Edited by Quinn McMullen
This story was originally all together in one part. After many kind comments I have expanded several sections and divided it into three parts to make it easier for you the reader. All characters are at least 18 years of age. Special thanks to Quinn McMullen for all his efforts with editing. It was no small task!
_ _ _ _ _
Dear diary,
I am not really the write-in-a-diary kind of person but with nothing else to do here we go.
We arrived last night at my Gram's condo. She had left me a little care basket and in among other things was this leather-bound diary and several really nice pens.
There was also a note saying she had linked one of her credit cards to my room key. Gram said I would be able to use it for a spa day or anything else I may need around the resort. She told me not to worry about how much things cost and to consider anything I purchased a graduation present. She said she would see me in a few weeks so try to enjoy myself.
It's still raining, but they say the actual storm hit last week. The cable and internet are down, not that I am allowed to use them, leave it to Gram to find something for me to do when there is nothing to do, and she isn't here.
I'm also not sure on diary etiquette if there is such a thing. Am I supposed to be addressing the diary as if it is my close personal confidant, or am I writing to my future self for review and self-reflection? I think it may be both.
I can't remember the last time I put pen to paper. I mean, don't we live in the civilized world. My fingers already hurt.
_ _ _ _ _
Dear Diary,
It's Tuesday.
After some reflection, I have decided you are my only companion for the next week and a half until my Gram gets here. You are a place I can write my thoughts without fear of repercussions or judgment. It will be within your pages I write, then reflect on what has brought me to this point in my life. I will also be documenting what it is like to be me.
So, let's back up a little and catch you up on the events that have landed me on this tropical island for the summer.
A little over a year and a half ago was my senior year. It was supposed to be one of the best years of my life. The pinnacle of childhood. That golden moment before crossing the magical threshold of adulthood and responsibility.
A quick recap. My family, Mom, Dad, my two older brothers and I relocated to a small town in Michigan from sunny Fort Lauderdale. It was the summer before I was to start my ninth-grade year.
So, I started from scratch in this little rural town far from the hustle and bustle of city life. I wasn't a typical teen growing up. While my two brothers, who were four and six years older, were the epitome of cool. I was not. Not only was I a bit of a late bloomer, but I was more than a little awkward. After the move, my parents became very strict with me. I was never encouraged to make friends. When it came to social skills, well, I had none. As far as friends I may have had, they had been left behind 800 miles away.
So, I turned my attention to school, and for the next three years, I was top of the bottom ten percent of my class. Yeah, let that sink in. I did just well enough to not be noticed. On top of my academic failure and lack of friends Mom and Dad never allowed me to date or attend social functions that included both sexes.
I had a few friends, but they were not popular kids. As a matter of fact, I secretly hated them for not being popular. On the first day of my freshman year, I was invited to sit at a table by what looked like a normal human. She was nice and had a great personality. What I didn't know is every one of her friends was a bottom feeder. I was quickly shunned by the "cool kids" after that fateful day. It's amazing how sitting at the unpopular kid's table one time had earned me a new label. Loser. To say I had all kinds of self-image problems would be the understatement of the year.
Flash forward to my senior year and things just got worse. First, the world tried to end with a global pandemic that shut down my life. Then we didn't know if we were going to have school let alone graduate. That was fine by me by the way. In the end, none of that mattered. Well not for me anyway. I ended up slipping on some ice and I fell down a flight of stairs. I remember the slip, and then I remember it was like something sucked the light away from my eyes, but nothing after that.
Among all my other injuries it turned out that I broke my neck. Go me! My doctors were optimistic however, and told me, with physical therapy over the next few years, I may even regain control of some of the motor functions in my arms, but I would most likely never walk again. I spent my eighteenth birthday in a hospital bed recovering from my second surgery and that is when the depression really set in.
Flash forward four months. I had my fourth surgery. This time to fuse two of my vertebrae for pain management. The long and short is when I woke up, I had to pee. Still groggy and disorientated from the anesthesia, I sat up and swung my feet off the bed. All the alarms started going off when things were disconnected and by the time the nurse got in the room. I was halfway to the bathroom. I don't remember any of the incident, but that's what they told me when I woke up several hours later. Everything seemed to be working again, including my nerve endings. The pain was almost unbearable.
I still needed lots of physical therapy. Begrudgingly my body continued to heal as did my mental health. I ended up graduating despite all the school I missed and started to feel like I had been given a second chance to live my life. I wanted to live it in full. Maybe I would travel to exotic places and do exotic things. That is until my parents informed me if I was to continue living at home, I would need to start community college in the fall. With no job, no money, and no life, I reluctantly did as I was told and that is when the pendulum of luck began to swing the other way.
The week before college started, my Gram came to visit. The last time I saw her was just before we left Fort Lauderdale over four years ago. I was super excited to see her. Before we moved, she was a staple at the house. She had helped raise me and my brothers and she was super cool. I'm not sure why she hadn't been around the past few years, but I was excited to have her back in my life.
Since she was in town, and everyone else was busy, my father had asked Gram if she would be willing to take me shopping for school clothes and supplies. She agreed and bright an early on Tuesday morning we were off like a whirlwind and headed forty minutes away into the city.
The thing I liked most about Gram, besides everything, was she treated me like an adult. That simple fact made me realize my parents still treated me like a child.
Gram said first things first, and she took me to a spa where over the next several days I would be introduced to the wonderful world of full-body massages, facials, manicures, pedicures, and waxing.
As we entered, the smell of lavender and eucalyptus embraced us. There was a large piece of fogged glass that was ceiling to floor. It separated the reception area from the rooms. Water ran down the glass ending up in a small pond full of little black stones. The sound of wind instruments played in the background almost imperceptibly.
We were greeted by a young Asian woman wearing a white tunic style top that gathered at the waist and matching slacks. She greeted us warmly and handed each of us a little card with a list of all the services available. Not having a clue on what I was doing I cheated on my homework so to speak and copied all my Gram's answers. Gram asked if I wanted to do a couples massage or did, I want my own masseuse. Feeling a little nervous I decided to buddy up with Gram.
We were then led to a room with two tables softly lit with real candles. It smelled faintly of spruce. There were robes and towels laid out for us. I watched as Gram began to strip. Turning partially away from her I followed suit.
I watched her out of the corner of my eye. While I had seen old women walk around naked at the YMCA, I had never seen my Gram naked before. She looked much different than they had. Her skin wasn't quite as wrinkly, and her skin and breasts didn't sag. I wondered if maybe Gram had a boob job. They seemed as perky as mine. Then she slipped her robe over her naked body, and I followed suit.
A few minutes later there was a knock at the door, and we were led to the steam room. Gram took off her robe and hung it on the hook right in front of the lady. She didn't seem ashamed of her nakedness at all. I just hoped that I could be as confident with my own body someday. I waited until the lady had turned and was walking away before I slipped off my own robe. Then stepping through the door, I disappeared into the steam of the room.
Immediately I was surrounded by heat, and the strong smell of cedar and eucalyptus. It was like two million degrees and hard to breathe the hot damp air. Gram was pouring some water on rocks. I sat on the lower bench and watched a plume of fresh steam permeate the air.
Gram then sat on the top bench and leaned back against the wall closing her eyes and breathing deeply. I moved up to her bench, but then ended up moving back down because it was too warm for me.
I found myself continuing to glance over at Gram. Although the steam obscured my view, I notice how large her areolas and nipples were.
"They're not real."
She startled me when she spoke, and I turned sharply away closing my eyes. I leaned back on the bench behind me even though it was hot on my back.
Keeping my eyes closed I said, "They're not?"
"I got a tune up a few years ago, I was tired of looking at someone so much older than I felt in the mirror. Upper thigh and neck are still a bit wrinkly, but the rest of me turned out pretty good if I do say so myself. Turned sad Cs into Happy Ds. Besides, when you take care of yourself the men tend to notice and take care of you too."
Somehow, I felt the heat of my cheeks despite the heat of the room. After a few minutes my body began to relax, and my breathing became easier. I think the eucalyptus was opening my airways. I could feel my pours open and the sweat leaving my body.
After about fifteen minutes there was a familiar knock on the door. Gram and I stood and walked out of the sauna. There was a giant overhead shower just outside the door that was already turned on and running. I watched as Gram stepped into the stream of water.
I should have suspected something when I saw Gram's nipples draw up tight. But no, I stepped unwittingly into the freezing stream of water after she exited. My own nipples followed suit; my entire body was now covered in goose bumps. I screamed and jumped out.
Gram laughed, "Refreshing isn't it?"
I dried myself off, "Very funny Gram, hope you're having a good time."
