Call me Edward. Or if you really want to know me, call me Edward the Confessor. Not to confuse me with the pious English monarch. I mean confessor like the priests who hear confession. But unlike kings or priests, I don't help people absolve themselves of their sins, I help them indulge.
I'm an otherwise average looking guy -- decent enough looks, generally sociable, but never really the life of the party. But what my special skill is making people, especially women, feel comfortable enough to confess things they might otherwise not. I can't explain the gift, but I've learned how to use it.
I have many stories, and this is but one of them. Well, one series of stories, which all starts thanks to
Girls Gone Wild
.
#
Chapter 1: MILFS Gone Wild
I was born at the divide of the Millennial/Gen Z generations. The year I was born was when
Girls Gone Wild
came out, and the series had shut down, under legal and other issues, before I was old enough to see the ubiquitous late-night ads. I was aware of it, in the sense that anyone is aware of old TV shows or other media from prior generations.
Videos from then circulate around the tube sites, but I didn't watch my first one until college, when I had a part time job at one of the video stores that still hung on thanks to a dedicated local film community and its exhaustive selection that Netflix couldn't match. Like all Mom-and-Pop video shops, there was the back room behind the beaded curtain where the porn was. Along with the new titles, they kept a backlog of classic porn films for the aficionados of old men who weren't tech savvy, didn't have broadband, or preferred the old ways. I would of course take some home with me, out of mere curiosity. I found a few
Girls Gone Wild
DVDs, and even some VHS ones. Luckily I had an old VCR and could watch them. I liked them well enough, and laughed at how many young men going to college probably thought this was what it was going to be like all the time.
I graduated, moved on, and didn't think too much about it. Until I went to a business conference out of state to a new city.
#
I've always had a thing for older women, and luckily that has been reciprocated. This isn't an exclusive thing, but my confessor skill has led to many an older woman being able to confess to things that they have done, could have done but didn't, or wish they had the chance to do. Every older generation starts to get to the point where they think the younger generation is doing all the sex that they didn't get to do when they were younger.
Tonight's older woman was across the hotel bar. We made eye contact and I knew we were going to sleep together. I could already tell from her look she was desperately single, and probably a divorcee. She had that Mom air to her. Whatever kids she had no doubt made dating hard, and this business getaway was her chance to just get laid without worrying about logistics. I was more than happy to oblige her needs.
I went over and we got to talking. Her name was Julie. After the ice breakers we slipped easily into flirting, I made a risque comment about the low cut of her blouse.
"You'd never guess that I was the daughter of a pastor," Julie said.
"I might have to praise your maker for his work," I said.
"You wouldn't be the first to exclaim 'Dear God' when you see them," Julie said.
When she said that, something clicked in my mind. I had a mild sense of familiarity with her, but I had originally chalked it up to her being the type of woman I had slept with before. But suddenly the line "Dear God" brought me back to the video store, to a copy of the
Girls Gone Wild
back catalog. There was a young co-ed with ample breasts who is goaded into flashing the camera. As soon as she does it, a homeless man walking by shouts "Dear God!" before crossing himself.
That was Julie. And she was here in front of me!
But I don't say anything right away. No matter how innocent it is, recalling porn in perfect clarity is a turn off. Besides, as a rule, the confessor's best move is to let your companion be the one to lead the confession. They want to unburden, and like a good strip club patron you need to let them expose themselves at their own pace.
"I would be happy to join this congregation," I said.
She looked at me, and not seeing any judgment or hint of knowledge of her secret, relaxed and leaned in.
"If I told you a secret, could you keep it?"
"I can. I'm quite good at it, too good to give you any references," I said.
She laughed and put a hand on my arm.
"Have you heard of
Girls Gone Wild
?" she asked.
"Sure. A bit before my time, but I remember seeing the ads on the old episodes of South Park my cousin recorded," I said.
"Well I... I don't think starred is the word, but I was featured in one of those videos," Julie said.
"So, you had a small brush with fame?" I asked.
"More like infamy," Julie said, "It's not something I like to tell many people."
"I'm honored to be among the few," I said.
"I wish 'like' could be the word for it. If it had turned out better, maybe," she said.
"What's the story behind it?" I asked.
She sipped her drink before beginning her story.
#
Like I said, I was born a pastor's daughter. For the most part I was well behaved, but I obviously had the normal desires. My parents weren't the worst of the conservative religious types. No purity balls and all that. But the no sex until marriage thing was held up high, and the town I grew up in was small enough that I couldn't get away with sneaking out, meeting up with boys, or even things like smoking weed and not have someone spot me and notify my parents.
My parents wanted me to go to the Christian college where they met, but I convinced them the local state college was a better choice. It wasn't the big party school in the state, it barely ran a tailgate at the Division II football games. It was chaste by most college standards, but for me it represented freedom.
Obviously when I went there I went wild. Again, based on my terms. I felt dirty buying a pack of cigarettes, even if I only smoked half of them before giving up the habit. Hookah was more fun, since it was socially done in mixed company and there were a few guys bold enough to use it to flirt and blow smoke in my mouth, before turning it to making out.
I was slow to drinking, thinking I was being responsible. But what I wasn't ready for was when my roommate invited me to Spring Break. Her mother worked for an airline and her uncle owned a condo in Miami he was willing to let her use.
I wasn't ready for Miami, not really. Hell, I brought a one-piece swimsuit! Luckily my friend was more than happy to help me choose more appropriate attire.
We went bar hopping on fake IDs. I had mostly sipped cheap beer and wine coolers, so I was not used to the sweeter liquor drinks. I was drunk off my ass before long.
My friend and I walked out of the bar, and heard some cheering going on. We see these guys with cameras out and think they might be MTV. I had only just started watching it, and this was back when it was mostly music and their Spring Break coverage. We decided to head over, thinking there might be a celebrity.
Girls Gone Wild
had not come out yet, they were still in their collection phase. So when we got there and saw girls lifting up their tops, we had no context for it.
Between the drink and the novelty, I didn't have a real idea of what was going on. What I knew was a lot of hot guys were cheering for those girls, and I was still a virgin and deeply wanting male attention.
So when the guys spotted me and my friend they turned the cameras our way.
"Hey babe," the camera man shouted, "Why don't you show us what you got?"
Again, being so naive, I thought he just meant for us to dance sexy. And 'sexy' for a sheltered white girl means cringey everywhere else. We got a few laughs, but I was too drunk to know the difference.
"What about your top?" the cameraman asked.
I looked down at my top and grabbed my boobs. That got the right reaction from the camera guys, so I jiggled my boobs a bit. This tiny bit of exhibitionism gave me a real thrill.
"Take your top off, show us what you got!" the camera man said.
I knew what he wanted, and I was nervous. Not because of the camera or anything, it was because I wasn't comfortable yet with thinking I was sexy enough for guys. But the cheers from several guys and some women got me encouraged, so untied my top and showed my tits.
This homeless guy walking by yelled "Dear God!" and I laughed. I felt a little sexual power at that moment.
Newbie that I was, somehow I got the idea to jump up and down to let my tits bounce. It was really fun in the moment, and when my friend joined in I was having the time of my life. I had no attraction to her, but I liked sharing the moment with her tits out. The cameraman was trying to get us to kiss, but we turned him down.
One of the girls he had just been filming, she must have been jealous and ran into the frame for more attention.
[I suppressed a smile. I only gave you readers only a partial description of the video. There was more. I'll let her tell this story].
"Play with each other's tits!" the cameraman said.
I was too nervous about that, still grossed out by the lesbian thing. But the other girl went and grabbed both our tits, and was really mugging for the camera. I was hoping she would leave, but then the camera man told her to make out. She moved in on me, but I put a hand up to block her, but that left my chest open. She leaned in and licked both my nipples for the camera, and started sucking on the left one.
I was shocked! Too shocked to realize how aroused I actually was. I push her away and put my top on.
A producer comes by with a release to sign. Now I was drunk, so I shouldn't have been able to sign anything. I tried to read it in the dark, but the guy said just sign. He offered us free drink tickets to a nearby bar, and being naive and drunk, I just signed, took the tickets and we went to have more fun.
Sobered up the next morning, I regretted the decisions, and was confused about the arousal from having my tits licked, but I hoped it would just be some local pervert's personal porn stash.
It wasn't until junior year that I was even aware that
Girls Gone Wild
was a thing. I learned from a guy friend, who asked if I had ever been in Miami on Spring Break. He said a frat brother had the video and they were all watching, and he recognized me.
He was a nice enough guy, and if he had just asked me, maybe it wouldn't have been so bad. But he was so excited to see me in it that he blurted it out. Soon, a whole frat of guys knew a girl from their school was in a porn tape. The whole point of watching the tape together was to try and plan their own sort of party where they hoped they could get girls to show off their tits and make out. I became a fetish object for them, and it was gross and possessive. It went beyond them and spread across campus.
We didn't have the word incel then, but some angsty incel, who I had never even met, let alone turned down, felt the need to call my parents and let them know. That caused a whole host of issues for years.
#
I nodded when she was done with her story.
"That's terrible how it ended," I said, "I wish you could have enjoyed it as much as when you did it."
"You know, I really wish I could have. I did get a thrill from exhibition. I even thought about doing nude modeling for art classes. And of course the arousal from the random girl licking my tits, along with the permissive pro-gay atmosphere, got me considering trying stuff out. But the outing really hurt me for a while after," Julie said.
I took her hand.
"I hope you did get to explore some of your interests," I said.
"I did eventually have a fling with a woman," Julie said.
"And you could still make a great nude model," I said.
She blushed a bit.
"You haven't seen me nude yet," she said.
