Praying at an Empty Altar

She eyed me warily from across the checkouts. I stood there, pretending not to see her. Of course, then she would look down, doing her job, and I would return the action. We played this game all day, every day that we worked together.

It was even more fun when she avoided my eyes while walking a foot from me in the cafeteria, or when she would sit with her feet propped up in the bench ignoring my existence while I leaned over her to punch in or out on the time clock.

We hadn't spoken for at least a month. And it was beginning to wear on my charm, to say the least. A few months before I had toyed with the idea of dating her. She was luscious. Golden brown hair down to her waist; a round, pretty face with pouting lips and bright smiles; large dark eyes that bore into you; and a curvaceous body of a goddess. It wasn't a model's body. Not a starved, empty temple. She was all earthen goddess. Long, runner legs for a 5'5 frame. She was slightly muscular, which was natural since she had been a cart pusher for over 2 years.

She had a 46-33-43 measurement, and God was that a delicious frame for me. I wanted to bite her from head to toe. What was even more amazing about her wasn't her looks, but her personality and intelligence. Ann was one of those girls with 1450 SATs and 32 ACTs. She was loved and revered by everyone, an amazing worker, witty and funny- Hell, she had just proven to be too good for me.

I'm 30. Just turned, if that's any credit for my case. 30. Balding. Scabby where prying eyes can't see. Chubby in the winter, but I keep my shape by running every day for the better part of the year. I like Metal and Thrash. I live with a friend from college. My longtime girlfriend just dumped me for a man off the internet. Again, to my credit, she tried to get me back after seeing what she was saddled with... And I fucking work retail. At 30. In a dead-end, part time job.

Ann is 18. We have the same interests, I suppose that's credit, too. From what I've gathered about her over the last few months of talking, she has a strict father, her mother disappeared a few years ago, and she's very responsible. She's saved about 5,000 dollars up, is taking a year off school to continue saving, and is going to go back to college next fall to become a teacher. She lives at home, but she's saving her money up to buy a house eventually.

She has a car, a few bills, she originally got her job at this supermarket to help her father pay the bills while he fought his worker's comp case. The girl is amazing. So amazing that after two years, she's already landed a supervisor position in her section, and is in training for management. Remember, however, those two years were spent doing piddly jobs of a janitor. She turns 18, becomes a cashier, and her mind begins to bring everything together. She'll be in management in a few months, probably making more than me, a veteran of 10 years at this hellhole.

So, obviously, when the vision came to me of her interest... I reciprocated. She was... beautiful, smart- she was the American Dream. But then again, think about it. She's 18. Going to college. Beautiful. Would she really stay with a 30 year old, balding man when a new, more handsome, more intelligent, more youthful beau showed face?

We went to the movies first, and the entire night, my eyes faced the screen, but my mind and cock were firmly on her. We went out to lunch next, and she wore this low-cut shirt. On purpose. I had to go to the bathroom four or five times to compose myself so as to not make a scene by jumping on her.

Then of course, I started to realize that she was, to be perfectly honest, too good for me. At that restaurant, I remembered all the men that had stared at her when she walked in, while she was oblivious. So, I stopped talking to her except when she initiated it. Which, I came to realize, was a mistake. A week later she sent me about ten text messages through the day while I was at work pointing out that I was ignoring her, and how ignoring people when there was a problem was a failing in me.

It surprised me how perfectly she could deduce people, but something wasn't quite right about what she was doing. I called her after work to put any thought of us dating out of her head, and she laughed at me, she was cold. She was so biting that in her malicious laughter she cut the conversation short. At work she paid me as little attention as I paid her, less in most cases.

After awhile I began to feel uneasy. It's not exactly a good experience when you know a perfectly nice, albeit slightly off her rocker, girl ignores you plainly while advancing her own career in mockery of yours. Ann flounced by me, naturally flirting with all the boys and men she did before, cracking jokes at all the right times, making uproarious laughter spur up almost everywhere she went- She was driving me crazy.

One night she walked by me, brushing up against me, allowing me enough to catch a breeze of her smell. Citrus and something floral- and the defined scent of slightly aroused and sweating woman. It was ethereal meshed with earthen, and it drove me crazy. I drove home with a hard on like I hadn't had for years. All I wanted was to make her mine. Throw her to my bed and fuck her to the ends of the Earth.

My dreams were what truly began to unwind me. They were so good, so sweet, so rough that I would wake up, and no other woman could live up to them. I began to worry that nothing could live up to them. I couldn't bring myself to touch another woman in this time, and my desire was running in overdrive. Somehow, in her dark, knowing eyes, she was forcing this on me. She knew what effect she would have on me, but I don't think she exactly knew the effect this was going to have on her.

We came in at the same time today, and when I took my lunch, I came into the cafeteria to see her sitting in the corner with a soda reading a magazine. As usual, a science magazine. She was engrossed, but as she was adept at observing people and trusting intuition, she turned to look up at me when I came within a few feet of her. It was a brief, almost unnoticeable glance, but I caught it with my predatory eyes.

When we had spent lunches together, we would normally sit across from each other, but today I brought the chair around so that I was sitting on the side adjacent to her. She froze for a moment, then looked up at me darkly, inquiringly. She knew I would break and come to this point. But her responses to my breaking were all hypothetical at this time.

"Hello," she said in a low voice.

"Hi."

She flipped a page and continued reading. After looking up a few times, she realized I was trying to get her to speak first, and she knew it wasn't yet the time of my breaking. Standing, Ann began to walk away, while citing, "I have to punch back from break now."

"You're on lunch."

"I have to punch back from my meal then."

"You're taking a 15 minute lunch? I do believe those have to be authorized by your manager. I can call her if you'd like."

Her eyes shocked me with their black fury. They would have shocked you too if you had known what a sweet, soft spoken girl she was... could be. However, she had made it blatantly clear to me that there were many sides to her that people often didn't get the chance to know. Staunchly, she sat back down. "What do you wish to speak of Mike? Tell me, and tell me quickly. I have no patience for morons."

"I want to know why you're ignoring me. I don't feel I deserve it."

A small, malevolent smirk crept on her lips, almost like a mistaken shadow. "Am I ignoring you? I spoke to you a week or so ago. I've not directly and blatantly not spoken to you in return of your speech. Am I talking to you now? What is this if I'm ignoring you?"

Again, her ability at wordplay had me at a disadvantage. Remind me not to play with people that are smarter than I am. "Ok, fine. You want me to level with you?"

Her eyelids dropped in exasperation. "Obviously."

"I don't understand why we can't still be friends, if nothing else. I wasn't lying when I said I thought you were an amazing person."

She took in her breath deeply, a reverse sigh, and rolled her eyes. "You must really think I'm stupid. Naïve. Something to that effect. Well, let me level with you then, Mike. You're attractive, I was attracted to you. However, I find that to be more of a threat than anything. You know I'm antisocial, that I am very friendly, but have very little trust left inside me and that outside of work I rarely go out. It's not just because of my father. He's a secondary player in this. If I truly wanted to go out and party every night, I could, and I would. There's no doubt about that. You make me feel somewhat compelled to tell you things, and that is a breach of the security of my inner defenses. Got it?

"The reason I sent those texts to you was almost exclusively due to the fact that the chance was sitting in front of me. I've been looking for a simple route to excluding you from my life. You gave me the chance and I took it. But it is true. You were ignoring me. Good timing has always been a strong suit for me."

Ann looked away from me and began to flip through the pages of her magazine again. How logical, how cold, how unforgiving she was. "So you would rather not be friends."

"I would love to be friends. If I didn't feel compelled to tell you things. You have that one special trait of a truthful face to the world that is different from the other liars in society. And you happen to be an attractive male. With lots of patience. Add that up and you find the type of guy I fall for. So rare, you're only the second I've met in my life. The first was married. You do the math. So, sorry."

Her eyes met mine... and what I saw shocked me. Hate, fear, and hunger. What a primitive animal this was before me, twisting in her seat. One hand gripped the table tightly, and I saw that the knuckles were white, although her face was stoical. "You've fooled many in your life, Ann."

The dark eyes continued to burn into me with a black fire. "The only thing I want from you now is something you couldn't possibly live up to."

Oh, and those eyes intrigued me so. Demon gems. "Why don't you tell me and I'll see if I could or not. I think you underestimate me."

She had this nasty habit of half saying a sentence, or bringing up a subject just to discard it as my curiosity was peaked. This time she didn't do that. She went in for the kill and leaned in so that others around us couldn't hear. "I've been tense lately. My dreams have been destroying me, betraying me. I can handle them, but why? The ache in the pit of my stomach has been growing. I'm standing on the lane ringing people up living hallucinations in my head, so wet that I can feel the fabric of my panties sticking to me. It hurts. It physically is hurting me now, I've denied it so long.

"I just want a man. No relationship, nothing. Just a man to fuck me when I need to. To make me feel beautiful and fuck me senseless, with nothing else. I don't want to talk to him, I don't want to date him. I just want to fuck him. I don't see that in you. You're the type of guy that wants a slut, but also a relationship... At the same time. Date other women, I don't care. As long as you don't give me a disease from the whore, I don't care."

The truth was etched in every facet of her disposition. I had noticed her half-lidded ecstasy on a lane and attributed it to her natural carefree attitude. Apparently that was not exactly it. She stood to begin walking toward the time clock. "Give me a call if you decide to chew on that. I'm assuming of course that you still have my number. If it's not worth it, if you're not up to it, don't call. I don't expect to hear from you, anyways."

I called that night after we got off work. The rest of the night she had remained perfectly indifferent to me as she had been the last month. What a vixen, what a minx, a goddess. I kept watching her swinging hips, her long runner's stride, her long hair swept up into an elegant twist, the soft curve of her body... I wondered what her skin tasted like. What her pussy tasted like. How tight she was. How she would feel in my arms. I told her all this on the phone. I was also assuming she wanted perfect honesty from me, and she did. She made an arrangement for a few days later.

Sitting in my living room, I had established for my roommate to stay with his girlfriend that night. I saw the unfamiliar car pull up into the area parking lot for my building. The car door slammed, and her eyes looked at the building quietly as she paused on the sidewalk out front. This was one of her last chances to back out gracefully of our agreement. Gripping her car keys resolutely in her hand, she continued on to the door. She called up to me, and I buzzed her in. Coming up the stairs, I opened the door impatiently at the lightest tap from her. Ann smirked. "You can't be that quick on everything, Mike."

My cock wasn't saying the same thing. She pretended not to notice, and out of courtesy I asked her if she wanted to get something to eat. She waved me off. "I told you we weren't going to date."

"I was being polite."

"I don't even want to be friends. Good manners are unnecessary outside of the bedroom."

Setting her purse down, she looked around. I gave her the grand tour, ending with the bedroom, which she entered slowly. Turning, she lightly sat down on the bed and leaned back. "You can still go back Mike, if you're not feeling comfortable with this."

As strange as it was, she was right. This was most men's fantasy. To be able to fuck a beautiful woman on her beck and call without strings was a gift. Still, something about this just didn't feel quite right. I walked toward her, the room beginning to spin. Blood had been drained to my lower regions for too long. It felt like my blood was boiling. She initiated the clumsy kiss, that evolved into a passionate duel between our mouths. Pulling away from it, she wiped her bottom lip laughingly. "How was it for the first kiss?"

I smiled. "For our first kiss, it was very, very promising."

Her thighs clasped to my body as I stood between them. I began to kiss her again, this time ending up on her neck and shoulders, lapping at them like the lovesick puppy I was. I lightly bit her right below the ear and she moaned, pressing closer to my hovering body. She hadn't messed around with clothing. She only wore a simple shirt and pants. I quickly swept the shirt over her head, and unsnapped the bra.

Ann's breasts were honestly too big for even my hands to grasp completely. When I sucked her large, ripe nipples into my mouth, I felt like a child. My head was spinning as my dick throbbed between her legs. When I had left a trail of burning kissed down her torso to her navel, I unbuttoned her pants and tugged them down. She didn't bother with panties, and I had swept off her socks and shoes with the pants.

We were both impatient with my clothing. I quickly threw my shirt off, and had not bothered with a belt. Her hands nimbly unfastened my trousers and they fell to the ground. I stepped out of my boxer briefs as well. She backed farther on the bed, and I followed, leaning over her, my dick vying to be wrapped up by her velvet, warm sheathe. A fortuitous phrase was spoken by the bright angel under me as I considered foreplay. "Get to it, I'm hot enough as it is."

Her hand grasped the base of my shaft, and positioned it at the entrance to her core. I slowly pressed in, teasing her while she murmured profanities at me, but then giving in to her demands, I thrusted in hard and deep. Hearing her cry out weakly, I pulled out, and saw blood on my cock. She had bitten her lip and tears had sprung up at the corners of her eyes.

In all the time I knew her, I had suspected, but not truly believed she was a virgin. With how ready and randy she had seemed, I had not considered that she was inexperienced. I pushed in again, more slowly and heard her shuddering breath. A few more shallow pumps, and I felt her recover. "Fuck me, Mike."

I began to pump into her long and deep. It was not enough. She breathed anxiously now, "Fuck me."

Her urging had me going harder and faster, but still, it was not enough. She bucked up her hips, grinding them with my cock and snarled, "Fuck me hard!"

So, I fucked her hard. I began to slam into her mercilessly, my pelvic bone lashing at her clitoris and my balls slapping her thighs and labia. The head of my cock hit her cervix every time, and she would cry out increasingly. I moved up and grabbed her legs so that I could fuck her deeper and harder than before. Her breath was ragged, shallow, and mine was no better.

Looking at how hard she wanted me to fuck her, all the while moaning and asking for it harder, I tried to prolong it, but couldn't control the orgasm. She had began to tighten, but hadn't came. Spurt after spurt drained into her from my softening cock, and she groaned. I rolled off her, and what she did had me instantly hard again. Her hand snaked down her stomach, and she unabashedly began to let her cunt repeatedly swallow her curled fingers. She bucked once or twice before I got on top of her again and finished what I had started. I flipped her over on her stomach and lifted her to her knees and elbows.

Strategically, I plunged into her again. Over and over, until I felt her juices gushing from her. At first my hands worked independently on her, one running down her back, another cupping and pulling on her breast, twisting her nipples, another cupping her ass, then slapping it with a sting; then they both began to work together, gripping her hips, pulling her into me with more force than I hit her with alone. Ann finally cried out, and the walls of her pussy began to vibrate and tighten as she came. Every muscle in her body tensed, then let go. Her arms gave out beneath her, and I grabbed a large clump of her long hair, holding it in one hand like a reign, pulling her onto me for longer as I kept fucking her deep.

I filled her repeatedly, and she cried out as she neared a smaller second orgasm. She reached it, and it milked me as I came again in her, pouring my seed deep into her body.

She collapsed onto the bed, and I on top of her. After a few breaths, she rolled off the bed. I sat up slightly, leaning on an elbow. "Ann?"

Picking up her clothing, I heard her keys jingle. She threw her shirt and pants on haphazardly. "I'm going home. Thanks."

She kissed me long and deep, and if I would have been younger, I would have been hard again. "By the way, when I said how was the first kiss, I meant, how was my first kiss? Ever. Not just with you."

The next day at work she was just as cold has she had been for the past month. She did not initiate a conversation, nor even look my way. But when I went to punch at the time clock, I smelled her and felt a pussy grind into my ass, while a small hand reached around and grabbed me through my pants. She was gone before I could turn around, now physically impaired.

She came over again that night. She wore a skirt. Walked through the door, and as soon as it closed, she dropped to her knees and unzipped my pants, letting my erection meet the cool air. Knowing Ann, she might not have the physical experience, but if she already knew what she wanted while being a virgin, I could tell that she was the type that tried to relieve herself as best she could, and knew how to temper the flesh. She was a little sinner in her mind as she wrapped that hot mouth against my dick. At first she didn't try to take it all in, but after awhile, she knew I wanted her to, and let it go down as deep as possible.

After a few tries, she knew to swallow when the shaft reached a certain part of her throat. She sucked cock like a pro, and wasn't half bad at deep-throating. Especially for her first time. Finally, I couldn't take it, and let my fingers entangled in her tresses shove her face into my pubic hair. I began to ram my dick down her throat, fucking her face like her cunt the night before. I felt her groaning onto my shaft, and saw her hands under the skirt, moving fervently.