"I tell you, relationships are fucking stupid. It's hard enough finding a guy. But then they expect you to dote on them and treat them like a king just because they exist? Fuck that."
"No, don't fuck that. They don't deserve pussy. Let them get better acquainted with Rosie Palm and her five sisters."
Nikki and Sara both shared a laugh at the retort, swirling their drinks as they motioned. They were both on their second. The two friends were both enjoying the buzz that eased their spirits.
The bar had a decent crowd for a weekday evening. Aside from some of clusters of barflys and those who screamed 'usual patrons,' an increasingly boisterous group of middle-aged people sat at the larger table in the corner. Tonight gave the young women a chance to unwind with anonymity and blend-in without worry of being hounded or eavesdrops.
"I'll say it again, Nikki; I'm glad you left him. I didn't want to say anything while you were dating, but he was a bit of a leech."
Nikki raised her hand in the air to pause Sara as she sipped her drink, although the effort wasn't really needed. Sara was more than happy to let her friend get her most recent break-up off her chest.
"Leech is too nice a term. I mean, c'mon. Moving back in with your parents? How about canceling your twenty-whatever gaming subscriptions and ponying up the rent? And I know, matter-of-factly, that he could've picked up extra work hours to make ends meet. But no, he's got his guild and fucking shooters and shit. No time for work, barely any time for me, but God forbid he should put a controller down."
"I'll never understand why boys insist on playing games they're no good at."
The group in the corner burst out in laughter. Some unrestrained "Whooo!"s and a round of clapping exclaimed their tipsy merriment. Nikki turned her head, surveying the crowd. A work function of some sort, she surmised. At least they seemed happy.
"I know," Nikki said almost distantly, a slight sadness surfacing to her face. "And, like, what did I see in him? Someone I could mold? I mean, he said such nice things to woo me, and I really did feel special. But I couldn't see past his words that he was a just a slob meandering through life."
Nikki brought her drink to her lips. As she heard Sara's compassionate "Awws," she downed the rest of her drink, a forced gasp for breath at the end of her draw. In her mind, she ran through of all her other prior relationships. Of the duds. The dead-ends. How a world of potential was open at the start in every one - only to end in disillusionment.
"Every time I get involved, it's the same thing. They move forward to meet me, and I move forward too. And there's this potential for great things to happen between us. But then, nothing. We're just stuck numbly bumping into each other until it ends. I look around, and I see all this action happening around us. All these moving pieces. And I want to be part of the action!"
Nikki sighed, leaning back on her barstool. Sara swirled her drink, having taken another sip. As if compelled to offer a reply her friend simply mentioned, "You'll find yours. I'm a firm believer in that. You're too good a woman to be ignored for so long. You'll find a good one."
In her head, Nikki reflected that the good ones were already taken.
Another roar erupted from the corner of the bar. Nikki's eyes darted but she didn't turn her head. It was just a mere distraction from her own pity-party. How friends like Sara had found theirs. How easy it seemed for others to be happy and move on with life. And here she was, left behind. Hanging with the rabble.
Then, as if a switch were thrown, Nikki's mindset flipped. Her eyes stared off into the space in front of her friend. The words came to her mouth as the thoughts formulated in her mind. "Maybe I just need to change my game. I wait back, waiting to be approached before playing. Maybe I should just... play."
A moment passed, the background chatter of the bar permeating the silence between them. Finally Sara spoke up. "You going to be okay, honey?"
Nikki turned her eyes towards her friend's. Their eye contact ensured that they were still besties and that things would be fine. A small chuckle escaped from Nikki. "Yeah. I'll be fine. Thanks for being here tonight.'
Sara came in to give her friend a hug. It wasn't until her friend reached into her purse to leave a tip that Nikki realized her friend was getting ready to leave.
"Finished already?"
"Yeah. Two drinks, like I said. I can't pack it away like I used to. Besides, there is work tomorrow. And I don't want to keep Mark waiting long." She paused. "But I do want you to be ok. Text me if anything happens tonight."
"I'll be fine. You'll be the first to know if anything happens. Don't wait up."
Nikki also arose from her stool to give her friend one last hug. A large contingency from the lively group in the corner also seemed to be milling about, some making their way to the exit. Wishes of "See you next time!" and "Good luck!" shouted from the parting crowd. Sara, too, then made with the throng and left to the chilly night air.
As she decided how best to proceed with her evening, she glanced her attention to the once raucous corner. A man remained seated, smiling, holding his empty glass. He was chatting with two other couples. All middle-aged and professional looking, although obviously relaxed having put away a few pints. She watched as the five chatted. Secretly she admired what they had. A good rapport, if only at a work level. Nikki continued to watch as the couples departed, leaving the man alone at the table.
He wore an air of confidence about him. His hair was professional but lively. He had a decent physique - no doubt escaping home to put hours in at a gym. The attire and tie, now hung loosely around his neck, spoke that he worked a position in sales or management, Nikki figured.
She was having fun picking apart and figuring out her target from a distance. Nikki caught herself smiling as he glanced across the bar and locked eyes with hers. She simply watched, expecting him to nod or move on or something. So she was tickled when their moment's exchange resulted in a kind chuckle from him.
Instinctively, on a whim, she patted the barstool where her friend Sara had been seated moments ago. She watched as he slightly cocked his head, an eyebrow partially raised. Then, with a body language that said, "Sure, why not?" the man stood up and made his way to the Nikki, one arm coming to rest on the countertop next to her.
"Care to buy a girl a drink?"
"Oh, no, I shouldn't. I was planning to take off soon anyway."
"Oh, don't be so coy. Allow me." Nikki quickly flagged the attention of the bartender and turned back to her guest. "So, what will it be?"
The man paused. Perhaps it was being put on the spot. Maybe Nikki flicking her hair did some work. Whatever the reason, it gave Nikki the time to muster the courage to continue her pursuit. "I just wanna chat for a bit about what you and your friends were celebrating earlier."
"Ah, yeah. That was a retirement party for Lester. Yeah," he replied, an eagerness in his voice. He turned his attention to the bartender. "Whiskey sour, please."
"Make that two, thank you," Nikki followed, placing a bill on the countertop.
Making himself comfortable, the gentleman seated himself on the stool next to Nikki. "Yeah, good old Lester. A bit of a retirement get together for him, you know? Just a way to see him off."
"Oh, that's nice!"
"Yeah, yeah it was," he said. "One of the 'Old Guard'. Kind of a dying breed." He thanked the barkeep for his drink and took a sip. "Lester was one of a kind. He will be missed."
"It's good to see him off. It's nice that he had people at work like that."
"Where are my manners?" the man abruptly said, in a joking manner. "The name's Ryan."
"Nicole, hi."
"A pleasure to meet you Nicole. Although, I can't imagine you asked me over here about out little outing tonight."
"Well, I'd be lying if I said you didn't catch my eye," Nikki said, shooting Ryan a smile. "You have a bit of pep to you. Like the weight of the world hasn't crushed your spirit yet. I just wanna chat with you," she said with a shrug, taking her own sip from her glass.
His eyes were sizing her up. In Nikki's mind a flurry of reasons as to why exploded in her head. Did he think she was crazy? Was he objectifying her? Maybe he thought she was a whore?
"Well, that's right kind of you," he eventually replied, taking a sip of his own. "Let's not get any rash ideas though. For starters," he said, lifting up his left hand. He wiggled his fingers back and forth, in an effort to get Nikki to notice his wedding band.
"What? A man and a woman can't have a civil chat in this day and age?"
"Well," he said, turning and squaring himself towards Nikki. "Two people can harmlessly chat. Sure. But, well ... you have to be, what, half my age, if not more?"
"What's wrong with that?" Nikki coyly replied. "A gal can't like someone older than her? Maybe 'older' and 'taken' gets my motor running."
Ryan chuckled, all the while keeping his eyes fixed on Nikki's. She shot him a look back. She was playful in her response. But she was serious. That he was spoken for and over twice her age was no longer a concern for her. Not in this mindset. As Ryan read Nikki's determination in her eyes, his smiling chuckle deflated.
"Well, I am flattered", he said, raising his drink in a mock toast. "But, seriously?"
"What? You're handsome. Accomplished. It strikes me that you've got a lot going for you. That's attractive to a woman. And hello," she said, pointing both hands toward herself.
Ryan laughed. "Forward too!"
