***Author's Note: Sorry it took so long to get chapter two out, sometimes (often) I let perfection be the enemy of progress. Thank you for your positive feedback!
~ Sam ~ Two weeks after office sex with Jake
Katie and Lucas declared their official dating status.
And while she wants to do nothing but Lucas, Maddy and I convince her to take a break from him by having dinner and drinks with us.
Sitting at the sushi restaurant, we all watch with great interest as Maddy pours sake into our cups. The simple action reminded me I have thought less about Jake recently. Until right now.
I should be thinking about how I ended the ambiguous mess of a relationship with that other guy. Wracked with guilt, I called him about an hour after ... Jake and I fucked each other senseless. I hadn't worked out what to expect, but the end turned out to be instantaneous closure.
Apparently, the guy who I thought was my boyfriend didn't consider us boyfriend/girlfriend. His words were "close friends with extra benefits." He didn't think he was doing "boyfriend things." When I asked him what "boyfriend things" were, he replied, "you know, romantic stuff."
After he said that, the picture became clear; he was not, nor had been, worth my time.
The whole ordeal was frustrating yet cleansing. He didn't understand why I wanted to end things and argued with me about my numerous reasons. I asked why he thought arguing how I felt would somehow change my mind. He replied, "because you're not making sense."
A heady mix of emotions swelled up after that remark, all of which confirmed my decision.
After about an hour and a half of his bullshit, I finally ended the conversation with, "fuck off, we're done." Not the most elegant ending, but little pickled face fuckboys like him need a swift kick in the ass more often.
I didn't mention how terrible he is in bed. Or how his lack of skill drove me so insane. I threw myself at a guy who sexually harassed me until it was no longer harassment.
And speaking of Jake, I hadn't talked to him since that last "interview." I wasn't even sure I could talk to him again anyway. The things I said, did, how loudly I moaned, and how I rewarded his asshole behavior by not only having sex but also coming.
Several times.
And I begged him to do it.
I don't know what I was thinking. Actually, no, I wasn't thinking. Thinking is a luxury when you are fucking a guy on his work desk. Especially when fucking on a work desk was not on your agenda for the day, week, or year.
All that, combined with the guilt, made avoiding him the easiest option. Albeit not the most appealing or preferred. I'd be lying if I said I didn't constantly fantasize about Jake fucking all the hostility out of me. Repeatedly.
I also hadn't mentioned anything to Katie or Maddy. Although they would probably be supportive and defend my actions, I wasn't sure my actions were worth defending.
After dinner, we decided Pulse, a nightclub/music venue, would offer the best entertainment for the night. Pulse is a fantastically strange place with the choicest people watching. On any given night, you'll encounter a varied and whimsical parade of humans.
Micheal Jackson impersonator who raps? Check.
A girl with glitter all over her body with a matching bra to her crushed velvet bell-bottoms? Yup.
A guy with a cape and prosthetics glued to his face? Sure.
Every day dude-bros who don't really fit in with the vibe? Guaranteed.
Mix that with eccentric, mismatched furnishings on the second-floor balcony, and it proved for a truly unique experience every single night.
We arrived early enough to score one of the funky couch/booth situations up top. The wobbly table sat around an oddly shaped half booth with a vintage couch right next to it. I note the mothballs hanging from the dimly lit lamp above us. How the 1970s floral design on the couch directly clashes against the rickracked pillows adorned with gold fringe. The whole setup went together because none of it really went together, which added up to a whimsical charm.
We chatted over drinks, our eyes following each patron as they wandered in fresh from the street. Although Katie and I were exceedingly more fascinated by our surroundings than Maddy, who appeared troubled by a turbulent text exchange.
"Do you care if Lucas joins us?" Katie asked with an awkward yet humorous look. Maddy and I shrugged in agreement. Lucas was chill and quite fun, might as well add some liveliness to the night. Plus, I didn't want to see the look of utter disappointment on Katie's if we said 'fuck no.'
I briefly considered Jake may have told Lucas about our indecent hookup. All I could do was hope to hell he kept his stupid, talented mouth shut. It did not cross my mind Lucas would bring along Jake. But lo and behold, there he and Lucas stood.
Lucas slid next to Katie, leaving his only seating option next to me. On a half booth thing that was so small, our knees could touch.
As Jake sat, I clenched every muscle and clamped my body shut, absolutely determined to prevent any bodily contact. I squeezed my legs so close together a nickel would leave an indent between my knees.
You know, the original form of birth control.
Sure, that hasn't panned out so well, as centuries of unplanned pregnancies show. But my confidence level soared with this plan.
Meanwhile, Jake had absolutely zero hesitation about plopping down next to me with a wide smile and a sigh. The entire display seemed to invite, and maybe even encourage, contact.
"Maddy, Sam. How are you tonight?" He asked like I didn't beg him to make me come a few weeks ago.
"Good," we both say. Maddy was generally the social, chatty one, but she continued to bust my balls with the perpetual texting.
"How is your research project going?" Jake asked after noting Maddy was fully checked out.
"Wonderful, thanks." I clipped, my eyes darting to either Katie or Maddy for help-- to no avail. How do I get myself out of this situation? Faking my own death seemed the most effective, but I didn't have the money to move.
As I ran through less extreme ideas, Katie and Lucas announced they were braving the line at the bar to get drinks. My insides lurched and curdled like milk in lemon juice. The packed line at the bar meant getting a drink would take ages. If I lost Maddy, that would leave Jake and me.
"Need anything, Sam?" Katie asked, not reading the fear on my face or the silent prayer for her to stay.
"No, not right now," I replied with a forced grin and a scrunched nose.
"Jake?" Lucas followed with a curious eyebrow raise.
"Tecate, and make sure they put lime in it, please," he shot back. As they turned to leave, my stomach dropped a bit further.
At least I still had Maddy, even if her phone monopolized her attention and probably wouldn't notice if Jake and I frantically made out like debauched teenagers.
"Maddy, who are you texting with?" I asked when Jake turned his head to look at me.
She looked up, eyes wide, while shaking her head. "Ah, sorry. I know I'm being rude," she held up her phone and gripped it until her knuckles turned white, "my mom is freaking out about this big ga-get together in a few weeks, and she's driving my sister insane. So I'm texting with both of them, and my mom writes huge paragraphs, and my sister responds right away." She rubbed her head and sat back with a big sigh. "I think I need some weed. Want to go out and smoke?" She eyed both of us.
Maddy knew I only did edibles. Maybe she was throwing me a lifeline? Maybe she read my silent beg to be rescued from this delectable slab of man.
"Oh wait, what am I saying? You hate smoking." she shook her head again, "Jake, you wanna get high with the cool kids?"
"No, I'm good with just-drinks tonight."
Sweet lord, were my friends letting me down. Why have we never discussed a signal for help in social situations? Why?
And with that, Maddy got up to leave. Jake and I remained. And not only that, but he also blocked my graceful exit. If I wanted to leave, I'd have to awkwardly scoot around to the other side or crawl underneath the table like a god damn animal.
"I haven't seen you around since our last interview." He smiled like the lofty bastard he is. I looked straight ahead while he looked at me, my body clenched tight, still desperately trying not to touch him by accident.
"Yeah, well, I think I got all I needed in that last one." Of course, I'm referring to the amount of information I got from our interview. Physically, I could use more. Much, much more.
Yet, my cheeks burned at the memory of the impulsive and slutty detour in our interview. I mean, I fucked another guy while kinda sorta being with another guy.
Jake represented a big ball of shame that I didn't - ok shouldn't- revisit. Any sexual stuff with him was like returning to the scene of the crime. Besides, he's still an annoying, arrogant prick.
So why, given all that, did I still want to throw my naked body on him like a blanket?
He cracked a grin and nodded. "Not to split hairs, but I thoroughly disagree."
I ran my tongue over my teeth. No more innuendo. We're cutting the bullshit.
I position my whole body to face him-- but still careful not to touch. "First off, that sentence doesn't make sense. Second, what the fuck?" I asked in a punchy tone. He lifted his eyebrows and gave me a look that feigned ignorance. "I thought you said you couldn't hook up with students. And then you aggressively come into me--" Immediately shutting my mouth when I caught the mistake, I cleared my throat and tried again. "I mean, onto me. Come. ONTO. Me. Whatever, you aggressively hit on me and, and..."
"Fuck you on my desk?" He added, looking quite satisfied with himself.
"Yes. Now you're coming onto me again. I don't get it. Did the rules change?"
"No." He said, the simple and brief answer only annoying me more.
"Then what? You broke the rules. Why?" I said turning this into an interrogation rather than a conversation
He shrugged. "You're hot, and I wanted to fuck you. Doesn't have to be more complicated than that." He paused for a moment, thinking about my question some more. "And when you said your boyfriend couldn't make you come, I kinda lost it."
"You were such an asshole. And I'm an idiot who rewarded your douchey Alpha charm." I shook my head and turned my body back to face the table, my back sinking into the booth cushion.
"Rewarded indeed. I don't know about the Alpha comment, though."
"Pffft," I clipped, "you taunting me, shamelessly checking out my body, being an antagonist shit. All alpha male behavior."
He nodded, looking playfully introspective. "Hmmmm, so you just gave me a road map to turning you on so much that we have hot animal sex in my office? Interesting," he said, returning to his playful, thoughtful look. Easing back, he stretched his arm out behind me, resting on the back of the booth. I snapped my head to look at him, only to see that same shit-eating grin.
"No, I didn't, and stop looking at me like that!"
