Satsuma

Lisa, maybe it was the rain that brought the scent to me on humid air. Maybe it was the season and the smell of ripening oranges that made me think of you. Or perhaps it was some small faint hint of you left on the old sweater I pulled out from the bottom drawer.

Whatever the source, I paused in the kitchen to let the feeling of you surround me, envelop me until I could feel your hands looking for a place to settle. Your cool skin caressing mine, hands reaching under my sweater and across my chest. The wind rustles and in my mind I hear you lifting your sweater off, and the sound of your bra unhooking. The scent grows stronger and I draw it deeper into my lungs.

I feel like calling you to bring you near but resist, I know I hurt you, I know I would hurt you again. The scent of satsuma orange blossoms washes over me again and embraces me.

My mind traces the colours of your skin as it moves from purple to pink, to brown. The thoughts then carry to the button of tight jeans you always wore that you always needed help taking off and then underneath, tiny mauve lingerie. Your plum lips search for my skin as you move forward, and I give it a landing point, steering them towards the most sensitive areas. They unknowingly glance over them, you want but one thing. The taste of your kisses are so warm that hold me, making me forget about your tongue, momentarily evaporating my desire to plunge inside of you.

As your body yielded to my want, you became lighter until every last piece of clothing is off. Your fully naked body then seeks me out, never letting me go more than an inch away. Never letting m see the whole of you. With our skin intertwined, you always keep us together, even when changing position. Your thighs, your legs sliding over mine until we meet, and hold.

On top, you always chose them moment when our sexes meet. Uniting them gingerly, letting your lips give way only after they have danced across my penis, preparing to take the whole of me.

I held back for you, held back because your body felt as if it were the last of the spring blossoms cradled in my arms. Even though you were ten years my senior, your body felt new. I always suspected I was your first, it was in your eyes, the shy looks and the way they always fell closed when we kissed. I always suspected you wanted, perhaps loved me longer than I had known, but only surrendered to our brief moments together. I still long to know why but I pushed to far and now I only have a memory to swim into.

When the moment was right, you would turn around in my lap, changing the angle, barely letting our bodies separate, lacing each one of your fingers between mine and then pulling yourself closer. Arcing your back until your shoulders curved across my chest and brought your neck towards my lips, where they could find your weak point. A new world that I discovered for both of us. That long electric charged strip of skin that started behind your ear and moved down towards your shoulder. The spot that ran down your spine and connected directly to your hips, making them jump and dance every time I moved back up to the back of your ear. Pushing, teasing and tempting the apex which lay behind your ear lobe where it starts to bend forwards again.

I miss that part the most. Hearing your soft moan and feeling you magically find another inch to draw us closer, your skin smelling more and more of satsuma blossoms.

This time in my memory I push you forward on to the bed. I am not going to let you finish with your back to me. I want to see your eyes as you spin around but you manoeuvre us side to side not letting go of my hands. I try and move them down to your hips and grasp your butt, you yield for a moment but then manage to direct my left arm above your head. Still your eyes lay hidden to me, even though they are closed, I hope to break the spell and gaze into them. All I am left with is a view of your lips just as the bottom lip curls inside your mouth. Biting down hard, the upper lips ripens to a deeper shade of plum.

You initiate another roll until I am on top of you, now it is my body that surrounds you, engulfs you. The pressure builds as you curl your hips in until I am an my weak point. My hot balls dance across the cool end of you and they set me loose.

Feeling that my moments comes, Lisa squeezes me tight and brings me deeper, I manage to once again reach the apex of your ear and your body begins to shudder. The skin on your neck flushes with heat and then your body releases and falls apart, like a flower. All the petals fall away as you melt and the scent of satsuma dissolves away too.

Then you are gone, again, the memory evaporates, I wish you would have stayed just once and not left me here alone surround by your perfume, trying to remember the colour of your eyes.