"Where is the damn AC Remote?" I muttered under my breath.
It was a 'summer afternoon', two of the most beautiful words in the English language. And probably most harmonious sound for an English ear. But not for an Indian ear. It was a coastal place in Odisha. The weather was a pain in the ass.
We studied coastal climates, about how the climate tends to be moderate. Either that was a lie or it's fucking global warming.
"There it is. Found you son of a bitch." The sense of relief was real. I had already started imagining the cold air on my body. Got rid of my shirt. I threw myself on the bed. Closed my eyes for a few seconds and unlocked my phone. There was a notification from Tinder.
My relationship with Tinder is quite complicated. Recently I have come to terms with 'tinde' (apple gourd), But not Tinder. A handful of matches and invisible yet visible amount of rejection. And this was the 3rd time I installed Tinder with high hopes.
Got a couple of matches. I mean men will be men. You can find pretty girls and feel like your self-esteem drop every minute you spent here. What a lovely combination. It was a reply. Finally a reply after three days. But I'll take it.
"So, you like Anime, huh?" (Me)
"Yes, Do you have any favorites?"
"Why did you assume that I like Anime?"
"I just got that vibe from you."
"From texts?"
"Yes."
"I like Naruto and Death Note. What are your favorite animes?"
"I like *bunch of anime that I have never heard before*"
Note: The only reason I could not quite catch the anime name is the fact that I have only watched three anime in my life. And I had to improvise the conversation based on those anime. Good luck with that.
"How's your day going?" (Me)
"It's boring. I have nothing to do. What about you?"
"I have work to do. I just don't want to do it."
It sure was a boring day. I thought let's do something interesting. And asking her out on a date could be a good idea. But it makes me look desperate. Nervousness started kicking in. Maybe because of the fact that It would be my first date ever. Will she say yes? What if she thinks I am desperate?
All these thoughts kept crawling in my head before I even asked her out. Boy, was I proud of my overthinking? Fuck it, man, I am bored. What's the worst that could happen? She will decline my request and I'll be embarrassed. Then I'll add this to the list of shitty decisions I have made in my life till now.
Take a deep breath, take a deep breath you asshole.
"So what do you prefer? Coffee or pizza?
"Why not pizza with coffee sauce?"
Oh boy, felt like I found my soul mate. Not because I like that combination. Solely because most of the girls on Tinder are pretty boring to talk to. And finding a girl with weird food ideas was just what I needed.
"Do you want to meet up and get something to eat? Like pizza?" (Me)
"I'd rather have biriyani."
"I like you already."
"Save that for later. How about we meet at the beach? At 5 pm?"
"Alright, sounds good. Here is my number **********, give me a call when you reach there."
"See you there."
Don't be surprised. The beach was very crowded. And I think she was a really adventurous girl. Which she was. That will come later. After finishing up some work, took a bath. Put on a t-shirt and shorts, which was quite long. I definitely did not want to fill my jeans pockets with sand no matter what.
4.15 PM. The weather was quite nice after the arrival of unexpected clouds. Got in my car and started the short journey towards the destination. Parked my car, took a seat on the beach and waited for her. I was sweating a little. The matter of concern was what if she stood me up. Waited for 10 more minutes.
My phone started to ring. It was an unknown number. I answered it. Her voice was sweet. Maybe I am being overdramatic. But look at it from a virgin's point of view. She sounded sweet. She was there, near the bench. She was waving at me. I got up.
She said, "Hi."
"Hi, there." And it was a half hug. An awkward one. God, kill me, please. Let me explain here real quick. She was a dusky looking girl wearing glasses. Height around 5.8, A little curvy. And she was beautiful. Not like those girls in the magazines. She was beautiful the way she smiled.
"Sorry, I am late," She said with a smile.
"It's fine. I am just happy that you did not ghost me."
"I was pretty bored, Decided why not? But I will leave you if I see any handsome faces here."
"Are you implying that I am not handsome enough?"
"What do you think? Are you?"
"Maybe."
"Don't worry, I was just messing with you."
We talked. We talked for half an hour. Then slowly I started getting uncomfortable. Something's wrong. I was aroused. And it started showing its behavior. I looked down at it while talking with her. This is not right. It's too soon. It was my stomach. It started growling.
I knew I should have eaten something before I came here. Now I am hungry. And it's too soon for her to witness my creepy eating style. Let's be honest. No one, absolutely no one, wants to see their first date pouncing on a chicken leg like a hungry wolf. It's not attractive. I mean it is for me.
But I am not sure what normal people think.
"What? You hungry?" She asked with a sly smile.
"Yes, are you?"
"Always. What do you want to eat?"
"You choose."
So we ordered two biriyanis, fried chicken and some gravy. Now folks if you want to order food now instead of reading this story, go ahead. I understand. And I respect your priorities. Our natural instincts took over. We both realized that our spirit animal is a hungry wolf.
We shredded those chicken's leg just like you shred gift wrappers when you are impatient. Paid the bill. Pure bliss. I'd rather sniff biriyani aroma than an Axe deodorant.
"I must say. I was a little hesitant before eating biriyani in front of you. Crushing the bone like an animal is not the prettiest sight to witness. I am sorry if it left a scar on your memory," she said.
"Arey, don't be so self-conscious. All that matters is we erased the existence of those legs without harming the chicken."
Time flew by. Another half-hour passed in a flash. It was very unlikely of me. Babbling for a long time without getting weird and nervy. And I was quite happy about it. We talked about our ambitions, plans, friends, etc. She had a smile on her face throughout the conversation.
There was silence for a minute. We both stopped for a moment and gazed at the ocean. So calm. The beach was getting empty. It was time for us to return home. After a moment we both looked at each other and we realized that it's time to depart for today.
"It's getting late. We should head home," I said.
"Yes. We should," She smiled.
"Should I drop you home?"
"Nah, It's fine. Don't worry."
I did not insist. Because I had to get back to my home too. We bid farewell. And a perfect hug. Yes. Score. She gave me a warm smile. I was staring at her till she boarded the bus. It was not love, just admiration. I received a message as soon as I got back.
"People must be thinking of you as a creep the way you were staring at me."
I never realized that she caught me staring at her. Maybe I was too busy thinking about her while staring at her that I didn't notice.