Pat's Fantasies

Patricia was driving through the morning traffic, headed to her boyfriend's apartment for a quick breakfast before she had to go to work. She smiled at the thought of being with him. The thought of his arms around her, his kisses, his smell, his love for her. She didn't understand how it had happened or why, but she was falling in love with him.. She had sworn that after her second divorce, she would never get involved again.. It had taken her daughter away from her, it had caused her untold financial damages, and now... here she was, transferred to a store in a new area, 150 miles from her daughter, closer than she had been but not as close as she liked..

She thought back to the first time she saw him... She was working the cash register, it was a semi slow day so far, the customers had been polite and even friendly that day. She had just finished a rather large order for a woman who couldn't decide on how to pay, first offering a credit card, then changing to another card, then thinking about using a check, and then finally back to her first credit card. She had not lost her cool, and even though others in the line were mumbling things, she kept a smile on her face. Finally the lady had left, and there was a gentleman in the line who was next, he smiled and she rang up his sandwich and cold drink. He was very polite, and he even asked her how she was doing. He seemed like a nice guy. And then he was gone. They day continued and she hadn't even thought about it again.

The next day was busy. She was working as fast as she could, about 10am she was again running the register, and all of a sudden it just slowed to a crawl. She turned to have a drink of her water that she kept in a bottle right behind her on the shelf, as she turned back, there he was... and again, a smile, his how are you question, and he was only getting a sandwich and a soda. This time it was slower, and he took a minute to engage her in idle chitchat. Things like, What's new, Have you lived here long, do you like the weather here, just simple little mean nothing questions. He seemed to actually listen to her answers, not just out of politeness, but it seemed like he was paying attention to her, and what she said.

They chatted for a few more minutes, and he stated that he had to get back to work, and that he would see her later. That he worked upstairs and that it was nice meeting and chatting with her. He smiled at her and walked away. Pat as she preferred to be called, was wondering why she hadn't even asked him his name. Was it because she didn't want to get close to someone, was it because if she knew his name, that they would become friends. She didn't want to think about it, and put it out of her mind. And went back to work...

As she continued to drive, she wondered how he had slipped past the walls she had put up, the purposeful mental and physical blocks she had erected to keep people distant. Yet, here she was, falling in love, wanting to be with him, and yet, afraid of the worst. Afraid that everything would work out perfectly for awhile, and that he would tire of her, tire of her lack of sexual desire, her lack of passion, and her feeling of worthlessness.

Yet, when he kissed her, they would kiss and kiss for what seemed like hours, only last night she reminisced. She had gotten into her car, and rolled down the window. He had leaned in and kissed her, putting one arm around her shoulders, his other arm around her waist, holding her safely, snugly, and his kiss, passionate, warm, loving, wanting her. She returned the kiss, stiffly at first, and then the warmth from him breaking through, flooding her thoughts and body with the feeling of love, warmth, need and desire. It lasted what seemed like hours, when he pulled back, she noticed the clock on the dash. It had been only 15 minutes.

"OH my god", she thought, how can he do this to me? His kisses made her so wet, sent tremors of desire through her entire body, she wanted more, and as if she had voiced this thought out loud, he leaned in and kissed her again. This time she wanted to pull away, not to stop, but to get out of the car and to go back into his apartment, to have him take her there, take her to his bed, to have him make love to her, to kiss her all over, to caress her body. He loved to go down on her, he would lick her and kiss her and suck on her and do all kinds of things that got her so wet, so excited... A few times she even experienced small orgasms from his kissing and touching. But she wouldn't submit to these feelings, she wouldn't get out of the car. But the kiss continued, and it was good... so good, so wonderfully tender, yet fulfilling, she put her arms around his neck and held him close. Returning his kiss with warmth, feeling and yes, even some love.

Pat was thinking all of this, and then realized she was sitting in the car, sitting in a parking space in front of his apartment, she was here, how long she didn't know, but the engine was off, the heat of the sun already warming up the inside of the car. She grabbed her water bottles, her purse, and her keys, and got out, walked to the door. She shivered from her toes to her head. And then shook herself. Then she opened the door and went in.

He was just stepping out of the kitchen, plates in hand as she walked in. He placed the plates on the table, turned and walked to her. He placed his hands around her waist and pulled her to him. He kissed her tenderly and quickly, and then pulled away and held the chair for her; he took the water bottles to the kitchen to be filled later, when she had to leave for work. Pat thought quickly of how wonderful he was, how he almost anticipated her needs, her desires. He poured her coffee, and placed it in front of her, he served her scrambled eggs, with toast and jelly, diced potatoes fried in a skillet with small diced bell peppers, and seasoning. She had come to enjoy his cooking, and enjoyed the fact that he would fix her something to eat, as she so often found it a bother to stop to fix something for herself.

And, he was a good cook. She remembered the dinner he fixed on their "one year" anniversary. Stir fry vegetables, cooked in an electric wok. Teriyaki chicken breast strips grilled tender, juicy, and so wonderfully moist and sweet. The sparkling cider to drink, the table cloth and cloth dinner napkins, the candles, the low lighting. So romantic, so warm, so thoughtful. And yet, they have never spoken of this being a "relationship", they had been seeing each other for a year now, and had even made love a few times... It had been her idea. But after the dinner. They talked over coffee, played a little cards, and just sat and enjoyed being with each other.

He turned on his computer, he logged onto a web page, and told her to click on a picture of a rose, she walked to the computer, sat down and had clicked on the rose. There in front of her was a small airplane, snoopy was flying it, and it looked just like the comic strip. But something was different. There behind the plane was a banner. Just like the planes have over the beach, or that she had seen flying over the amusement parks when she was a young girl in California... the banner had writing, and as it moved across the screen she read it. Tears welling up in her eyes. it read: "Yes Pat, I do LOVE you... Very, Very much..."

There it was in big bold letters, he was telling her what she already knew, and that she already knew she felt about him but was afraid to tell him. And with tears in her eyes, she turned to him, and saw tears in his eyes too. They came together holding each other, stroking each other's back. Wanting to not be the first to speak, they both just held on to the other not daring to speak.

The breakfast was excellent, and she wanted to just sit and enjoy being there with him, but she had to go to work. It was his day off and she knew that he was going to run some errands, bring her some lunch at her lunch break, then come home and wash and wax her car, then do whatever he needed to do and when it was time for her to get off he would either pick her up, or she would walk to his apartment. Less than a block. Not very far, and she enjoyed the short walk. today, she mentioned that she would walk today, so he didn't need to come for her. He filled the two bottles for her with water in one and Gatorade in the other. It was going to be a very hot day there in Tucson, and she knew she needed to keep drinking or she would get sick. She had before, and he had been there for her. She had come over for lunch as she was working a later shift, and had gotten sick on the way over, she had not use the A/C in the car, she didn't think it was all that hot. But by the time she got there she was not feeling good, and couldn't even think about eating the toast and coffee he had made.

She grabbed the bottles, now filled, and as he reached for her, she came willingly to him, the kisses. They were making her want to do something other than go to work. Something other than just standing here in his kitchen. She wanted to put the bottles down, to take him to the bedroom to kneel down in front of him to undo his pants, to be on her knees, licking and sucking him, to pleasure him. To give him the best effort she could, to swallow him, and his seed, she wanted to do for him, what he had done so often to her. To make his knees weak, to make him hers. To commit so completely and powerfully to show him that she did love him, that she wanted only him, to be his, to have him make love to her all day long, but this would have to wait, she needed to go to work.

She pulled away, she grabbed her purse, gave him the keys, and kissed him briefly, then walked the block to work, her knees still weak from the kisses, but she had to work, had to show herself and everyone in her past, that she could do it on her own. All by herself. As she walked into the store, she was all composed, a professional. Work oriented. Not even thinking about him or what had transpired. All day long she worked putting nothing into her mind except work, and how she was looking forward to seeing her daughter that weekend.

To be continued...