Prologue
I don't know how long I've been lying here in the darkness. Is it night or day? I know I've slept at least a bit, but was it for hours or minutes? I'm confused and disorientated but the sheer strangeness of the situation is a big part of what makes it so exciting...
1.
It began with a message. There had been months of online chatting, the occasional voice call when circumstances made it possible, some fleeting images shared over a video connection... and then, one morning, out of the blue, a simple set of instructions waiting for me when I logged on to Skype: the address of a hotel in my city; the reference number of a booking that had been made in my name; a time and date the following week to go there and check in, when there would be an envelope to collect at reception containing further instructions, to read while I'm still alone in the room. Nothing more. And the only reply to the message I sent asking for some sort of explanation was short, three words: "Just be there."
2.
I find it hard to concentrate over the days that follow, my head full of questions... Is this really happening? Are you really going to be here, in Dublin, an ocean away from your home? What will happen in that hotel room? Am I ready for this? Are we ready for this? How will I explain my absence...? The last question is at least a practical one, something I can address: an invented business trip, a day's leave from work.
3.
I look at my watch, nervous, not knowing what to expect, anticipation building. 10pm exactly. The time you'd told me to go to the hotel. I push the door open and walk to the reception desk, where I'm greeted by a young man.
"Good evening, sir. How can I help?"
"I have a reservation in the name of Jones. Do you need a reference for the booking?"
"That shouldn't be necessary, I'll just check the system... yes, I think this should be it... Matt Jones?"
"Yes, that's it..."
"Room for two for one night..."
"Yes, the other person should be getting here later. Her name is Laurie. You can just let her come up."
"I see that the room is already paid for. And, let's see... something's been left for you..."
He turns and reaches for something on a shelf behind the desk. An envelope, quite bulky, which he hands to me before taking a key card and swiping it.
"Room 526 on the fifth floor. The elevator is just over there..."
I walk to where he is pointing and press the button, my mouth a little dry, my heart thumping. The elevator arrives and I step inside, already opening the envelope before the door has even slid shut behind me. I can see that there is a sheet of paper, as well as something black and stiff, not completely flat and folded once. I take it from the envelope and unfold it. A mask, in the style of a Venetian carnival mask, with a black ribbon to hold it on... I don't have time to take out the sheet of paper before the elevator reaches the fifth floor and the doors slide open. I step out and see that room 526 is to the right.
I fumble slightly as I slide the card into the slot, tell myself to calm down, breathe deeply.
4.
The room is very much like all modern hotel rooms: magnolia walls, a large double bed, a desk with a chair, a large wall-mounted TV, a bathroom just off the entrance. I leave my overnight bag on the desk and take the paper out of the envelope.
"Good evening Matt. I hope you're looking forward to tonight as much as I am. Right now I want you to do exactly as I am going to tell you: undress down to your underwear and put on the mask that you found with this note. Take the chair that you'll find at the desk, place it in the middle of the floor, facing the door, and turn out the light. Return to the chair and sit on it. Then wait. You won't have to wait long. There is one other rule that must be respected: no speaking. We have explored so much with words - tonight is different. Tonight we go beyond words."
I undress, hanging my clothes in the closet, leaving just my boxers on. I take my toilet bag from my overnight bag and brush my teeth. I don't know if you'll want me to wear a condom but I leave a couple on the bedside table. Then I put on the mask and go back into the bathroom to look at my reflection. The mask makes me physically anonymous, except for my lower face and mouth... You wouldn't recognise me if you saw me in the street. This is how we have always wanted it. Anonymous yet intimate.
I turn off the light at the switch just inside the door and in the darkness I can just about make out the chair. I find my way to it, sit and wait. A few minutes pass...
I hear footsteps in the corridor outside. They stop in front of the door and there is a click as the lock is undone. The door opens. I see only an outline at first, backlit, a suggestion... As my eyes adjust I can see that your face is hidden by a mask. You are wearing a long, loose-fitting coat, revealing nothing of the shape of your body. You step into the room and open the bathroom door just a couple of centimetres before turning on the bathroom light and closing the door from the corridor. There is just enough light to find your way across the room towards me, stopping to place a bag on the desk beside mine. I begin to rise from the chair but you gesture to me to stay seated and move around the chair to stand behind me, placing your hands on my bare shoulders, your thumbs softly rubbing the nape of my neck... I find myself making a sound almost like a cat purring. It's happening. You are touching me. Touching me physically. Skin on skin. This isn't a dream. It isn't happening in my imagination. It's happening in the real world, not the virtual world. The urge to speak, to tell you what I'm feeling, is so strong but I remain silent. My body speaks for me, reacting to the touch, my cock hardening inside my boxers...
Then your hands leave my shoulders and I sense that you are taking something out of your coat pocket... a blindfold is slipped over my eyes and knotted behind my head, tightly, so that I see nothing. My other senses are immediately heightened. I'm aware of you moving to face me, leaning down... and your lips barely brush mine, briefly, the faintest touch... You take my hand, bringing me gently to my feet, and lead me to the bed, where I lie still, my heart beating quickly, my whole being tingling with anticipation... You step away for a moment and I hear you taking off and hanging up your coat, then opening the bag that you had left on the desk. You return and sit on the edge of the bed, resting one hand on my thigh...
... then you take my left wrist and raise my arm above my head and I feel a silk rope being tied around the wrist, tightly... I can feel my wrist being pulled to the corner of the bed and I'm aware that you're now passing the rope behind the bed head. You move to the other side of the bed and I can hear the rope being pulled through towards you, before you take my right wrist and wind the trailing length of rope around it, pulling it to the corner of the bed and tightening the knot, leaving me immobile, exposed... and when I feel your hands slipping inside the waistband of my boxers and slowly pulling them down my legs I gasp, my erect cock springing free... You pull the boxers past my feet before taking my ankles and spreading my legs, then attaching my ankles firmly to the bottom corners of the bed with the rope...
I wait, not knowing what to expect, my pulse racing, my breathing shallow, my fully erect cock twitching. My naked body is yours to do with it what you want... You move to the top of the bed and sit, I sense your head coming closer to mine, then moan as your wet tongue plays in my ear for just a few seconds before I hear a whisper:
"Wait."
That's it. One word. Can I speak now? I open my mouth but you stop me:
"Shhhhh...."
Then I hear you taking your coat and putting it on before walking to the door, opening it and going out of the room, leaving me in the darkness. I don't understand but I know that you will be back. I just have to wait. Waiting is part of the experience. Waiting is part of what makes what will come even more intense. The minutes pass. I eventually relax, letting my mind float freely, imagining, remembering...
5.
I don't know how long I've been lying here in the darkness. Is it night or day? I know I've slept at least a bit, but was it for hours or minutes? I'm confused and disorientated but the sheer strangeness of the situation is a big part of what makes it so exciting...
I hear the door opening again, then clicking shut, the sound of a light switch, I'm conscious of light now filling the room but through the blindfold it is only a very relative light for me; I see nothing. Then I'm aware of soft footsteps on the carpet and the rustling sounds of clothes being removed... I feel my cock beginning to stir at the idea that you are here, with me, that I will soon feel your naked body against mine... I want to say something but your instructions were clear; I resist the urge to say your name. In the absence of sight, my hearing is extra-alert... I hear the chair being moved to near the foot of the bed, the sound of something being placed on it but I have no idea what it might be... then I sense your approach, the air almost crackling with sexual tension. I feel the mattress dip slightly as you sit on the edge of the bed. Your hand touches my cheek, caressing it softly... then I feel your warm breath on my face as you lean into me, your lips brushing mine, your hand on my chest now, your thumb flicking across my left nipple... your tongue slips briefly into my mouth before you break the kiss and I'm conscious of your movements as you swing your legs up onto the bed...
I feel your hand move from my chest to my stomach, your fingers playing in the hair below my navel, then grazing the base of my cock... I gasp, my hips pushing upwards involuntarily. Then I feel your nails very lightly grazing my balls, before one fingertip runs slowly along the tender, super-sensitive underside of my cock, towards the tip, my foreskin drawn back... I can feel the pre-cum already oozing from me and my cock jerks when your fingertip begins very slowly to run along the slit at the very tip of my cock, swirling around it now, wet with my anticipation... then your thumb and index close around the tip and you slide loosely down my shaft, stopping at the base, your other fingers closing around my balls, gently squeezing...
I'm aware of a shifting of your weight on the bed and I groan softly as the tip of your tongue touches the tip of my cock... slowly circling it... and my groan is louder as I feel the softness of your lips and the wet warmth of your mouth as you take me inside you... your hand still holding the base of my cock and my balls as your lips slide down my shaft... slowly down, your tongue swirling, then slowly back up, down again, taking me deeper into your mouth, back up... an incredible velvety warmth enfolding me as you settle into a slow, steady rhythm... I allow myself to surrender to the sensations coursing through me.
The delicious pleasure you are giving me lasts for several minutes and then I feel you loosening your grip on me and raising your head from my cock... just one last kiss on the tip before you begin to move again. I feel you positioning yourself above me, your knees touching my sides just below my armpits. You lean forward and I'm aware of your hands gripping the bed head... the scent of your arousal grows stronger and I feel your pussy lips on my tip of my nose, then moving to my mouth... I can almost taste you before I even touch you with my tongue...
