Spending January in San Diego is not such a bad thing. The sun still shines, though not as warmly, and the fog actually lifts earlier in the mornings than it does in June. I hadn't been back to America's Finest City since 2006, when I first left home to go to college in Northern California. My old connections and friends had long left town, most moving off to Universities of their own, or adventures, jobs and real life.
San Diego has a happening young peoples' scene, with three large universities and a couple of districts almost entirely occupied by the 20-something crowd. After seeking out some playmates in the various bar ghettos of the city, prospects for a good time were looking dim judging by the over-tanned, too-hot-for-you clientele I found most everywhere. I tried searching the internet for a random hookup, but most of my inquiries were returned by 'working girls', who I had neither the interest or budget for.
I finally decided to post a personals ad myself. I felt not a little awkward about it, after all, wasn't it a sign of desperation to be whoring oneself out online? How could I possibly meet anyone worthwhile through such an anonymous meatmarket as Craigslist?
My post went up on December 30th, just in time for the late Holiday's loneliness run that precedes the somewhat morbid specter of Valentine's Day.
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New Years FWB-m4w-24
I'm a recent college grad, back in town for a few weeks after traveling and looking for someone to share my time with. I somewhat vainly consider myself to be an intellectual, and I value someone who is a competent conversationalist as well as a competent lover.
About me: I'm 6'1", blonde/blue, SWM, into cycling, reading, a big movie buff and a world traveler.
About you: Near my age (22-30), single, sexually open and looking for a casual fling this Winter season.
If you're interested in meeting up, let's try to arrange a coffee/beer get together, where we can see if we click and move from there.
-Geoff
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I'd read the usual rants and raves online about what to put in a personals ad, how to not describe your cock or demand hopelessly specific physical requirements. I wasn't too fixated on finding my ideal 'dream girl' anyways, I was just looking for fun. I hoped that signing my post would be a good show of faith and might encourage someone real to respond.
The first day I got two hits. One was a sketchily written, typo ridden proposition that just sounded like a troll. The other was from a 'dating site' that wanted me to join, for the value of 9.95/month, and find 'horny hotties in my area'.
For the next three days it was total radio silence. Not a peep in my inbox, and daily I checked the ads listings, just to see if I found anyone else to respond to.
I wasn't working in town (though I was ostensibly job hunting), and took a weekend off for a little stay-cation camping trip nearby. When I got back to internet access, there was a message waiting in my inbox.
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Re: New Years FWB
Hi Geoff,
Saw your CL ad, it was refreshing to find someone not demand 'cum hungry sluts' and 'no fatties.' I'm a 25 y/o in PB, I work two jobs, one doing bitch work in marketing and the other waiting tables. I got my degree in Communications from SDSU two years ago, so I'm a 'competent conversationalist' as you say. If you aren't busy, I'd like to take you up on that offer to meet up for a beer. I attached my picture, but its not too revealing for privacy's sake. Send me an email if interested.
Tara
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Simple, to the point, casual yet well written. And it was the only option, really. The picture was intriguing. It was of her face, but from the bridge of the nose to the top of the head, so it showed only two heavily mascara'd eyes, a pale forehead and jet black hair held back by a bandanna-patterned headband. I replied:
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Tara,
I'm definitely free, Wednesday to Friday work best for me, but I can do the weekend too. What do you say about meeting at The Living Room Cafe in PB Friday?
-Geoff
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Geoff,
I work Friday night but Thursday is my day off. The Living Room sounds good, how about 5 O'clock? I'll be wearing a pink and white polka-dot headband and fishnets.
-T
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I was set. The thought of meeting a stranger for casual sex was almost too much to bear, I think I masturbated five times a day waiting for our rendezvous. Polka dots and fishnets suggested she maybe had a bit of a hipster vibe, which was cool with me. I compensated for my inherent un-hipness by actually putting in my long-neglected nose-ring and making some old jeans into cutoff jean shorts, which are oddly stylish in that crowd. It sounds lame, but I wanted to dress the part, hipsters can be snobby and if I came off too square I may not get any.
Thursday afternoon lasted an eternity. I went for a bike ride in the morning all around PB, intently people watching, trying to catch a first glimpse of my 'Tara'.
After backtracking and creepily stalking every hipster girl I saw, I went home and intently resisted beating off in excitement, I wanted to save myself and make a good impression should our meeting go well.
At four o'clock I garbed up in my hipster costume, hopped on my bike (thankfully not owning a car is cool with certain scenes), and rode down the hill towards the Pacific Beach neighborhood. I could tell I was nervous from the way my foot jiggled on the pedals every time I stopped riding. I must have made record time, because I showed up a very uncool 20 minutes early. I locked up and ducked behind the cafe to furiously chain smoke and obsessively check the time. I held out til 5:05, when I decided that fuck being fashionably late, I was ready to go.
I walked up the steps to the cafe deck, and surreptitiously scoped out the crowd. No polka dot headbands, but plenty of fishnets. When I got to the counter I couldn't remember if she'd said meet for coffee or beer, but I grabbed a Green Flash Pilsner anyways and headed back out to the smoking section.
She was sitting in the corner under a trellis of bougainvillea. She had been sitting there when I first walked up, but she must have put on the headband after I went inside, I had double checked her on my first pass, peeking over the top of her book to check for the tell-tale polka dots. But now the headband was on, and I could recognize the dyed jet black coif I had seen on my computer. For some stupid reason I checked the time on my phone one last time, and walked over.
'Uh...Hi, Tara?'
She lowered her book, Harry Potter en Espanol (geeky sexy), and smiled.
'You must be Geoff! Nice to meet you.'
She extended a pale, manicured hand with pink nail polish.Her handshake was Victorian-feminine weak, but the softness of her touch and her reading material made my little hipster heart go all a-flutter.
She was beautiful. And I'm not just saying that. It turns out my hipster estimation was correct, but off by a subculture. She was a rockabilly chick, through and through. The polka dot headband and the dyed black hair, a very pale face that was obviously made up to be even paler. Ruby red lips, ripped black band T-shirt (which I had never heard of, of course), short black skirt over black nylons and hi-top Doc Marten's. I'd often admired girls of that style before, combining beguiling feminine touches with a punk-y darkness vibe that was quite tantalizing. Sitting down I couldn't give a full go-over of her figure, but I couldn't have anyways, her eyes held me. Done up heavily, like the dark eyes in the picture, but with the faintest of silver flakes on the lashes. It could have been trashy but on her it was intoxicating. In the last two years all of my lays had been somewhat frantic, earthy affairs with other women travelers, lots of arm pit hair and unwashed ponytails, and it was remarkably breathtaking to consider being with a woman with subtle flair in her appearance.
We chatted. Simple courtesies at first, poorly executed compliments on her looks (we were here for sex, after all), but once we started to talk books it really took off. She was reading Harry Potter to work on her Spanish. She had a hard time communicating with a lot of her co-workers in the restaurant and heard that reading childrens literature was a good way to work on sentence structure and familiarity.
We tried to talk about music, but she of course was into bands I had never heard of, and I didn't want to throw myself into a tailspin by mentioning my love of bluegrass banjo, which could have been niche and cool or could have been a major turnoff.