TV On The Blink
It was the middle of summer and the evening air hung moist and dense. Lila had been outside all day, tending to her flowers and gingerly yanking weeds with her roughened bare fingers. As the shadows grew longer, she realized that her fatigue outweighed her desire for the perfect flowerbed. She slowly rose to a stand, cringing from the pain in her back - a telling sign that she had labored on her knees too long.
She put away the tools and sighed at the stairs she needed to climb to get into her house. They appeared taller now, due to her lack of energy, but she managed to scale each one carefully. The crisp conditioned air of Lila's kitchen hit her like a cool mountain breeze, and she slumped into the first chair she found. She decided that she'd better not sit for long, for fear of never being able to stand again.
As Lila ambled down the hallway towards her bedroom, she methodically peeled away her sweat-laden clothes. She couldn't wait to take a shower, but the walk to the bathroom seemed endless. She was already rehearsing how the hot, pulsating water would feel on her back before she had finished undressing. She stepped into the tub and the moment the water hit her, her green eyes widened and she fell into a trance. She'd showered perhaps 10,000 times in her life, but none had felt as tremendous as this. She just stood still, almost not breathing, allowing the force of the water to penetrate deep within her muscles. Had she been able to lie down and sleep, she would have.
Twenty minutes later, the water stopped and Lila exited the tub. She dried caressingly with a soft pink towel. Her hair was freshly washed and smelled of coconut. She wrapped the towel around her and walked back into her bedroom, falling gracefully on her bed. Grabbing the remote control, she aimed it at the blank screen of her television set and stabbed the "on" button. Nothing happened. She held the remote control closer to the screen and re-punched the button. Again, the screen stayed black. She pulled herself to her feet and walked over to the set. She pressed the power button on the front and waited. No picture appeared.
"Crap...", Lila muttered under her breath. She flung the remote onto the floor and flopped back onto her pillow. She closed her eyes in the realization that she'd have to shell out at least $100 to have a repairman come to fix the set.
"Crap, crap, crap..."
Energized by this new stress, Lila stomped towards the kitchen to retrieve the phone book. She flipped through the yellow pages, cursing repeatedly, until she settled upon the page entitled "Television repair services". She ran her index finger down the length of the page and settled upon a name and number. The name belonged to a company she'd seen before on tv (when it had worked) and the ads always showed a tall and very handsome man performing a repair at a residence. Lila knew immediately that this had to be an actor used only for the purposes of advertising, and that in the event she ever did call this company, they'd likely send over a balding, beer-bellied little man named Norman or Harold. Still, the company had succeeded in winning her notice, so she dialed the number.
The lady at the other end of the line assured Lila that a repairman was available and would soon be on his way. She added that the service call would cost $75 dollars just to diagnose the problem and that any repairwork would be extra. Lila faked her happy understanding and gave her home address to the lady. When she hung up, her forced smile faded into a frown. She rolled her eyes at the promise of spending the rest of a Saturday with "Norman" and his hairy butt-crack. If he showed at all.
Before she had even put away her dinner plate, the doorbell rang. Stunned, Lila peeked through the cracked door to find the handsome stranger standing on her porch. So stunned in fact, that she forgot that she was clad only in her bath towel as she tried to place his familiar face.
"Oh....um...um....hello. Can I.....help you?"
The man briefly stopped smiling, "Well, I hope I can help you. I'm Lance from TV's R Us. I'm here to see about your TV set. You were expecting me..... weren't you?"
Blushing, and suddenly finding her voice again, Lila exclaimed, "Oh my, yes. That was really fast. Yes, please do come in. The t.v. set is back in my bedroom. I'll show you the way."
Lance was smiling at her again, "Thank you. I actually was headed home. We're neighbors really, I live down Market a little ways. This is a great house."
Lance wiped his feet at the door and stepped carefully into the foyer. Lila mentally noted the subtle attention to care that Lance has for her home. She immediately surveys the man from head to toe and is dumbfounded to discover that this is the SAME good-looking man who appears on the TV commercials.
Lila stood, hand on hip, staring at his eyes. "Excuse me... are you REALLY a repairman? I mean, I don't want to offend you or anything, but you ARE the person on those commercials, right?"
He grinned, obviously used to this, "Yes ma'am, one and the same. I kept telling them that I don't know how to act, but they insisted on casting me in the advertisements. It was quite embarrassing. Acting isn't my job. Fixing t.v. sets and other things - that's what I do best."
Lila didn't move. She still couldn't pull away from his gaze. "Well, that's really kind of impressive, if you ask me. I mean,....you.... are the reason that I called your company. So, when you think about it, you did a great job in the commercial."
"Thank you very much. Really. Ummm....your t.v. set?"
"Oh yes! Of course! You know, I forget myself, if I don't watch it." Rolling her eyes after she turns away, Lila turns to lead him down the hallway to her bedroom. Lance followed her, but can't see her grinning from ear to ear. Upon entering the bedroom, Lila points to the poor t.v. set. Lance walks over to the entertainment center and immediately begins to work.
For the first time, Lila was aware that she is wearing only a towel. Mortified she looked around the room to see if she could nonchalantly pick up something to cover herself. Spying nothing obvious, she turned to see if she can slip by Lance to enter the walk-in closet.
Lance has set aside the heavy tool-bag he has been holding. His repair shirt fit tightly over his well-conditioned body. He is quite tall, tanned and fit. His rugged good looks work well with his boyish charm. Lila feels a slight twinge of excitement as she watches him work. He is kneeling now, starting to check wires on the back of the set.....
Suddenly, Lance stands and turns toward her. The charming innocence he displayed at the front door has been taken over by a pair of dark, wanton eyes. Lila sees the sense of urgency in his stare and knows immediately that he wants her. He lunges forward and sweeps her up into his strong, muscled arms. Lila is overcome with a deep warmth as Lance presses his lips onto hers. His tongue pries her lips apart and seeks her mouth in a fiery assault. The pure, unbridled lust which Lance now exudes is so powerful that Lila fears she might faint in his arms. The rooms begins to spin and darken. From the confines of the darkness, Lila hears a voice. It's a voice that she knows, but it is not her own. She can't understand the words and she continues to spin faster into the void which is now only Lance kissing her deeper and deeper. Faster and faster the room is spinning, and then without explanation, it stops. The fog clears and Lila hears the voice quite clearly now.
"It's unplugged."
Lila stared at him, "Oh......oh....um....excuse me?"
Lance grins and darts his eyes to the rise and fall of her chest. Quickly, he looks her in the eye again as if he's remembered something and replied, "The set. It was unplugged."
Lila clears her vision to see Lance standing across from her. The t.v. set is on behind him. He is not kissing her. In fact, he's not even close, but he has a concerned look on his face.
"Are you okay?"
