Split Tree Resort Remodeled 02
[The three purple Mini Coopers pull up, single file in the resort's circle driveway and calmly come to a stop and as expected, the three Purple Preppies, Purple Preppie Paula, Purple Preppie Patti and Purple Preppie Piper exit their respective Mini Coopers. Oh, and each has a passenger too]
"[Ding, ding, ding] mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm! But we're not stuck-up bitches, so what?"
"[Tap, tap, tap] hello, I'm Coo-Coo and I'm usually Coo-Coo from the Coco counter in the Community Hut, but today I'm temporarily filling in at the front desk for Twiddle Dee and I've heard that someday I might find the perfect boyfriend date who is Goo-Goo over my teeny Coo-Coo's and that might happen this weekend since I expect the Purple Preppies as Daphne's at the Velma party will have so many casts off that it will be my choice. And since I can already tell that the lovely young ladies behind you are your slightly younger sisters, the pre-preppies, I assume, so, shall I address their needs first, hmm? I have a sticky note that says that would be the polite thing to do, so?"
"Mm-hmm, of course, Coo-Coo and a big shout out to your sticky note content creator and we'll start following him or her right away on social media. And the back story is that we cramp their style and they cramp our style, even though our age gaps are not that big. Anyways, they are all approaching 19 and need shoes money and they rode along to inquire about any possible jobs on the weekends, so, go all 'tap, tap, tap' and say 'thanks, but not at this time' and we'll send home in on of our Mini Coopers, so, go ahead, Coo-Coo get all "tap, tap, tap' and let them down gently. Also, they are the pre preppie CB's, the Cerulean Blue's and nobody is jealous of their color choice, so?"
"[Tap, tap, tap] mm-hmm, since it's Thursday and basically just a staffers bonfire dance party tonight, Bar-B-Que Quinn could use three hamburger runners and they can interview with Twiddle Dee in the morning for other weekend work, so? Also, if it doesn't pan out, the resort recently purchased a passenger cargo van from the airport and we'll get them home safely so you three Purple Preppies don't have to give up one of your cars, so?"
"[Purple Preppie Paula] yeah but, yeah but, but, but our party is an internet blow out and sold out and you heard me say that we cramp each other's style, so, 'tap, tap, tap' again because there shouldn't be cabins available, Coo-Coo!"
"[Tap, tap, tap] oh, since I'm struggling to find a boyfriend date and I'm ready looking into rescuing six cats and purchase a walking aid walker, I mean, my cabin has two normal beds and you know, and three Murphy Beds in the rear wall in a row, you know, like a military barracks coed sleeping, so?"
"[Pushes through the half circle line of Purple Preppies] hi, I'm CB Christy and just where do we plop our luggage down for the weekend and just what would a few prep preppie CB hamburger runners wear at a bonfire dance party Bar-B-Que, we ask, Coo-Coo, who will absolutely find a boyfriend date that will be more than Goo-Goo for your diamond pointed Coo-Coo's, hmm?"
"[Tap, tap, tap] well, CB Christy, it's a pond with a small beach, so, duh, regular evening beachwear, like maybe cute cerulean blue bikinis, with or with a sarong wrap, so?"
"Mm-hmm, now you can go all 'tap, tap, tap' and hit 'enter' Coo-Coo and point us in the direction of your cabin with all these military barracks Murphy's beds in a row because we're most certainly staying the night, mm-hmm. Also, is there a staffer available to lower the beds for us, hmm?"
"[Tap, tap, tap] I mean, just be a true prep preppie Cerulean Blue, CB, CB Christy, by raising your smooth hand 19 years old hand and snap your fingers three times like you own it, duh!"
"Well, somebody should put that in the resort's brochure! [Snap, snap, snap]"
"[Up whirls a golf cart and goes beep, beep] yes, ma'am, I'm Jeff and I'll be just outside waiting for you in case there was anything that you needed from the giftshop and the giftshop carries extra sexy stuff behind the counter and the new girl, Giftshop Gwen, will be happy to help you and I promise to not peek in your shopping bags because I'm always in trouble here at the resort anyways, so?"
"Well, that was fast because..."
"[Tap, tap, tap] to my cabin and pull the Murphy Bed's down, Jeff, next!"
"Oh, um, your cabin then, Coo-Coo, I mean, am I off of probation to not go within 20 feet of your cabin now, Coo-Coo?"
"[Tap, tap, tap] damn! OMG, Jeff, I'm so sorry that I forgot to tell you that we caught the stalker who kept leaving notes on my Coco counter in the Community Hut asking me to release a whip cream bikini pic and after Twiddle Dee reviewed the security camera footage, I mean, and as it turns out, it was Whip Cream William and not you! Which is why we now have a Whip Cream Wendy working in kitchen, so, oops, my bad, but you're totally innocent and still cute when you comb your hair!"
"Oh, good, thanks, hey, wait a minute, Coo-Coo, is that why Billy seems to have disappeared into thin air because..."
"[Tap, tap, tap] next! Next, next, next! Someone with no questions, next!"
[A few hours later after dusk and after the afternoon's emotions cooled off. And that's right, Coo-Coo did take a mirror whip cream bikini selfie, but hasn't leaked it out yet. As far as we know. Because we've literally looked everywhere online]
"[Looks down at the plate] really, BBQ Quinn, two cheeseburgers per plate for each male stud, I mean, each male staffer?"
"Well, CB Christy, these male staffers burn a lot of calories and guys eat a lot in general, so, yeah. Oh, and if this plate is for Jacob, I mean, he's not your type, but that guy is a freak over his pickles, so, load the guy up a lot (giggles) and give me a wink when you find your type and we'll sweeten the plate with a joint, right there [finger pokes] between your almost 20 cerulean blue boobs, next, next, next!"
"That's me, CB Carrie and you, BBQ Quinn, think we're being shy because we're just barely 19, don't you, hmm [holds out empty plate]?"
"[Slide, plop, slide plop] are each of you CB's wearing a cerulean blue bikini thong under your normal pond beach cerulean blue bikini cut bikini bottoms, hmm? Step 1, men eat a lot, step 2, men sleep a lot, step 3, men think about sex every 11 minutes, step 4, men are actually good for a few things, step 5, men pass out over bare booty buns and step 6, I mean, you're at a resort, for Pete's sakes, next!"
[Well, well, well, the formerly shy pre preppie CBs took that hint well enough and took a chance. Well, they took the bait anyways and dropped their normal cut bikini bottoms and huh, in perfect sync!]
"[CB Charlotte] well, fine, that's done now and we're quite exposed, mm-hmm. Anyways..."
[It's like all those glowing eyes in the dark when you know they are all on you]
"Anyways, I'm CB Charlotte and what's up with Coo-Coo struggling to find a boyfriend date when this place is crawling with such handsome and fit male staffers, hmm?"
"[Slide, plop, slide plop] oh, Twiddle Dee has a very strict policy over staffers mingling and mixing it up, since, you know, that always brings the drama and rocks over the applecart. I mean, it's kind of like the fancy sign that you probably saw near the cabin's bathroom earlier, that should say 'wash your hands', but says something different like..."
"(Giggles) oh, you mean the bathroom door wall sign that says 'coed showering is strictly prohibited because people think they can do it and then they can't, XOXO, Twiddle Dee Tried It and Twiddle Dee Didn't Make It, mm-hmm', that sign?"
"(Giggles) exactly, CB Char-Char! But there's no rule about the girlfriend standing outside of the shower while washing their boyfriends back. Or his front, whatever. Oh, and if your plate of burgers is for Ethan, I mean, that guy thinks it's a myth that too much mustard will dry out one's blood, so, just like Ethan later tonight, squirt, squirt, squirt (giggles) it out."
