Staying in Character

My name is Karen Walker and my husband's name is Jim. We have been married for twelve years and we have two wonderful boys that we adore. As much as I want to remain a wife and mother, a person has needs outside that life, no matter how fulfilling that life may be. This is the story of the time I conspired to meet a man in a hotel room for sex. I've never told anyone about it and I've never been able to decide if I should feel guilty or embarrassed for what I did; but I do know that every time I think of it I smile.

I'm a working wife and mother. I manage a group of computer programmers in a major insurance company. We move millions of dollars every hour and small mistakes can be devastating. It's a lot of pressure. My husband is an engineer working in a computer company. He needs to stay one step ahead of the competition all the time. Second place is last place in his industry. As a result, we don't always have time for each other. We get home, fix dinner, help the kids with their homework, and collapse into bed exhausted. The next day we get up and do it all over again. I'm not complaining about my life, but there isn't a lot of "me time" and I need it. I need to connect with another human being and it seemed more and more that neither Jim nor I could find the time to connect with one another. I was feeling rejected, unappreciated, and not much of a woman.

That's when it occurred to me that I needed to do something radical, something extreme, something that maybe I couldn't tell anyone about. I called a man I know, and I asked him to have lunch with me. It was just lunch. There was nothing to be embarrassed about. There was nothing to hide. It was just two people sitting down at a table to talk and eat, but I needed it.

I left lunch feeling rejuvenated and a little guilty. I could have eaten at my desk and worked on the next project coming down from above. I could have gone out with some of the women from the office, but I chose to have lunch with a man and for just 45 minutes I felt like a woman who'd left all her cares behind. I knew I had to do it again.

That weekend was like every other weekend; Jim mowed the lawn and I worked in the garden. The kids had softball and came home excited and energized. I wanted to feel excited and energized. At night I lay with my husband and I knew he loved me and I loved him; I just wasn't excited. I needed a break from the routine and I was starting to feel a little desperate.

The next week I reached out and called my friend again. "How about lunch tomorrow? Same place? Same time?" He said yes and he was looking forward to it. "One thing, let's not tell our spouses about it. It's just lunch and there's nothing to be ashamed of, but they might think it's more than it is."

He hesitated for a moment and when he responded he sounded confused; but eventually he said, "Ok. I guess I can do that."

I had a smile on my face as I hung up and I admit I felt a little naughty about arranging a lunch date when I'm a married woman. Then again, he's a married man, so I guess we were both being a little naughty and it felt good. It was a break in the routine. It was exciting, and it felt like the change I was needing.

Lunch was fun and more exciting than I'd imagined. It was just lunch. We didn't do anything; we just sat together and talked. Although, at one point he looked at me and touched my hand. He said, "It really is a treat to meet you like this. I'd like to do it again."

Oh, that got my motor running! I said that I'd like it, too, and we agreed to meet on Thursday again. There was a spring in my step as I walked back into the office and I thought that everyone who saw me had to know that I'd been up to something. I thought I'd better cool it and try to tone it down, but it was almost impossible not to smile. I felt like a school girl again.

Thursday came, and it was even better than before. We sat and talked. He took my hand and looked into my eyes. It was like we were the only two people in the room and as far as I was concerned we were. I needed this!

We continued to meet at least once and usually twice each week. We'd take off from work long enough to have lunch and spend some time together. It was becoming a regular part of my week and I looked forward to it. Then during the third week of our lunches together he did something that changed us. The week before he had already given me a light peck on the cheek as we left, but this time he drew me to him and gave me a full kiss on the lips. That kiss changed everything. I went back to my office feeling elated and a little confused. Were these innocent lunches going to become something more?

I started dressing a little better on the days I knew I'd see him. When he started commenting on how I was dressed I started thinking that maybe I'd start wearing a little something extra under my work clothes just to feel sexier when I was with him. He didn't need to know. It would be my little secret.

We went on this way for about six weeks. The kisses got better, and the lunches got a little longer. I even bought some secret underwear for the days when we would meet. I knew where this was heading, and I started to plan. I reminded him that this was just between us and that no one needed to know about our lunches together. This meant our spouses as well, especially our spouses. He readily agreed with a smile on his face. He was clearly thinking the same thing I was.

I wanted to take this to the next level. Could I do it? How was I going to do it? I couldn't take an afternoon off from work. I also knew he'd be missed if he did. People would talk; they always do. It seemed like it was all I could think about. When I couldn't stand it any longer I picked up the phone and I called his office. I kept it short and to the point, "This Saturday, 1 PM, the Holiday Inn on Chestnut. Don't call me back, don't talk about it to anyone. If you don't want to come, I understand. If you do, don't say anything to anybody. Don't even say anything to me if you see me. Just be there." I hung up. I had a jumble of nerves and emotions! I was excited, nervous, and I was so hoping he would show. I needed this. I wanted this.

That was Thursday afternoon after our lunch together. I managed to get through the rest of the day, but my heart was racing just thinking about it. Our date was 46 hours away and I didn't know how I was going to behave in a normal manner until then. I went home, fixed dinner for the family, and I tried to act as normal as possible. Jim seemed not to know and it was important that he stay that way.

Saturday came, and I was giddy. I fixed breakfast for the kids while Jim went out to cut the lawn. The kids headed out for softball and I had arranged for them to go to their grandparents' house after the game. I took a long, warm bath, dressed in my sexiest underwear, and put my regular Saturday clothes on over them. I put a sexy little something in my purse, told Jim I was going shopping, and I left for my date. Everything was going great! Everything was going as planned.

I took my time getting to the hotel; I had time to spare. He wouldn't be there until 1:00 and it was only 11:00, so I visited a little coffee shop down the street and had a little bite and a cup to relax. I was feeling excited and nervous at the same time and I was filled with anticipation. I started to worry that maybe I would disappoint him. He's just a man and I'm a woman, but maybe he expects more than I can deliver? I'd never done this before and I was wondering if I could pull it off; but I needed this. I wanted this more than anything and I wanted it to be perfect. I wanted to be the sexiest woman he's ever met. My only real guilt was about ditching the kids for the day, but they would have fun with their grandparents. I never gave a thought to what Jim might be doing at that moment. I was too caught up in my plans for the afternoon.

I checked in and I took a quick shower. All that anticipation had taken its toll. I opened a small bottle of perfume that I bought for the occasion and applied just enough in all the right places for the intimate moments I was hoping to share. I changed into that sexy little something I'd brought with me. I was looking pretty good for an old girl and I was hoping he would approve.

Right at 1:00 there was a knock at the door. I gave a quick look around the room to make sure I'd left nothing thrown about, took a deep breath, and I opened the door. He was standing there with flowers and a bottle of champagne with two glasses. I didn't expect that. I stepped back and invited him in. We were both nervous; but today, here, we were committed to doing this and it had to be magical! We talked a little, and he opened the champagne to pour us each a glass. We smiled and drank a sip. He never took his eyes off me as he said, "You have no idea how beautiful you are." I was too nervous to respond. Then he put his glass on the table, took my glass from me, and he kissed me. The kiss was electric! God, I needed that kiss! I needed this man and I needed to take his breath away! He drew me to him. Slowly I felt his hand slide down my back and I felt him squeezing my bottom.

No more waiting, no more small talk, this was going to happen. I reached down and undid his pants; they fell to the floor. I slipped down to my knees and I pulled his boxers to his ankles. This is what I was waiting for! I wanted this.

I ran my hand up his torso as I stood and stepped back as I watched him step out of his pants and unbutton his shirt. I decided that I would let him undress me, what little I was wearing, so I just stood there and watched him. He never took his eyes off me. He wanted me! I saw it and I felt that everything I'd needed for so long was standing right in front of me.

He removed the last of his clothes. I could see the lust in his eyes as he stepped toward me and opened his arms to hold me. Then he paused. A strange look of confusion came over his face and he said, "Honey, are you sure the kids are ok?"

I picked up a pillow and I hit him with it as hard as I could. I knocked him off his feet and as I stood over him, pointing two fingers at his chest, I said, "Damn it, James, if you can't stay in character we can go home right now!"

I was mad. He looked embarrassed and apologized. I guess that's the price you pay for having a husband who's also a good father, but this was my time and I wanted his full attention.

He stood and said, "I'm sorry. Where were we? Oh, yes, I was about to do this..."

He fell back into character and didn't fail me. For one long and wonderful afternoon I had a delicious affair with my married man. He didn't disappoint me again. In fact, he failed to disappoint me three times that afternoon. At the end we went our separate ways. I got the kids at their grandparents' house and took them home. My husband was preparing dinner on the grill and we all had a quiet evening together. Nothing was said and it was exactly the way I wanted to end my affair.

We've never played this game a second time. The truth is I like spending my Saturdays with all three of my boys and I am always more than happy to check into a hotel with my husband whenever we are traveling. Still, every now and again, my husband will watch me getting ready for bed and say, "You have no idea how beautiful you are." It's a cheesy line, I know, but it works every time. And when I say it works, I mean it really works!