To Live Again

Written for Outalevel...

When I was in my thirties, my wife and I were friendly with a couple that would visit us frequently. They had a teenage daughter who would visit with them and she seemed to take every opportunity to place herself in provocative positions when she was around me. She would come to our house braless and seemed to delight in flashing her bare breasts at me when no one was looking. "Accidental" touching occurred and knowing looks passed between us, but that was as far as it went. Eventually she married and left home, but the memories of her never left me.

Her name was Casey, and she was a real beauty, even back then. She was small and slim with this gorgeous brown hair that spilled almost to her waist. I guess the most remarkable thing about her were her huge liquid green eyes with long, slightly curling lashes. She used to lower those lashes and peer at me from under them with an expression that was pure sex. I won't say I wasn't turned on, even tempted, by her, but she just a young girl and I was happily married.

Some years after all this transpired, my wife and I separated and then divorced. Those were hard times for me. I spent a lot of time in bars, having one-night stands and drinking. I had my own apartment then, a small one-room affair perched on the fifteenth floor of a building downtown. I spent most of my time on the balcony with a bottle of beer staring out over the city and reviewing my life. I guess I was depressed, but wasn't willing to admit it, even to myself.

On my fiftieth birthday I went to a hotel bar by myself and watched televised sports. My intent was to find a willing woman, have a night of fun, and begin another day. I was scanning the bar for attractive women when my eyes met with a familiar smoldering green-eyed gaze. My heart lurched. It was Casey, but so changed! I quickly calculated and realized she would be in her early thirties now. She was still just as beautiful as ever, but much more grown up now, much more appealing. She had cut her hair, but it was still long and at the moment, hanging loose over her shoulders. She studied me for a moment as if trying to remember who I was and then she smiled walking over.

"Ben," She said warmly.

"Is that you?" I stood up, wishing I had bothered to take pains with my appearance as I clasped her hand in a clumsy handshake.

"Casey?" I asked and she laughed richly. "The one and only." She replied, and then glanced around. "

Are you here with Mary?" Regret curled up dark and hard in my stomach. "Mary and I divorced some years ago." I told her. "I came here alone." Casey gave me a sympathetic look. "Oh I'm so sorry." I shrugged. "Don't worry about it, would you care to join me?" Casey smiled as she slid into the chair across from mine. "I'd love to." She said. I took stock of her figure as she moved to sit. She was filled out more than before, but still quite slim with an enticing amount of cleavage showing above the collar of her black velvet blouse. She was wearing tailored ivory business slacks so I couldn't see her legs but I could see how graceful her figure was. My gaze drifted to her left hand and saw the ring there.

"You're still married, then?" I asked nodding toward it. Casey glanced down at her ring and shook her head. "Marc and I got divorced years ago. I'm engaged now to someone new." I felt mildly disappointed. "Oh I see, is he a good guy?" Casey shrugged reaching over and taking a sip of my drink. "I thought so. I caught him cheating on me last night." She sighed. "That's actually why I'm here." I frowned. "I'm sorry. Why would anyone cheat on you?" Casey met my gaze. "What do you mean?" I felt embarrassed then.

"Well…you're a very attractive woman." Casey blushed. "I don't know." I glanced at her ring again. "Is the wedding still on." Casey's eyes drifted from the table to meet my face. "I don't think so. I don't know." I reached out and tentatively patted her shoulder. "It's going to be all right. You should find a man who will cherish and value you. You deserve that much." Casey caught my hand and held it against her shoulder, making my heart pound. "Thanks Ben…you've always understood me." This made my mind drift to the past and I smiled ruefully. "Even if there was nothing I could do about it." Casey's gaze flew to my face. "What do you mean?"

"You were rather flirty. Don't tell me I imagined that." I chuckled. Casey's cheeks colored faintly. "Well…you're a very attractive man Ben, even now. In fact, I think you look better now then you did then. I never did like Mary. I thought you could do better." For the first time in a long time, I felt my spirits lift a little. "Really? What kind of woman do you think I should be with?" Casey shrugged. "Someone kind, attractive, smart…" I looked at her intently.

"Someone like you?" Casey smiled, glancing away. "Maybe." A meaningful silence hung between us for a moment. "So, what are you doing here?" She asked. "Celebrating my fiftieth birthday." I told her. Casey looked surprised. "You're celebrating by yourself?" I nodded. "Well that's no way to celebrate," She scolded. I thought for a moment, wondering how to stack the deck. "Think you could improve upon it?" Casey's gaze drifted to the dance floor, then back to me, a slight smile touched her mouth and I smiled. "Ah, care to dance?"

We moved to the dance floor and taking her in my arms felt like coming home. She smelled like baby powder and soap. I held her close to me, feeling her silky hair against my cheek. It didn't matter then that I was twenty years older than her. I was thoroughly taken with her. We danced three times before I built up the courage to kiss her. Her lips were petal soft and tasted like wine. When we broke the kiss we could clearly see what each other was thinking. "So, you're staying here?" I asked her quietly. "Yes…I really should get back to my room. Will you walk with me?" We walked off the dance floor, through the bar and across the lobby to the elevators, never saying a word, just standing there feeling the electricity flow between us. We rode to the sixth floor and got off. I followed her down the hall to her room and took the key from her, opening the door, praying that this wasn't goodnight. Casey shyly lowered her lashes, giving me that old look I remembered so well. "Would you like to come in?" I followed her inside and she shut the door behind me, twisting the deadbolt and putting the chain on. She walked across the room to the Stereo and put on a Celine Dion song called,

Seduces Me

.

"Dance?" She asked. I took off my jacket and moved slowly across the room toward her. She was already swaying softly to the music, turning down the lights. We met in the middle of the room and I pulled her tight against my body, my mouth finding the soft flesh of her neck, the curve of her collarbone, the silk of her shoulder as I slid the blouse away from her body. She leaned her head back, her hair falling over my arm as my hands caressed the satiny flesh of her chest, over her breasts and down the flat of her stomach. My hands came to the clasp of her trousers and I unfastened them with nimble fingers, watching them slide away from her body. Her legs were long, lean, and tone, worthy of a trophy. I tipped her gently against the wall and lifted one of those long, supple legs and began to kiss my way up the smooth surface.

My mouth found her ankle and calf, the curve of her knee. Her hands played gently over my shoulders, her body warming beneath me. I kissed her thigh, her hip, and went up her ribcage back to her lips. We kissed for a long time, my hands exploring the map of flesh beneath them, finding the hook of her bra and tugging it off with careless ease. We circled slowly in place, dancing to the hot, thrumming music. I took her breasts in my hands and felt the moan of pleasure against my lips. I hooked my fingers through the fabric of her panties and tugged them slowly down her body, dropping to my knees. Once there I gripped her thighs and pulled her forward inhaling the soft, musk scent of her, using my mouth to open and explore her. Casey gasped, hands kneading my neck as her fingers slid through my hair.

I slid my tongue into the hot core of her, my arms wrapped around her waist as she sank slowly to the floor. I used my fingers to probe her, trailing hot kisses up her thigh to her belly as she writhed, moaning in pleasure. I tugged off my shirt, casting it aside to join the other clothes strewn across the floor. Casey wrestled with my belt buckle, finally pulling it loose. She fumbled with my slacks and I was already rock hard, straining against the thin fabric. She pulled my slacks and boxer shorts down together around my thighs and took me in her mouth with an eager want that took my breath away. I groaned as her hot, wet mouth enveloped my aching cock.

Unable to stand it any longer I spilled her onto her back and grabbed her legs above the knees and dragged her across the floor toward me. "Ben," She breathed haggardly as I entered her. I made it slow and sweet, unable to believe how wet and tight she was. Had she been any less wet I may not have been able to fit inside her. I pressed deep inside of her and held still, caressing her throat with my tongue, catching her bottom lip sensuously between my teeth.

Slow and steady I began to make love to her, groaning at how good she felt. Casey pressed herself after me as if to object to my retreating cock and I gave her what she wanted. Capturing her shoulders in my hand I held her still as I moved faster and harder, racing toward something both of us had wanted for so long that it had grown from simple desire to obsession.

As I stroked in and out of her, I seemed to be striking hard at the heart of her making her cry out my name and arch against me. I was sweating, breathing hard now as I fucked her, pounding me hips against hers. "Oh God Ben, please, oh god don't stop. Don't ever stop." Egged on by her words I fucked her harder, listening to the song restart on repeat. It's slow rhythm seemed to be thumping slowly though every vein in my body as I rocked in and out of her body with a hot desire that overwhelmed me.

Casey suddenly lunged, rolling her weight, flipping us so she sat on top of me. "Oh God!" She gasped, grounding her hips against mine. Balancing neatly on her feet she plunged up and down on me, making vivid colors flash brightly before my eyes. She climaxed then, crying out as she shuddered atop me. I gasped, grabbing her hips and bringing her down hard on me. I held her firm and rocked in and out of her, feeling her climax twice more before I could no longer stand it and I exploded deep within her. Casey cried out and spilled off of me while I was still cumming. It splashed against her stomach, spraying across her breasts as she fell onto the floor beside me. Breathing heavily we lay next to each other in the darkness and listened to our pounding hearts.

After what seemed like forever, I summoned the energy to pull her close to me, feeling some deep wound inside of me finally close and heal. We fell asleep, holding each other, and dreamed of each other.