A trickle of semen escaped from Sister Mary's anus as I withdrew and I watched as it ran slowly down between her cheeks towards her vagina, her virgin vagina, and I reflected how much better I felt now from that first time that I had walked into Sister Mary's clinic seven weeks or so ago.
I had spotted the advert in our local church magazine. I'm not a religious man but there's something comforting about being in the company of others, sharing an experience, and sitting at the back of the church I had time to flip through the pages of the parish magazine while the priest droned on with his sermon, certainly uplifting for some but not for me.
Complete Health
The Best of East and West to heal your body, mind and soul.
Free consultation
Contact Sister Mary
I'd been feeling out of sorts for a month or two, not myself, a bit run down - you know, one of those phrases that we all use from time to time when we're not right in ourselves but don't have any specific symptoms that warrants a visit to the doctor and, in addition, I was feeling achy around my shoulders and back as if I had a bout of flu coming on so to sit in the warmth of the church knowing I was in the company of others but anonymous was just what I needed right then.
There was a phone number to call and I called later that afternoon. A pleasant voice answered.
"Complete Health. How may I help you?"
I explained how I was feeling.
"Well, I think you've come to the right place for some help. Why don't you come and see me; would 3 o'clock tomorrow afternoon be convenient?"
I had nothing on all week so agreed the appointment. The voice said that she'd txt me the address and a moment after our call ended the message arrived with the address and confirmation of the appointment time so the next afternoon I drove to the address. It was a modest house in a pleasant road, nothing exceptional about it and locking my car, I walked up the path to the front door and rang the bell.
"Ah, here you are, right on time, come on in, come on in, and let's get started shall we?"
I looked at the woman with the pleasant voice: mid-forties I guessed, wearing a nurse's white tunic and white nurse's trousers, neatly cropped hair, no makeup of any kind with a trim figure and attractive to look at. She was wearing a simple gold chain and cross and a wedding band but it was on the ring finger of her right hand.
Perhaps she was divorced.
"Here we are." She opened a door off the hallway into a consulting room with the usual furniture: a desk and chair and another comfortable chair presumably for her clients, and an examination couch, the kind one sees in any doctor's office.
"Sit yourself down," she said, indicating the more comfortable chair." Let's get started shall we?"
She took up a clipboard and pen.
"My name is Sister Mary and as you'll have seen in my little advertisement I practice what some people call alternative treatments but I take a holistic approach in my treatment which can include skeletal adjustment as you might get with a chiropractor, lymphatic drainage, Ayuverdic massage and energy rebalancing through massage of the sacred spot and lingam. Have you had any of these treatments before?"
I shook my head.
"Well, let's get a few details about you then have a look at you so we can decide what's best to get you feeling more like yourself shall we? I'll explain the treatments to you as we go along if that's all right?"
I noticed that she had a pretty smile and green eyes, a combination I've always liked. I guessed from the colouring and the slight lilt in her voice that there was some Irish blood in there somewhere.
"Now," she said, taking up her pen, "What's your full name?"
I told her and she wrote as we continued: age, medical history, any current medications, general health, how long had I been feeling like this, all the usual questions that are part of a first visit to a medical practitioner.
"Right, let's get started shall we?" she said placing the clipboard on her desk. "Undress down to your undershorts please and then we'll get your height and weight."
I liked her matter-of-fact manner; she had an air of confidence about her as if she'd seen all this before and would have no trouble sorting me out.
I undressed as instructed and stood against the wall where there was a height chart.
"Good," she said as she lowered the height gauge onto my head.
"That's six foot and a penny. Shall we call it six foot for cash?" She smiled as she said this and I smiled in return and nodded my agreement. Sister Mary added that to her notes and then indicated the weigh scales. There were two of them a little apart on the floor.
"Here, step onto this one," she said pointing to the set on the right and looking at the scale as I stood on them.
"Good, 200 pounds. You're in very good shape for your age Michael." It was the first time she'd used my name and there was that definite Irish lilt again and I couldn't help but smile again and she noticed.
"Pleased are we? Well you should be but now we'll see if we can find out a little more. Off you get," she said, and she placed the two weigh scales side by side.
"Right, once again but this time one foot on each scale. She looked carefully at the two scales.
"Ah ha, just as I thought. Do you have any tenderness in one of your feet Michael?"
Her familiarity was infectious. I told her I did, a little on the ball of my right foot.
"Well I'm not surprised. Did you know your right foot weighs more than your left foot, almost a pound more? Well not literally of course but that's how you're standing and..." She eased the waistband of my shorts down just an inch and put her fingers on the tops of my pelvis. "... that's because you've one leg ever so slightly longer than the other or to put it another way, one leg shorter than the other and that means your hips aren't level you see?" she said pressing her fingers onto the tops of my pelvis again, "But that's easy to sort out so not to worry but it will likely have caused an imbalance in another part of your body before you've even noticed the symptoms. Good," she said returning to her desk to add a note to her clipboard.
"Right, clothes on again please. I'm going to give you a note for you to take to the orthopaedic shop in town. Take your most comfortable shoes with you and they'll sort you out with some insoles to level you up and then, if you're pleased with the way that works come back and see me the same time next Monday and we'll see what we can do with the rest of you. Alright?"
I took this to mean that the free consultation was over so I dressed and put my coat on.
"Well until next Monday then Michael." and she held out her hand. Her grip was reassuringly firm and I returned her grip, lingering just a little longer perhaps than one normally does. She smiled at me.
"Now be off with you." She opened the front door and stood aside as I went out.
I found the orthopaedic shop in town and handed Sister Mary's note to the guy behind the counter. He glanced at it.
"Sister Mary huh? She's good very good. I hear excellent reports of her treatments... excellent. What's your shoe size?" I told him and he went into the back of the store, returning a few minutes later.
"Ok, let's try these. Let me have your shoes." I watched as he fitted the insoles and then I put my shoes on.
"How do they feel? A little strange at first huh? That's normal. Give them a go and if you have any discomfort come back but I'm sure you'll be ok with them."
I thanked him and paid. They did feel a little strange at first but by the time I had walked a couple of blocks I hardly noticed them.
The Monday following, I was back at Sister Mary's house, finger on the bell push but the door opened before I could press it.
"Michael, spot on time. Come in, come in." She led me into her consulting room. "Now tell me, how are those feet of yours?"