A fine shiver raced up Kat's spine, and she knew it was more from the darkness that clung to the curves of the hiking trail than the autumn air that was far too cool for the Capri yoga pants and cropped tank that was her running outfit. Overhead, Spanish moss draped from the boughs of ancient trees, casting shifting shadows, and she questioned once more the intelligence of being here. The silence was broken only by the whispering step of her well-worn sandals on the dirt ground. There was not the usual crowd of joggers and nature wanderers that usually frequented Kat's favorite running haunt. Then again, she usually did not come here in the dead of night.
She startled at the sound of a cracking branch, and calmed only slightly when a stray cat emerged from the thick brush to whisk across her path.
What the heck was she doing here? She knew better than to listen to her friend, Danni, but at the time her words seemed to make perfect sense.
"You need to break out of your routine, Kat. Every day is the same! You get up, you jog, you have a yogurt for breakfast, you go to work and let that slimy-little-cretin-of-a-boss dump all his responsibilities on your plate, you come home, you watch Law and Order while you eat dinner, and then you go to bed. What kind of life is that?"
So here she was, one o'clock in the morning, pretending to be jogging while her heart was thudding with nervous anticipation, thinking that her routine really hadn't been all that bad. Was it?
Kat slowed as the woods opened to a small meadow. She stepped from the paved path, summer browned grass crunching beneath her feet, and made her way to one of several picnic benches that was lit by the feeble glow of a half moon. For a moment, she let herself enjoy the rarely seen sight of stars uncounted, usually concealed by the city's powerful illumination.
Her eyes dropped as another snapping branch disturbed the stillness of the night. In the heavy wood before her, a shadow moved in the darkness. It was not the slight movement of a small wood creature; the presence was large, yet graceful in its movements as it slid from the gloom of the trees. She froze as her uncertain nervousness quickly soared to panic, and as the man advanced on her with silent intent, Kat knew that she could blame no one but herself for creating this situation.
"You need to break out of your routine, Kat. Every day is the same! You get up, you jog, you have a yogurt for breakfast, you go to work and let that slimy-little-cretin-of-a-boss dump all his responsibilities on your plate, you come home, you watch Law and Order while you eat dinner, and then you go to bed. What kind of life is that?"
"Well, geeze, Danni, why don't you tell me how you really feel."The sarcasm on her tongue soothed the sting of her friend's words, but the truth behind them bruised her already aching heart.
Danni closed her eyes and sighed. "I'm sorry, Kat. I know that was rather brutal," she opened her eyes, and caught Kat's hand in hers, "but I'm trying to be honest here. Just because he left you doesn't mean your life is over. Jake..."
"Jake," Kat said with a harshness that spoke volumes of the pain she had been carrying in her for the past few months, "didn't just leave because he didn't love me anymore, Danni. He told me... he said that it was like being with a corpse! That I was so unmoving and cold that it was a wonder that he hadn't found someone else sooner. He said..."
"Screw what Jake said. He's a moron who couldn't even get a job. I couldn't figure out what the heck you were doing with him anyway." Danni cupped Kat's face in her hands so that she was forced to look at her. "You are the least cold person I have ever met. Why do you think I hang out with you? Whenever I start feeling myself being jaded by the people I defend in court every day, I know I need a big dose of Kat. Five minutes after being with you, and your warmth and optimism helps me remember that I'm not my mother! Talk about cold and unmoving..."
Danni bounced from the couch, and pulled Kat to her feet. "What you need is something new to spark your interest, and I've got a great idea." Kat mumbled something derisive about Danni and her "great" ideas as she was pulled along.
The miserable woman was pushed into a chair at the kitchen table, and Danni pulled another up next to her. From her extra large, violent purple purse, she took out her small, notebook laptop. After flipping it open and booting it up, she typed in a few words and up popped a dating website.
"Oh, please. You can't possibly be serious."
"I am! You can meet a few guys on here, go out on a date or two, and remember what life was like BJTA."
"'BJTA?'"
"Before Jake the Ass." The two women giggled, and Kat felt better for it. For a lawyer, Danni wasn't always the most tactful friend, but she had the most giving heart Kat had ever known. "Anyway, since I know you won't do it, I already made your profile for you; a bio, your habits, hobbies... that kind of stuff." Danni cut over Kat's protests to add, "All you have to do to finish it is put in what kind of guy and relationship you want."
"Who said I wanted a relationship? I'm not ready to do this all over again. I don't want to date, or fall in love, or get married."
"Who says you have to?" Danni reached for the wireless mouse and clicked a few times, bringing up a screen that asked about relationship preferences. The list was rather staggering: pen pals, friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, lovers, marriage, ménage a trois, open relationships, fuck buddy. "Maybe all you need is a new friend, but I honestly think, and I mean this in the nicest way possible, that you need to get laid."
She selected "Fuck Buddy," hit the submit button, and up popped another screen. There, with pictures attached, were hundreds of men who all wanted the same thing: SEX. No strings attached, wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am fucking that required no emotions at all whatsoever beyond pleasure. Unable to help herself, Kat quickly scanned the first few men that the small screen allowed her to see without having to scroll down.
Each picture was followed by a raunchy screen name, age, sex, and general location. Below was a small bio, where the men quickly described, in the most base and simplistic vocabulary possible, what kind of fuck buddy they were looking for.
Kat read the first one out loud, hoping to dissuade her friend by the vulgarity of its words. "'If u want a hung stud to ride 2nite, then I am ur man. 10 in. long, and thick. Don't bother if ur a dog. I only fuck hot chicks. Big titties a must.' Well, there you go. The perfect man for me."
Danni rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically. "Don't you get it, Kat? The idea is that none of these guys are the perfect guy. You won't be taking any of them home to meet your parents. This," she jabbed a finger at the screen, "is your chance at living your fantasy rather than the crappy life you've dug yourself into. You can escape reality with one of these guys, be whoever you want to be, do whatever you've wanted to do. Trust me, whatever the fantasy you've got hidden inside you, there will be a hundred guys willing and happy to oblige."
Kat was slammed back into the reality of the cold night as the man's rumbling deep voice spoke. "You must be Jessamine."
Kat had originally chosen the alias to protect herself, but quickly realized the anonymity of using a name that was not her own gave her a sense of freedom and power that became part of her fantasy. She was no longer herself, cold and unmoving as a corpse. The woman who responded to the online requests to be her personal fuck buddy was not the same woman who stuck to the same, dull routine for the past eight months. She wasn't even the warm, optimistic friend Danni thought her to be. Jessamine was bold and in control of her desires. She was wanton and promiscuous, and was willing to use any man for her own pleasure.
As the man neared, she saw that he was as he promised: well above six feet tall, and heavily muscled. The moon cast just enough light to see that his face was the same in his profile picture. It wasn't a face that most would call handsome. It was a hard face, with sharp lines and thin lips. She knew, without being able to see, that his eyes were a blue so light that they almost appeared to be colorless. His hair did not soften his appearance any; his onyx black hair was shaved so short that he would pass for military muster.
Despite the strength and hardness of his appearance, his voice was like honey. It was deep and smooth, with the sound of the south in it, in an oddly cultured kind of way. The way he spoke the name "Jessamine" evoked a sense of silk running over her naked body. Suddenly, Kat was no longer Kat. She was Jessamine. Her unease and fear was replaced by confidence and lust.
"You must be Devon." Kat wondered if he had the same need as she to be someone unlike herself. Jessamine thought the man was just as delicious and dangerous looking as she had hoped him to be.
