We have been emailing back and forth for months, friendly banter, and sometimes useless blah just to fill a screen. We write about our families, and our daily lives, every once in a while some gentle flirting, or innuendo.
We knew each other well at one time, together for the better part of our high school careers. We spent every available moment together. Time and real life separated us, from being "us". Neither of us forgot the other, even as our separate marriages and lives drew on. We were each other's first for many things, most involving some stage of intimacy. I can still remember everything about each of those nights.
During our emails you mention a business trip you are off to in the coming weeks. I ask the basic questions of where, when, and for what; mostly just for conversation. My new job sends me off traveling a couple times a year, so I'm always curious. When you respond back I look at my own calendar. Our schedules collide, overlapping conference dates in Orlando. My heart flutters a bit. I sit in my chair wondering if I should tell you. I always feel like a freak when I appear too eager. I slowly type a response, and hesitantly click the send button, still worried about rejection. I give you my dates and times, and where I am staying.
Even with the size of Orlando we are actually pretty close, a short Taxi ride looks like it. I research the local restaurants, something nice, not screaming romance, but quiet. I email you back and we agree. I rearranged my travel plans to add an extra night, telling my wife that the meeting plans had changed. I wanted to make sure that something with work didn't arise to foul our plans.
My heart has raced from the time we arranged to meet. My mind has skipped to the times where some part of you was naked or nearly so. When we were younger I wasn't ready, and you never found a way to open me up. I wanted to please you; sometime I was successful, oftentimes not. It wasn't until we were apart that you told me your needs and desires. I have pondered them over and over, but this is not what we are meeting for. We both agreed an early friendly dinner, platonic! That hasn't stopped my head from spinning all week though.
My meetings finish as scheduled, and I am left with time to get ready. I take a shower and my mind wanders. I end up pleasuring myself hoping that will help me shift gears. I know it's going to be tough, because all I can think about in that steaming shower are moments where you have been there with me. I spend my load and wash up, and then I turn the dial to frigid in hopes of cooling off. The trick works for now, and my mind clears. I begin to create a platonic topic list in my mind. Working through the conversations I search for ways to extend them.
I finish getting ready and look myself over in the mirror. My dress pants, shirt and tie are all freshly pressed; my shoes are shined to a tight gloss. Military school taught me well. I've gained a couple pounds over the years, but my clean cut appearance looks good. My hair is tightly buzzed, and my face clean shaven. The hotel desk calls up to tell me that my car has arrived.
My tendencies to be early haven't changed; I arrive before you and am seated at a private table. I order myself a double, hoping it will calm me down. When the drink arrives I take a long pull looking forward to the intoxicate helping. The seconds feel like minutes, I realized that I am checking my watch every 15 seconds. I tell myself repeatedly "plutonic"; however my mind is flashing back like a movie clip show through our times together. Many of the memories that are flashing before me are not plutonic.