I met Paul nearly a year ago. He's a very special man; not like anyone else I've ever met. He's handsome, charming, sexy, gentle and caring. He's incredibly intelligent and yet so down-to-earth and easy to talk to. He has a fabulous sense of humor. Nobody can make me laugh like he can. Never in my life have I felt as comfortable with anyone as I feel with him. When I'm with him, I am free to be who I really am. It has been years since I trusted anyone enough to share any of myself with them, especially a man. But with him, it's different. I was so drawn to him from the very first time I met him. I trust him completely. I can talk to him about anything. I know that, no matter what I tell him, he won't think any less of me. With him, I could live out all of my fantasies and I want to help him live out all of his.
Okay, so I'm crazy about him. He tells me not to fixate on him. I know he's right, so I try not to think about him too much. That's pretty difficult though. There are so many places and everyday things that bring him to mind: that motel, this park, that special "toy" store, red convertible mustangs, peanut M&M's, crab dip, the Cleveland Indians. . .the list goes on and on. There's so much shit going on in my life right now that I succeed in keeping my mind off of him the majority of the day. . .of course, you only need 51% to make a "majority," right?
Then I go to bed at night. Laying there in the dark, I close my eyes and I can see him just as clearly as if he's right there with me. The soft dark blonde hair, warm smile, slightly graying beard, and those eyes. . .oh, those eyes! Sometimes they look brown, sometimes they look hazel, but they're always gorgeous and incredibly sexy!!
I spread my thighs slightly; in reality for my own probing, teasing fingers, but in my fantasy I open myself up for him: his fingers, his tongue, his hard dick. He's right there with me all night, in my dreams. Here's one of them:
I sat quietly on the park bench, looking out over the water. It was lovely and peaceful here. I could almost forget all my troubles. I closed my eyes and tilted my head back, letting the warmth of the sun wash over my face. In my mind, I could see him sitting right next to me, smiling and talking. God, how I miss him!
"I miss you. . ." I said, barely above a whisper.
"Do you?" I heard a voice behind me say.
I was startled. I thought I was alone here. I knew that voice! But it couldn't be him, could it? My eyes flew open and I turned to see him standing there, hands in pockets, wearing khaki shorts, a yellow t-shirt and a playful smile.
In an instant I was in his arms. I held him tight, afraid that if I let go he would disappear before my eyes like a mirage. I clung to him, taking in his scent.
Tears of joy slid slowly down my face. Before long, I was sobbing.
"Hey, what's all this?" he said.
"I thought I'd never see you again. . ." I said. "What are you doing here?"
"I was in the neighborhood. . ." he said casually.
"How long can you stay?" I asked.
"I have all day for you." he replied.
We sat on the bench for a while, catching up on what had been going on in our lives since we last saw each other.
After a while, we decided to go for a drive. As I sat on the passenger side, I turned sideways in the seat so I could watch him as he drove.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked.
"Just making a mental picture for later." I said.
