The House of Fun
Way back in the mid 1980's I had the time of my life.
I was in my mid-twenties, living on my own in a Council flat that was just behind the Town Centre and became nicknamed 'The House of Fun' after the Madness song; and working in a furniture shop that had a separate 'electricals' department selling TV's, stereos and the like; plus we were the first shops to sell the new fangled video recorders; which quickly gave me a nice little sideline in Pirate Videos.
With access to so many recorders I bootlegged all of the current (and future ) VHS releases and rented them out at £1 or £2 a night to an ever expanding group of friends, friends of friends and God knows who else.
Alongside the normal day-to-day movies I also had a truck driving contact who travelled into Europe and began bringing back Porn Videos; which were nearly impossible to get hold of outside London; and therefore enabled me to charge a premium of £5 for two nights or a weekend; and to say that they were popular would be a huge understatement!
Although I worked every Saturday; the weekend started on a Thursday night and a full and fun social life ensued. Without sounding vain; I'm just under six feet tall and naturally slim; at that time I had a moustache and a full head of hair, cut in a 'Bowie/Soulboy Flick'. I always dressed well; and had 'rhythm on the dance-floor' which made me popular with the ladies.
With so much 'low hanging fruit' available on these nights out and with my flat being so close, I had no need for a regular girlfriend and never felt it really necessary to take on 'challenges' with the better looking girls.
One of these "better looking girls" was Diane; who was a couple of years younger than me (19 or 20?) and was the sister of our Accounts Clerk Sandra's best friend Julie.
Julie was actually engaged to a mate of mine; but that didn't stop me fingering her one Saturday night in a shop doorway .... but that wasn't unusual as these nights regularly ended with either a fight or a fuck.
Sandra and Julie were part of a group of young women that me and my friends knew on many levels; some we'd gone to school with, some we'd worked with, some we'd wooed and one or two went on to marry (and divorce); but the golden haired Diane not just being a smidgen younger, was a bit aloof and; although she always dressed very sexily (see through blouses and tight skirts that emphasised her gorgeous arse) only one or two ever tried to get inside her knickers; and they got very publicly shot down in flames.
In early April 1982 my company were opening a new branch in the city centre; about 10 miles from the satellite town where I lived; and I was seconded for a month to help set up the electrical department and then staff it on the run up to Easter.
This meant I had to catch a bus at about 8am, and on the first Monday morning who did I see in the queue but none other than Miss Diane, wearing a short leather jacket over a white uniform and if my eyes didn't deceive me, because of the wrinkle around one of her ankles; was wearing stockings. We nodded our recognition but had to sit a couple of seats apart, so couldn't never spoke; although she did look back over her shoulder and smile when we made eye contact.
As we walked out of the bus station, she was right next to me.
"I don't normally see you here." Diane piped up as she walked alongside me.
I explained the situation with the new shop and she genuinely seemed interested; and when asked told me she was a receptionist for a dentist in the financial district.
I was even more surprised when she asked what time I finished work, and when I told her she smiled and said; "I'll probably see you then. Bye."
I was busy all day and forgot about our conversation; so was a bit stunned when she was waiting outside the shop as I left at about 5.15.
On the journey home Diane was a lot friendlier and chattier than I'd ever have expected; making me believe that she was actually a bit intimidated when out on the town with her sister and her older more gregarious friends.
This carried on all week and by Friday as we got off the bus she even asked if I was going to the Legion Club; aka The Last Chance Ranch that I normally frequented and occasionally saw her there with her sister's friends.
I confirmed that I would be and she responded with a lovely smile.
The club was busier than usual that night; but my mates had secured our normal tables on the balcony, overlooking the dance-floor where we could survey the talent on show.
About an hour after arriving I was mid conversation with my mate Barry when I felt hands ruffle my hair, then slide over and cover my eyes.
"Guess who?" A very distinctive and sexy woman's voice whispered.
Laughing I moved her hands away and my eyes nearly popped out of my head when I saw her, as well as having on sexy bright red lipstick Diane was wearing a virtually transparent chiffon blouse with an even sexier black push-up bra underneath; and for me, more importantly was obviously wearing very fine denier black seamed stockings under a tight pencil skirt.
"Do you want a drink?" I asked as I quickly stood up and guided her away from the table, where my mates were laughing and grunting.
The noise from the disco meant I had to bend down close to hear her; and her perfume smelled bloody lovely. A song came on that I liked came on so we put down our drinks and had a couple of dances before she was beckoned back to her sister's table at about 9.30, and much to my disappointment they all began finishing their drinks and putting their coats on before marching, en masse out of the ballroom.
The night wore on with my mates wanting to know 'how what had just happened, happened'; 'how come Princess Pricktease was suddenly on my radar!' and also taking the piss about me 'missing out on shagging the Ice Princess' and stuff like that.
I laughed it all off; but I was in a three week slump and really thought I was 'in'.
In some ways The Ranch was a bit like the Serengeti with 'big cats' like me and my mates looking for a sexy wildebeest or zebra to peel away from the herd and we would move in for the metaphorical 'kill.'
About 15 minutes later, and being unable to take any more of my friends' piss taking I went to the toilet, and as I came out a married woman who I'd known for years, called Kelly was coming out of the ladies toilets at the same time.
"Hello sexy," I greeted her, "You are looking hot tonight."
"You're not too shabby yourself." Kelly grinned.
I eased her against the corridor wall and with my hand on her hip we chatted for a couple of minutes; including her chiding me for not 'looking her in the eyes' as I was staring at her very visible and large cleavage which her denim dress, with a press-stud or two too many open did very little to hide.
I pretended to apologise, but told her 'that terrific boobs like hers needed to be admired by a connoisseur.'
Which made her laugh.
"Fancy coming back to mine so I can get a better look."
Judy made the cardinal mistake of taking too long to answer; so I moved in ..... "Get your coat .... you've pulled!" Which made her giggle again.
"Where do you live?" She nervously whispered.
GOAL!
"The flats next to the fire station ...... two minutes away".
She checked her watch, "I have to be home on the last bus ...... by 11.30."
She thought out loud.
"I can work with that." I whispered as I nuzzled her ear lobe; "I will make sure Cinderella is home by midnight."
Kelly was quite pretty with a cute small and turned up nose; and must have been an absolute stunner in her younger days; but was now what my Mother would call "A bottle blonde, but one that should have used a bigger bottle!"
Thankfully she didn't have a coat to retrieve; so I quickly led her away from any suspicious friends and off into the night.
While I'd vaguely known her face for years, I only really got to know her when she came into the shop a year or so previously, husband and kids in tow to buy a new TV and video; and over the following weeks chatted and flirted with her when she paid the weekly instalments and again on irregular Friday nights at the Ranch.
Horny as fuck because of Diane's transformation I couldn't wait to get this MILF into my bed. As we hurriedly walked along the back street I slid my hand up the back of her dress and found she was wearing tights, so groped her nylon covered arse, which made her giggle and snuggle closer into my shoulder.
It had always been apparent that Kelly and her friends weren't really on my agenda; as all or most were older than me and my mates; plus they were mostly married.
Neither of which would normally put us off, but they just went to the club for a drink and a dance and to 'blow off steam'; yet it wasn't altogether out of the question for one of them, called Carole to slip out of the back for a knee trembler in the car park.
As soon as we were through the door I pinned Kelly up against the wall and forcefully kissed her as I pulled at the top of her denim dress and tugged; making the press studs pop open all the way to the hem,
After openly admiring her bounteous body for a few seconds I ran my hand up the back of her dress until I found her bra straps, then flicked my finger and thumb opening it up.
Grinning, I then pulled her large floppy tits out of her thin yellow bra, immediately suckling on her long pink nipples as I stroked her arse again; making her purr and grope my arse.
"You don't hang about, do you???" She chuckled as I slid a hand to the front of her tights and stroked between her legs, which instantly made her spread her legs.
"Bedroom or sofa?" I grunted.
"Bedroom." She sighed as I roughly pressed her tights and knickers into her pussy with my fingers.
She now had her dress and bra off when we went through the bedroom door and was about to pull her tights down but I stopped her.
"No .... don't." I grinned "Leave them on."
She looked confused until I pushed her down on the bed and began kissing her feet and rubbing my face up and down her nylon covered legs; roughly squeezing her tits at the same time. Eventually I moved up to the bullseye, which felt red hot as I kissed and licked it through two layers of cheap nylon, which made her shuffle and wiggle.
A minute or two later I sensuously pulled her tights and knickers down to her knees; admiring the view of her glistening slit in the middle of a black pubic forest as I did so.
Kelly looked nervously apprehensive at this stage; "I've you know .... never ..... you know I'm married ..... just .... you know ..... this is my first time, with another man ..... I'm not a slag .... you know that, don't you."
I winked and blew a kiss as I desperately tried not to laugh or snigger, as in my drunken state she looked like a 3D relief map of Africa; with two mountains at the top then her birth stretch marks looked like rivers running down into a forest of pubes!!
Presumably unused to extra-marital sex Judy kept her eyes closed as I lifted her legs up by the knees then pushed them back towards her magnificent big floppy tits; burying my face in her sopping fanny.
"Ooooohhhh ....aaaaggghh ....... oh Hell .....yes, yes.... YES!"
