The Love of My Life

In this part, I discover the joys of oral lovemaking after a surprise session with the Chair of Psychiatric Medicine.

*******

On Monday afternoon, I was still confused and reeling about my lovemaking with Rob over the weekend. I felt I had crossed a boundary and was worried that there could be no turning back. I had actually enjoyed being spanked at the height of the sexual tension between us. The thought of being physically abused by a man was abhorrent, yet our playing at me being punished during sex had clearly contributed to one of the most powerful experiences of my life. Then there was my promise to let Rob eventually fuck me in the ass. What in hell had I been thinking. Well, I had not been thinking because I had been too anxious to come when I had agreed.

My mood didn't improve when at the end of the last class of the day, my professor called out to me as she dismissed the class and asked me to speak with her when everyone left.

"Hi Jennifer. Dr. Wolnieki has asked me to have you drop by her office to see her after this class."

"What about Professor? I hardly even know her."

"I don't know why Jennifer. But she was pretty adamant that I insist upon you seeing her."

Dr. Wolnieki was the Chair of Psychiatric Medicine for both the faculty and the university hospital. I wandered around the administrative wing of the faculty until I finally found her office.

"Good afternoon Professor. I am told you wanted to speak to me?"

"Oh hello. It's Jennifer isn't it?" When I nodded my assent, she asked me to come in, close the door and sit down. To say that I was suddenly very much on edge at that point would have been the understatement of the week.

"Do you have a boyfriend named Rob, a law student?"

"Yes, why do you ask?"

"Would it be safe for me to assume that it was you screaming in his apartment last Friday night about 7 p.m.?"

I had to cover my mouth with both hands and look anxiously for a wastepaper basket, for I was sure that I was going to throw up at any second. Dr. Wolnieki seeing my reaction, grabbed a basket, came around her desk and put a comforting arm upon my shoulder. She then began to explain.

"I have been worried sick about you all weekend. I wanted to call the police that evening, but when you stopped, my husband talked me out of it. The thought of one our female medical students being trapped in an abusive relationship is beyond my ability to tolerate. If you that is the case and you are unable to free yourself from that kind of a relationship, I am going to have to insist to the Dean that you be subject to mandatory counselling. A doctor cannot help her fellow women patients if she too is a victim of this kind of abuse."

"How do you know about Rob and me?"

"My husband and I have our condo directly across the hall from where Rob lives. I had seen the two of you in the parking garage before as we were leaving to go out for dinner. Then I noticed you out of my office window a couple of times later when he walked you back to the faculty. Not too many of our students kiss their boyfriends that long at our front doors. Last Friday night, as we were leaving our apartment to go for dinner, we could hear you screaming and swearing in the hallway."

"Oh my God! It's not like that. Not at all Professor. You don't understand..."

"Then please explain it to me," she interrupted.

When I insisted I was too embarrassed and did not want to talk about it, Dr. Wolnieki made it clear I could either tell her why I was not the victim of abuse, or she would talk to the Dean as she had threatened.

"Do you have any water? I need a moment to gather my thoughts."

Dr. Wolnieki grabbed a bottle of water from a small bar fridge built into her bookcase, told me to take my time, then pulled her chair close to mine to take hold of one of my hands. "I want to help you. You have to trust me," she said. Determined to be as clinical in my speech as possible, I began.

"Rob and I began dating in late October last year. It has been incredible. We are both very much in love. I have only had two long term relationships before, and neither were really very satisfying. Rob is three years younger, in first year law, and was introduced to me by his sister Megan, who is in my class. We immediately hit it off, intellectually and physically."

"I had little sexual experience," I continued. "I had never achieved an orgasm with the men in my other relationships. Rob is a masterful lover and I can achieve orgasm, sometimes multiple, in any lovemaking session we have."

I stopped, only to have Dr. Wolnieki kindly tell me to carry on. "Last Friday night, I wanted to seduce Rob. I am actually a very assertive person, and the two of us enjoy playing at who will dominate and be the lovemaker when we make love. I wanted to be in charge that night, and I was taking a great deal of pleasure in teasing him as we got into it, threatening to delay his release. He decided he had enough teasing and that he would take charge. He overpowered me and drove me crazy by restraining my hands and legs while he brought me to orgasm. Then we began intercourse with him on top, with he very much enjoying the fact that he was now "in charge". I used my thighs and legs to completely immobilize him, and began teasing him, telling him that now that I had found my release, he either played my way, or we had dinner." Dr. Wolnieki had this reassuring and sympathetic look on her face that gave me the confidence to blabber on.

"Rob began tickling me to get free, put me over his knee and spanked me three or four times, then asked me if I was prepared to "be a good girl" or some nonsense like that. I was mortified, very angry and - I am still in disbelief about this, incredibly aroused. Instead of telling him to stop or let me up, I yelled and swore at him. I am sure I knew that would only result in his continuing to spank me. This went on two or three more times, me screaming expletives at him each time he finished with three or four more spanks and his asking me if I was ready to make love his way. I never told him to stop, and if I had, I know he would have immediately. We finished making love with me having a very powerful orgasm. I am not sure how these past few days could be more mortifying - first enduring a spanking only to discover that it was incredibly arousing, or now being embarrassed by having to tell a faculty member all of this." And at that, I started to cry and then worse, sobbed.

Dr. Wolnieki immediately hugged me and began to apologize profusely. She grabbed a box of tissues for my tears, wiped my face and held both my hands. As I recovered, she said, "Maybe you might want to think about closing the bedroom door in the future?"

We stared at each other. Was she saying this was OK? Then she tried to stop from smirking. I started to giggle. She started to giggle. Then we both started to laugh to the point she had to hold her stomach. Then she became serious again. "You are very clearly upset about the fact that you enjoyed being spanked? Do you want to talk about it?"

"Yes. If you don't mind," I said with some hesitation. "I am so confused. It seems completely against everything I believe in that I would find it arousing. Rob and I seem to be exploring the limits of a lot of sexual activity that I have never considered."

"Like what?" When she saw my continued hesitation, she said, "After all that you have told me, the very least you can do to let me make up for my mistake is to permit me help you as a psychiatrist to understand your confusion. Is it something bad he wants you to do?"

"No, not at all. But I have discovered - oh God, this so embarrassing." I stopped to take a deep breath. "I never dreamed I would enjoy anal stimulation, and I suspect I am going to have anal intercourse with him at least once. And, I have never given oral sex to a man, at least never let him come in my mouth. Despite my initial revulsion to the idea, I want to try it, given how much we both enjoy his bringing me to orgasm that way."

Dr. Wolnieki thought for a moment, then began. "Oral and anal sex are sometimes used by men to abuse or subjugate women. If that is his purpose, and a woman engages in behaviour like that because she feels obliged to do so, that is not healthy, nor is it the basis for a loving relationship. It will only drive you apart."

She continued. "Many women enjoy fellatio. They do it for the same reasons their husbands enjoy cunnilingus, as a way to make love to their partners. Though men have a different, more powerful motivation. Many men very much enjoy cunnilingus for themselves. Nature didn't give us that scent or taste for just any reason - it sets off endorphins in the male mind and is often very arousing to men."

I considered her comments for a moment, "I have always been hesitant to have any man ejaculate in my mouth Professor. It seems like I would be swallowing snot."

"Not at all Jennifer. Feces, urine and mucous are all substances that are mediums used to eject toxins from the body. They smell and look foul for a reason - it's nature's way of ensuring that early humans would not ingest or remain exposed to these excretions. Semen is designed to create life and has a very mild taste. In fact, many women quite like the taste," she finished with what turned into a small grin on her face.

I hesitated, then asked, "What about anal play and intercourse."

"Well," said the professor, "more and more younger women are engaging in anal intercourse. Too often though, it is because their boyfriends' pressure them into doing so. I do not have to explain to you that the rectum was designed only to act as an ejection shute, and the anus only to open in concert with a bowel movement. Unless the woman can relax and actually wants to experience anal intercourse, most find it horrifically painful because if they are tense, the anus cramps and then the pain can be overwhelming when forcing a cramped muscle to release."

"But when women are willing? I asked.

"Some women say they really enjoy it. I think this is because of a number of factors. Like spanking, sodomy is regarded as "bad" or a "taboo" behaviour, certainly not done by "good girls". That makes it arousing when the woman is playing a role, rather than experiencing something bad under compulsion or force. Good people often find enjoyment in privately doing something they would never otherwise do because it is "wrong". Can you imagine asking your mom if its ok to engage in this kind of behaviour? It may also be the most intimate and trusting you can be with a man. The point is this: Where there is no abuse and free will, anything sexual between you and Rob is completely open and fair game if you both consent and enjoy it."

Finally, Dr. Wolnieki concluded with what I still regard as incredibly wise advice. "Love making isn't about "fucking". It should be playtime for two consenting adults. It is more than the physical act - it's attitude, it's giving as well as receiving, it's about using your mind, your words, your touch to have fun, create desire, lust and a need to do it again and again with the one you love."

I let her wisdom sink in for a moment. "Can I come and talk with you again sometime?" I asked. "You have no idea how much relief I feel after talking to you about this."

"Of course," she replied. "But don't ask me about involving others, she said laughing. "That is to my mind completely fucked up and only leads to a very unhealthy relationship."

And so began a friendship that has lasted to this day.

******

I was still living with my roommate Laura during the week. Every night Rob and I would agree to stop studying about 9. We would either talk on the phone, or he might pick me up so that we could have a coffee and doughnut at Tim Horton's before he took me back to my apartment. I never said anything to him about my talk with Dr. Wolnieki in our daily conversations after talking with Dr. Wolnieki.

As had become our practise, Rob picked me up at my apartment Friday about six o'clock to spend the weekend with him. We had decided that we would treat ourselves to a dinner out at well known Italian restaurant- after all, we were dating.

While we waited in line for the female Maitre'D to assign us a table, I turned to Rob and moved close for a hug. I had spent the week pondering the advice of Dr. Wolnieki that there should be no limits to our lovemaking and the importance of creating desire. Instead of kissing him, I whispered into his ear, "After dinner Cowboy, I expect you to do a proper job of eating my pussy for dessert. If you do, maybe I will let you fuck me hard and long afterwards." I then brushed the palm of my hand over the front of his pants to feel his hardening cock. As I placed a soft kiss upon his cheek, I turned to see a somewhat shocked hostess who stuttered out, "If you are ready, will follow me please?" My smiling at her did nothing to help her regain her composure.

As Rob plied me with lots of Chianti, I decided my pre-game warm up wasn't quite finished. With my right shoe off, I spent dinner caressing his legs with my stockinged foot and trying to mix our conversation with as many sexual double entendre's that I could manage. As Rob drove us back to his condo after dinner, I boldly leaned into his lap, undid his belt and zipper, and began to stroke his cock with my left hand until Rob yelled, "Enough, I can't drive while you do that".

When we got back to his condo, we were alone in the elevator. Rob slammed my back against the elevator car wall as we rose to his floor, driving his tongue into my mouth and placing his hand under my sweater, squeezing my breast. When the door opened, we practically ran the distance to his condo. As he opened the door to let me in, I threw my winter coat on the floor, hauled off my boots and ran into his bedroom where I stripped down as quickly as I could. Climbing onto the middle of the bed, I lewdly spread my legs as Rob watched me while taking his time to undress. I was going to blow his mind.

Reaching down between my legs, I began to rub up and down the slit of my pussy, over my clitoris. Dipping one, then two fingers into my cunt while looking Rob right in the face, I said, "Oh God, I am so wet." Then I proceeded to take my two fingers and put them into my mouth to lick off my own juices. Never breaking eye contact, I said, "I think dessert is ready to be served".

Rob's eyes were wide, and his breathing rapid. He stood in front of me, slowly stroking his cock. I had never of course seen a man masturbate, and watching this incredible hunk slowly jerking himself off, I thought I would come just from excitement alone.

Staring at me, Rob said, "Do that again, Jennifer".

Never breaking eye contact, I again put two fingers into my cunt, moving them in and out while I played my thumb over my very aroused clit. Closing my eyes, I leaned back onto the bed and started to moan as I masturbated in front of my man. Knowing that I was blowing his mind was the impetus for a very strong, and as was becoming too often the case, loud orgasm.

I lay back, legs spread, an open invitation. Instead of starting to eat me out, Rob pounced between my open legs and drove his cock into my cunt. His mouth on mine, our tongues battling, he grabbed my ass with both his hands and drove into me, harder and harder until he let out a huge grown.

"Don't come, I'm almost there," I screamed, but Rob couldn't hold off, slamming into me. Instead of collapsing on top of me as he usually did, Rob ensured I had that second orgasm. He quickly scooted down, began sucking my clitoris as hard as he could while hammering two of his very large fingers in and out of my cunt until I yelled in release.

******

Was it too much wine the night before or was the deep sleep a result of our intense lovemaking? Whatever the reason, I found myself awaking alone Saturday morning to find it was past 9 a.m. As I lay back marvelling at having enjoyed more than nine hours of uninterrupted sleep, I could hear Rob in the kitchen. Putting on my robe, I walked out of the bedroom to be greeted by a hug, a kiss and a fresh cup of coffee. Rob and I had made plans to get out early that morning to get our respective weekly grocery shopping done - we still maintained our own places Sunday night to Friday afternoon when I moved into the spacious condo Rob's grandfather owned overlooking the Saskatchewan River and university. As I sat there sipping my coffee, Rob headed for the shower.

Running soapy hands over Rob's tight bod in the shower was something I was almost always up for. After he was through washing his hair, I stepped in and embraced him from behind. Grabbing his bar of soap, I lathered him up, back and front and proceeded to use both hands to feel his slippery chest, back, ass and his now hard cock. "I think we need to make this part nice and clean after it was buried in your dirty girlfriend last night", I said with a grin on my face.

Rob proceeded to reciprocate by washing me, first soaping my back, ass and the back of my legs. Then turning me around and nestling his hard cock just above the crack of my ass, he soaped me from neck to pussy. He then caressed both of my breasts until the nipples were hard and taught before ensuring my tummy and labia were equally clean.

The shower stall in this luxury condo's ensuite was huge: 3 and a half feet wide, and nearly 6 feet in length with a heated bench across the back. I had hoped for some actual lovemaking under the water, but after getting me aroused, Rob said, "Hold those thoughts until this afternoon", whereupon he got out of the shower and left me to wash my hair and cope with my unfinished arousal. I thought I might coax him back in as I began to play with my breasts and pussy, but instead all he did was wink at me through the shower stall glass and leave the bathroom to get dressed. As he left, Rob called out, "Now stop that and be a good girl, 'cause you know what might happen to you if you are bad again". I am sure I said something quite rude in reply.

The morning sky was beautiful and clear, and in late February, the temperature promised to go above freezing. After leaving our respective food purchases in the trunk of Rob's car, we proceeded to spend the early afternoon walking through the park trails along the river. It wasn't until after 3 o'clock that we returned to his apartment after dropping my supplies off at my apartment. As Rob was unloading his grocery bags, I nonchalantly said, "I have been holding that thought since our shower. Is there something you would like to do about that?"

"Sure", said Rob. "I was hoping that there might be some left over dessert from last night." Taking me in his arms, he began to softly kiss my throat, cheeks and tenderly lick my ears, while caressing my back. Then his hands went up the back of my sweater to undo my bra. As I lifted my arms, Rob relieved me of all of the clothing on my upper body. Then it was my turn to do the same to him.

We stood there in Rob's living room, his large windows open to the world, making out and naked from the waist up as we basked in the warmth of the late winter sun magnified through the glass. Rob placed both hands on each of my breasts and gently circled the nipples with the palms of his hands until they were hard nubs. Rob told me how much he loved me as he showed me with his hands. Releasing my breasts, his left hand went for the snap and zipper of my jeans while his right hand pulled down my jeans to my knees. With his left hand holding my butt, we continued to kiss, our tongues gently caressing their counterpart while his right hand gently rubbed the small of my back. Then Rob broke our kiss, got down on one knee and helped me step out of my jeans. Leaving my socks on, he picked me up, cradling me in his arms, mine wrapped around his neck, and carried me to the bedroom where he gently laid me out onto his duvet cover. Kneeling between my legs, Rob then began to firmly rub my breasts and upper body with his hands, telling me to close my eyes and to let him pleasure me. Unconsciously, I began to gently raise my hips up and down, inviting him to explore my pussy. Taking the hint, Rob moved further down the bed and lowered his lips to my tummy.