It had been an entire week since Tricia got her early admission letter for University of Arizona. Plus she'd had her eighteenth birthday, a depressingly low-key occasion, about a month ago. Tricia realized she could finally start dating.
She brought it up with her mother after dinner. "Um...mom...I think I'm ready to start dating."
Her mother looked up from her book and sighed. "I guess it's going to happen sometime soon whether I approve of it or not. So thank you for telling me, sweetheart. I'll call your doctor in the morning and we'll get you started on birth control as soon as possible."
Tricia thought she was just delivering an FYI. So it wouldn't come as a total surprise or a betrayal if she went out on a date. This was more than she was expecting.
"Whoa. I did say 'start' right?"
"Take it from me and your father. It only takes one slip up to change you life," her mother said. "I was in college when I got pregnant with you, and I had to drop out. Remember how long it took for me to get my degree?"
She knew the story of her origins better than she really wanted to. Her parents had once let it slip that they'd only done it the once, that was all it took. After that, Tricia noticed all the teenage pregnancies and unexpected children on her mom's side of the family. Tricia's arrival shouldn't have been all that surprising; the women in her family seemed to get pregnant at the sight of a sperm cell.
While Tricia had spent most of her high school years decidedly not dating, she had put some thought into who she would date when it was time, and she really, really hoped it was Brent.
Tricia had a crush on Brent for years, and he'd always been nice to her too. Especially since they'd been running the school newspaper together this year. He was tall and strong enough to have been on football or basketball, but she liked that he chose something nerdier, even if he was blatant about doing it for the sake of college admissions.
Last she heard, Brent wasn't seeing anyone, but Tricia hadn't exactly been plugged into the gossip circuit. It was a Friday afternoon, and every time he looked at her, it made her wonder how he felt. She couldn't concentrate at all on the website they were supposed to be building.
Tricia realized she could wait and see if Brent would make a move, but she also didn't have a lot of time left, not if they were going to have a relationship or something. Maybe that was thinking too far ahead, but she felt like she knew him already. She had some idea what she was getting into.
She decided to just go for it. "One second, and then we can get back to...I got into University of Arizona."
"That's awesome!" Brent said. "So did I!"
She knew he had applied there, but she didn't know he'd gotten in.
"Congrats to you too! Do you want to go to the boardwalk tonight to celebrate?"
He blinked with surprise and blushed. "Yeah, that sounds great."
Her distraction had spread to him; when they parted that afternoon, he offered to pick her up later.
Tricia's heart was racing as she got ready that night, picking her cutest outfit--no, her most alluring one--no, best to just be comfortable--or, what would be easiest to slip out of? She took her first birth control pill, and her mother had Tricia set an alarm on her phone to make sure she took them regularly at the same time every day. Tricia knew it was too soon to expect the pills to protect her. But if something happened with Brent tonight, she didn't want to say no. She'd been waiting years for this moment. Maybe she could get a morning-after pill.
They had the best time together at the boardwalk. Snow cones and fries. Rides and arcade games. Brent won her an oversized teddybear, so when the three of them piled into the ferris wheel, she had to sit close to him. She could feel the heat where they touched, and he held her hands. She thought they were going to kiss then, but the ride was too short.
He brought her home without her even asking, and she lingered in the front seat a moment. Then he kissed her. It felt awkward at first. His lips felt soft and passionate against hers, but she didn't know what she was doing. After they took a breath together, he kissed her again, his tongue slipping just into her mouth. She had always expected to be grossed out by that, but with Brent, she wasn't. His arms were around her, and she pressed back against him.
And then he pulled away. Their first kiss--her first kiss, and what a kiss!--was done, and that was all she was in for, apparently.
Alone in her room, she imagined his hands going further, sliding down her backside, or around to the front, teasing her breasts through her bra, cupping her between her legs where she could press her pubic bone against him...she came to a roaring orgasm even though it was her own fingers doing the work and not his. Was there any chance things could have gone further? Anything she could have done differently?
Over the weekend, Tricia really felt the pill kicking in. According to the package it'd be a full week before it'd be effective, but the side-effects were getting a head start. It was making her gain weight. But then again, what wasn't? It was also making her sick to her stomach just after taking the pill.
One week, she thought. She could handle it that long at least. She imagined offering herself to Brent the next Friday. Maybe they could lose their virginity to each other, without a care in the world.
At school the next week, Brent would smile at her when they passed in the hallway, maybe a bit more than before. He didn't act like they were in a relationship, and Tricia had to remind herself that they weren't yet, were they? It had just been the one date.
Friday afternoon, Tricia was starting to wonder if she should just kiss him right there by the table where they were laying out articles for the next issue of the newspaper. She imagined him sweeping the papers off the table and laying her down there. In her fantasy, they could just close the door and no one would barge in or think it was suspicious.
"Want to come over and watch a movie later?" Brent asked.
"Yeah," she replied, before even knowing what movie.
She biked over to his house after dinner, looking forward to spending time alone with him. She rang the doorbell and Ally answered.
"Oh hey! Brent mentioned you might be joining us. Come on in," Ally said.
Ally was another girl in their senior class. She was lanky, with short, spiky hair. Dark eyebrows and light skin. Ally had never been unkind to Tricia, but Tricia had never learned to be comfortable around pretty girls like her. It wasn't even like Ally did herself up like some did--she didn't have to.
Ally led Tricia through the living room to the kitchen, where Brent's mother was pulling a bowl of popcorn out of the microwave.
"Thanks Mrs. G," Ally said.
"You must be Tricia," Mrs. G said. "Welcome. Okay, I need to get some rest. If you kids need anything, come up and wake me. I'll have my earplugs in and my CPAP on, but don't be alarmed."
With that, Brent's mother went upstairs. Meanwhile Ally led Tricia downstairs to the den like she owned the place.
"Hi Tricia," Brent said. "What should we watch?"
They ended up picking an action movie that Brent and Ally had seen already. They didn't specify whether they saw it together, but Tricia was starting to suspect it. But they said it was good, and Tricia felt like they were rewatching it for her sake.
This wasn't the romantic night she'd been hoping for. It was starting to be hard to imagine losing her virginity tonight. All those pills that made her feel awful, and it would all be for nothing. Unless maybe they waited until Ally went home. Ally did have a home of her own to go to, right?
Her worries melted away when the three of them squeezed onto the sofa, and she felt Brent's arm encircle her shoulders. The popcorn didn't last long. His hand caressed her arm at first, a light, pleasant distraction from the movie. Then his touch moved to her collarbone, her neck. Could they make out, with Ally here? Because Tricia really wanted to, but Brent was staring ahead. He was making her feel feverish and wet and tingly. It was hard to keep her breathing steady.
Then his hand moved down her chest, inch by inch, making her gasp as he reached her right breast. She brought her hand to his, holding it there, letting him know she wanted it. It felt a little odd that they hadn't kissed tonight, but they'd already gotten to first base before. And there was only so much they could get away with in the dark, sharing a couch with Ally.
Tricia slid her other hand over to Brent's lap, wondering if she'd find him as aroused as she was. She wanted him to know he could expect more from her later that night. But her fingers found another hand there. In the dim glow reflected off the projector screen, she saw Ally's hand rubbing Brent's thigh, where a large bulge clearly stood out inside his jeans. And it didn't seem like he was in a rush to stop her.
The entire scene shifted in Tricia's head. This wasn't a private sneaky moment between her and Brent. He was all but getting a hand job from Ally, and he was just feeling Tricia up while it happened. She had wanted to move fast, but this wasn't headed in a promising direction. And she felt jealous. She'd felt it from the start, but tried to keep herself in check. She had wanted Brent, and she hadn't realized that meant having him to herself, but apparently it did. This was all too sudden and jarring for her, and she wasn't about to sit there while Ally jacked Brent off.
"Sorry, I just remembered, I left the oven on. My parents are going to be pissed if they get home before I do," she quickly lied.
"Oh. Are you sure?" Brent asked.
At the same time, Ally said, "Oh that sucks. Maybe another time."
"Yeah. I...gotta go," Tricia said, and rushed out, leaving no opportunity for either of them to stop her. She was still fully clothed, but she couldn't shake the feeling that she'd left something behind.
She muttered curses all the way home. When her reminder went off the next day, she was facing the prospect of a pill that made her feel awful, and with no prospect of a reward for it. She decided to skip it. Maybe she was moving too fast. Maybe Brent wasn't the right one after all. She could always start the pills back up and be safe after a week.
She saw Brent at his locker on Monday. She thought of not saying anything, but couldn't help herself.
"So...what did I miss after I left?"
He sighed, and explained in a low voice. "Look, Tricia. I'm sorry about Ally. She's been living next door since we were in kindergarten together and we've been friends forever. But lately she's been...pushing the boundaries of that."
