Next time I’ll check the memo.
I hate memos. They never say anything. There’s usually a dozen a day to read, sort, and file.
And they get lost.
That’s what I did with the Halloween memo. Actually, I probably threw it away. Without reading it.
If I had read it, it would have reminded me of the annual Halloween costume event at work. Everyone was to wear a costume. There would be a costume contest. And trick or treating.
Like I said, I never read it. So I dressed in my usual shirt, tie, and jacket and went to work.
I like to get to work early. There are fewer phone calls. And without the rest of the staff there, it is quieter. I was sitting at my desk in peaceful, and ignorant, bliss, when Carol, my secretary entered my office.
“What are you supposed to be?” she asked.
“Hard at work. And you are …?” I really needed to ask. Carol is thirty and was dressed as a cross between a Playboy bunny and a devil. She had a tight, low cut black leotard with a long red tail and horns. And hose. Fishnet stockings, which encased her luscious legs. She has a nice body that she usually hides under layers of clothes and bulky sweaters. There was nothing left to the imagination today.
“I’m a devil, silly. But you’re not wearing a costume.”
“I didn’t know ….”
“Memo number 03-645, Halloween festivities, which stated that we were supposed to dress up for the holiday. You know, one of those management things to build rapport and make us think it’s a great company.”
“Well, I missed that one. I’ll get it next year.”
“Oh, no. We’re judged as a department, and if everyone doesn’t have a costume, then the whole department is disqualified.”
“Well, like I said, there’s always next year.”
“Look, I didn’t dress like some sleazy she-devil to wait till next year. The winning department goes to Cancun and you’re not ruining it for us. Or for me. So you will be wearing a costume today.”
“Okay.” Great.
“So it’s time to make you a costume. Let’s see. I need your earpiece for your cell phone, sunglasses, and a pen cap.”
Who was I to argue? It seemed easy enough. And the quicker I got her out of the room, the sooner I could get to work. I assembled the required parts and sat back.
“Okay, Mark, we’re going to make you into a Secret Service Agent. A few quick changes ….”
Carol took the earpiece and moved close to me. I felt her breath on my neck and her breasts push against my back as she placed the earpiece in my ear and then ran the wire down my back. She placed the pen cap on lapel like a microphone. Then she put the glasses in place.
“Something’s missing.” She left the room and returned a few minutes later with a blue blazer. “Bill in purchasing will never miss it. He’s a scarecrow today. Pretty lame one at that.”
She walked around to me and slipped the jacket over my arms. She stood in front of me, brushing her hands along my shoulders, tugging at the sleeves. “You’ve been working out, haven’t you?”
“You look great,” she said. She laughed, a deep sexy laugh, as she adjusted her impromptu props on me. “We need just one more thing”
She pushed against me with her hip to gain access to my computer. The warmth of her body was nice as she leaned against me. Her thigh rested against my hand. It was warm and smooth. I was tempted to caress it, but reality slapped me in the head and I pulled my hand back. I could swear she was rubbing her butt against my crotch.
“We need to get you a badge.” She accessed my employment file and with a few keystrokes had a mock-up of a Government ID badge complete with picture. She printed the sheet and before I knew it had fashioned a badge to pin to my lapel.
“You look so cool. Just like those guys guarding the President. Se you later.” She rubbed her hand on my thigh as she left me.
It must have been the day or the costume or getting me to look likes some bureaucratic geek that was making her act this way. Carol normally was the most conservative and efficient person in the office. But that day, she was, well, flighty.
A few hours later she stopped by again, looking better and better as the she devil. “The judges will be here in a few minutes. They’re going room to room. Where are your treats?”
“Treats?”
“Candy, gum, whatever you were planning on giving out today.”
“I didn’t know …”
“That you were supposed to bring treats. You know Mark, for a smart guy, you can be dense. Now, you owe me for this. Big time.”
She reached into a sack and pulled out a small bowl filled with boxes of raisins and nuts. As she arranged the bowl on my desk I peered down her blouse and swore I saw her breasts.
“What do I owe you?” I said as I reached for my wallet.
