. I mean there were times when I was fairly steady with one of my girlfriends and intermittent with a guy, or guys. The reverse is also true but not exactly the same. I found the guys I would have sex with were usually more than one-off's; women seem to like continuity. So, with the girls, I would say all but one were repeated encounters, that is, three times or more. But you need to remember that this is all over a six year span, or so. It's not like I crammed all of these into a few months, if that makes any difference to you.

"Now the guys, I would say that a dozen of them were one or two night stands. What can I say? The Corral is like that. But the other five or six lasted a while--weeks or months. The longest one was for my Junior school year...he was a senior, graduated, went off to the Army and we lost touch.

"I've got the first names written down but not their last names. I mean, honestly, I didn't know some of the last names. Most of the guys whose last names I know are still abound. One or two of them just might be at our wedding.

"Anyway, so....read this all for yourself. I'll understand if you will have second thoughts. I mean I never caught any STD;s, I never got raped or beaten up, I never got pregnant. I was just trying to have fun and, if you don't know it by now--but I suspect you do--I love sex! And now I love sex with YOU. Well, and I love it with Mona now, too but you know all about THAT. I'm not hiding anything from you..nothing! My final words...I LOVE YOU!"

Norma stood up, leaned over, and gave me a kiss on the forehead. She left the yellow sheet for me to go over. As she left, she gave me one look back and then gently closed the door.

After I heard her car on the gravel pulling out of the parking lot, I picked up her notes, got a kitchen match from the cupboard, and burned the papers in my metal wastepaper basket. As far as I was concerned what's past is past and should stay in the past.

The next day, I saw Norma at the farmhouse.

"So, what are you thinking, Cowboy?"

"I think I love you Norma," as I kissed HER on the forehead, "no, I'm SURE I love you."

"What about all of my 'others', you know in my past?"

"What 'others? What 'past'? That's all just smoke and ashes that have all blown away. There's nothing left of it now...not even ashes," I held up my hand up, palm upward, and blew across it, "the only question now is: Where do we go from here?"

*************************************************************

Wedding Bells! It was inevitable. Both Norma and I knew that. In the few months we had been together, we had formed a strong relationship. The next step was predictable. Walking down the aisle--vows "Until death us do part", and so forth. Again, Norma The Planner, had things worked out before I had even asked her to marry me--but actually, in a way, Norma asked me.

Norma and I woke up in bed together one Sunday morning in March, reminiscent of our first date, only we were at her friend's house out of town. We had done our customary night's worth of sex--though I had never gotten entirely accustomed to our vigorous love making routine--but with one exception. Snuggled between us was Mona!

Now, Mona had formed a strong attachment to Norma, based mainly on the girl/girl/girl threesome she had with Norma and Ms. Bloomfield. How I ever thought that bringing Mona with us was ever a good idea is still beyond me but Norma was all for it, for reasons that to me were now obvious. But Mona was only 18 years old, and an impressionable Goth, and clearly more lesbian oriented than bi-sexual, and I knew that she and Norma had been having sex with each other, not including me. Besides, our threesome didn't include me fucking Mona, or her giving me a blow job either. It was Mona servicing Norma orally, or vise versa, while Norma either sucked my cock or I was fucking Norma. I'm not even sure that Mona had ever had a cock inside her in whichever way.

But...for god's sake...she was a student of mine. Well, that last is technically not true. Mona graduated in from high school in February, having completed her credits in the Fall/Winter term. That made her no longer a student of mine but that would hardly be viewed that way in the eyes of others. Sleeping with teenage students, former or otherwise, was a job huge "No/No". On the plus side, Mona and Norma and I had a wonderfully trusting relationship. I felt I could depend on them not to get me in trouble.

"So, Cowboy, have you ever thought of making this permanent?" she whispered while Mona was still asleep.

"Making WHAT permanent?" I whispered back, "you and me, you and Mona? you me and Mona?? Huh?"

"No, you silly guy," she said giggling, while still trying to whisper, "no...you and me!"

"Well, I get down on one knee on the bed and ask you to marry me except for two things," I was trying to josh her, "One, I don't have a ring and, two, my cock would be hanging out and I'm afraid it would tickle Mona's nose!"

Norma laughed out loud...loud enough to wake up Mona, who seemed to be totally disoriented as to time, place, and purpose. She knew who she was with but wasn't quite sure if it was morning, that were in bed together and, if so, whether or not we were going to commence having sex again. Norma and I got out of bed and left drowsy Mona to catch a few more winks.

Norma and I got downstairs to the kitchen, both of us still naked, and started the coffee brewing.

"Bowen--and you know what means when I call you 'Bowen', Bowen," Norma, cooed, "what a wonderful way to wake up! With my lovers! What could be better?"

I tried to take a cue from her earlier hint without sounding facetious, "Norma, dearest Norma, love of my life Norma, exciting Norma, the creator and perpetrator of the best sex I've ever had Norma, I know I don't have a ring and I know I'm kneeling here naked with you--oh, and so are you--would you do me the honor and privilege of consenting to marry me...you and I get married...at your earliest convenient opportunity, in a venue of your preference, with guests of your selection in attendance. This offer will not expire even after we've put our clothes on. So, precious Norma, whaddya say? Let's do it! Huh?"

"O.K., Cowboy, I take it you got the hint," Norma pressed my head to her bosom, "you're on, Cowboy. We shall be married, we shall, to each other, we shall. We can work out the details, trust me."

So, there it was....Norma and I were engaged. I didn't have a ring for her and I knew I barely had enough money for even a half-way decent ring but we were going to go full speed ahead into a life together. I wasn't exactly sure what Norma meant by the details but I was confident we could work them all out...at least, I thought so at the time."

Norma and I went upstairs to the bedroom with three cups of coffee. By this time, Mona was among the living, sitting up in bed. We handed her one of the coffee cups and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Mona, sweet Mona," Norma prefaced the announcement gently, "we have some news for you. Bowen, Cowboy, here has officially asked me to marry him! Isn't that fantastic news?"

Mona looked a little confused, well, and what I would call crestfallen, too. "But, Mona...and you, too, Mr. D., I think that's wonderful," her lower lip was quivering, "but what is going to happen to me? Where am I going to go? Are you two going to forget about ME?"

I guess I underestimated the strength of the attachment between Norma and Mona, let alone the bond that Mona and I had formed. My heart went out to sweet Mona. I was asking myself the same question as Mona, only a little differently, "How does Mona fit into all this?"

Norma solved the problem but not as I expected. When she said she would work out the details, I think this was one of them that she had in mind.

Norma waited half a beat and said, "Well, Mona. Mr. D____ and I are going to get married but if you want to stay with us you can. It's not like you can get married to us but you can be part of our family, if you want. I know that sounds funny but we can work all of that out. You don't need to decide right this minute but think about it. I'd love to have you in our family and I think I can speak for Mr. D, too...right, Cowboy?"

Really, what choice did I have? Norma put it out there for both of us. I couldn't really disagree because I loved Mona, too. But it was hardly conventional. We couldn't address it as a sexual union; we would need to call it a family. And it wasn't like we had to adopt Mona; she was fully an adult in our State at 18 years old and could choose to live where she wanted, if we accepted her in. She was an only child, her father was off and gone for many years; her mother was too busy with her loser men friends to pay much attention to Mona. I think that may well explain Mona's "Goth" phase, a ploy for attention. But my guess also was that Mona's mother would be just has happy to have Mona gone for good. And it wasn't I'm sure that her mother felt as if she was scandalizing Mona by having sex with her men friends under the same roof as Mona...she didn't. But one less mouth to feed for Mona's mother was a bonus. It push came to shove, the words for Mona's mother were: "Bye Bye!

I nodded in agreement with Norma.

Inside I felt, "Hold on to your hat! This is going to be an 'E-Ticket' ride. A thrill a minute!"

I have Norma a kiss and I gave Mona a kiss, "I love the both of you!"

***********************************************************

Now, folks, you need to remember that in the 90's things like this were unheard of. That's not to say that three way relationships of the sort we were embarking on didn't exist, or that they weren't done. They simply weren't identified or, at least, not talked about...and therefore, unheard of! If the true nature of this type "family" were suspected or revealed, the participants were considered anathema and largely shunned. This was true even in many of those places where de facto polygamous unions were practiced. One man with two, or three, or four "wives", might be winked at in some places; but a man who had two women in his home, one bi-sexual and the other lesbian was taboo. Go figure!

The wedding plans were kicked into hyper drive. We decided on having a small wedding without a lot of the pomp and circumstance trimmings. Naturally, we scheduled the ceremony in June. Warren was cooperative as far as making the huge sward in front of his house available for the noontime rites, and graciously had a very nice catered luncheon reception put together for afterwards. The invited guests numbered in the 50's and extra food was built in for the unannounced "Plus 1's". In a stroke of irony, Norma made sure that Ms. Bloomfield received an invitation. (To our pleasure and amusement, she actually attended!) There was no question as to who would be the Maid of Honor--Mona, of course. We dispensed with the retinue of bridesmaids as well as ushers. Grant served as my best man and Warren was to give the bride away. All neat and tidy.

Now, there's always a wild card that turns up. The best laid plans of mice and men....you know. This one was in the form of the acceptance of my application for graduate studies at a university farm remote from the mid-west small town that I inhabited. So, on top of putting the wedding together, I had to plan to pull up stakes and head to the Northeast to engage in my continuing studies. Graduate program notwithstanding, I also had to work out details for a teaching job at my new university. Hard work, not a lot of pay. Worries, worries.

Norma was up to the task and shouldered the load for the wedding and even did some advance work on establishing herself in a job in our new Big City. It turns out that...well not exactly behind my back, but certainly unannounced...she got a building contractor's license for the state of her residence. She was smart, a quick study, and understood carpentry well enough to get through the tests. Now, her license would not be valid in our new state but it provided some cachet in acquiring a job in our new state. On top of that, her success in her old state might bode well for her licensing quest in our new state. Clever woman, that Norma G_____.

Before the wedding, Norma stayed at her father's farmhouse and she arranged to have Mona move there to be with her. Norma explained to her father what Mona's circumstances were, as far as Mona's mother was concerned, and Warren charitably made room for Mona. I am certain Warren had no inkling about the true nature of Mona's and Norma's relationship and I have no doubt the girls kept things well under wraps while there. This put a crimp in my sex life with Norma but we still managed sex here and there, on the fly. Did I mention that Norma was great at quickie blow jobs?

The wedding took place, vows were exchanged, the reception went off well, toasts were struggled with, the bouquet was thrown (Honest, Ms. Bloomfield caught it!) and off I went the very next day to my new school. My high school wasn't happy to see me go but I got a sterling recommendation from the school administrators. Even, Ms. Bloomfield also gave me a praiseworthy recommendation mostly, I think, because she was glad to see me go mainly because Norma's "blackmail" tape would have far less chance of being used with both Norma, Mona, and me out of the picture. Norma is smart but she isn't spiteful; she wouldn't use "The Tape" just to be vicious. Personally, though, Norma, Mona, and I often looked at just for pure enjoyment...and it spiced up our threesomes, to boot. In fact, when new video processes were introduced, we managed to get the VHS tape reprocessed to the point where all the indistinct images became a lot sharper. We even got it to the point where we could visualize the pubic hairs. Ah, technology....!