On Feeling Needed

"I wonder if there is any more popcorn?" I asked my friend Sara from the small kitchen in our hotel room.

"Top cabinet, right hand side," she yelled back to me.

Sara and I have been friends for many years, and try to meet once a month for a girls night out, or some type of get together. This month we headed for a weekend in the city to do some Christmas shopping together, and decided to stay in small hotel on the outskirts of town.

"Found it!" I yelled back. Standing in the kitchen, I was thinking to myself how happy I was to be away from home for the weekend and finding time to finally relax. Things had been hectic at work, and I was in the middle of a separation from my husband Tom. After 4 years of a dismal marriage, we had decided to separate with the mutual goal of getting a divorce. There were lots of issues, and sex always seemed to be added to my list of cons. It met my basic needs, but after awhile, I just felt like something was missing and Tom never seemed the least bit interested in perusing making it better. Tom was the only man I had ever been with, so I had no comparisons, unless I considered what I saw in movies and what friends shared with me of their own experiences. AND if these counted, then I knew I was missing something.

"Finally!" Sara said as I handed her the full bowl of hot popcorn.

"Good grief. It takes a few minutes to pop." I chuckled. "What are you watching?" I asked sitting down next to her on the sofa.

"One of your basic porn flicks these hotels have to offer." Sara said.

"Oh good, I am in just the mood to see others enjoying the things I am missing in my life," I told her.

Sara grabbed the control and lowered the volume and turned to me and asked, "Was he that bad in the sack, Liz?"

"Lets just say I with all the batteries I used over the years, I could have lit a small city with them had they been put all together." I said with a small laugh.

Sara grabbed my hand and said, "I am really sorry. No one deserves so much unhappiness."

Sara was such a dear friend, and one who was lucky in love. She and her girlfriend Tammy had been together for about 10 years and were very much in love. Both professional workers, they owned their own home, and were now thinking of adopting a baby together. They truly were the perfect couple, by some peoples standards. I adored them both.

"There’s nothing I can do but try to found happiness elsewhere," I said.

We sat in quiet and watched the movie. Both of us loved watching porn and could always find humor in it. Tonight however all I seemed to see were couples engaging in incredible sex, and wanted desperately to know what that was like. The couple on the screen was involved in the act of oral sex, and it seemed as if he couldn’t get enough of her. He devoured her pussy as if his life depended on it. Tom never made me feel like that. He made me feel as if it was merely one of the steps he did in the whole act of sex. First I kiss her, then I stroke her breasts, eat her a little, and then fuck her. Never missing one of the steps, clicking through the list in his head as the event unfolded. What was it like to be wanted that much? I sat and wondered if Sara and Liz made each other feel that needed. Did they go down on each other with such passion?

"Sara? Can I ask you a question? I asked.

"Sure, what’s up?" she asked.

"Oh nothing, never mind." I now hesitated and thought to myself, what an idiot, you can’t ask that.

"What’s on your mind girl?" she asked.

"Well I kind of feel funny asking, but I really would like to know something." I said

"You know you can ask me anything" Sara said.

"It’s just in watching this movie, I feel as if I have missed out on some pretty incredible oral sex a long the way, and I am wondering if you and Liz. Uh, do you…"

"Eat each other out with that much zest?" Sara quickly helped me out.

"Uh yeah" was all I could mutter. "I know it’s a damn personal question, but watching they way he goes down on her I feel like Tom never had that much interest in me like that. I guess I am just wondering if everyone in the world is having better oral sex.."

Sara chuckled and said, "Liz makes me feel like she can’t live without being nourished by my pussy, and I think I make her feel the same way."

"Tom wasn’t into going down on you?" she asked.

"Lets just say he made me feel like it was on the checklist of things he had to do during sex." I told her. "I got off, but I just don’t think he really wanted to be there, if you know what I mean." I added.

"That’s too bad. I wouldn’t personalize it though. I am sure you have a delicious pussy. He just missed out."

I blushed as Sara said that and returned to watching the movie. The subject was dropped and we spent the rest of the evening doing our usual game of finding humor in the movie.

We both went to bed, and Sara was quick to fall sleep in the next bed, but I laid there thinking about Sara and Liz engaged in oral sex. I visualized them doing 69, and devouring each other in passionate embraces. I had wondered on occasion what it would be like to be with another woman, but never with Sara. She would always be a good friend, but never a lover of mine in my fantasies. I then fell into deep fantasy as I thought about one of the actresses in the movie going down on me. As I lay there, I could feel a dampness grow between my legs and now wished I had my vibrator with me. As I thought about the gorgeous blonde licking my pussy, my hand soon found its way to my wetness, and I began to stroke my clit.

In my head the blonde and I are watching porn together and she comes over to me and pushes me back on the couch and begins kissing me, her tongue darting in and out of my mouth. Her assertive behavior is so erotic to me. She pulls up my shirt and begins sucking on my nipple. I feel overwhelmed, but cannot move. The surges of pleasure make me shiver. I’m drawn to her.

"I want you badly." She tells me.

Her mouth continues to suck on my nipples, making them so hard. I wonder if they have ever been this hard before? Her tongue seems to expertly lick and tease each nipple. Her hands know how to caress each breast. She senses my lack of expertise.

"Relax, let me really enjoy your first."

I think to myself, she is really hot for me. I can feel the wetness grow and grow.

I leave the fantasy briefly as I hear Sara stir, and hope I have not been too loud with my occasional moan. I cannot believe how wet I am. My clit seems so swollen to me, my pussy so smooth to my touch. It’s like I am discovering myself for the first time. I insert a finger in my pussy and try to squeeze the walls around it. This feels so good….

Back in my head, the blonde is now licking my belly button. I know she is heading for soaked pussy and I can’t wait. I lift my hips and attempt to take off my panties.

"Not yet," she says.

I put my bottom down. I hope she isn’t going to tease me. I need to feel her mouth on my pussy. The intenseness of this need for her to go down on me was so overwhelming, so new. I could feel her stroke my mound through my panties, and again I feel the need to lift my hips to push me in her direction. I want her to know I want her. I need her to know how much I want her to need me. My panties are drenched. She moves her face over me, and I can hear her breath deeply.

"You are so ready, so inviting to me." She tells me. Her fingers trace my slit through my panties.

"Ohhh please lick me," I beg her, again lifting my hips towards her.

"Shhh, I will, in time."

The lust I have for her, is growing as well. I want to touch her back. I want to know what is like to be with her, to please her.

She begins to lick my panties. This is so erotic. I have never had anyone enjoy me more. Her fingers move under the elastic edge, and seek out my wetness. She rubs her finger up and down my slit, collecting my wetness. Removing her finger from my panties, I watch as she brings her finger to her mouth to lick it.

"Mmmmm, you are so delicious. I can taste the need you have for me." She tells me. I look in her eyes. I am not sure I recognize the look of someone who really wants to be with me, who really needs me.

I can hear Sara breathing, and wonder how she would taste. I have never thought of Sara like this before and the feelings are new to me. I cannot seem to put the thoughts aside though. I know she is so in love with Liz, and might not return any gestures I might make. I don’t need any more rejection. I’m safer with the blonde in my head. I can feel my clit swelling as I rub it. I am comfortable with pleasuring myself. I have depended on it for so long.

The blonde is now pushing her tongue in between my pink folds, seeking out my wetness. Her tongue that so expertly pleasured my mouth and nipples is now pleasuring my pussy. She licks and sucks on my clit. I can feel an orgasm nearing its final push through me, like a huge electric shock. I lift my legs higher, and push into her, allowing her deeper entrance to my inner core. Her tongue moves in, and as she is beginning to moan with her own pleasure, I can feel the rush of that orgasm go through me. My legs want to remain open, but at the same time I want to clamp down, and hold her in place, not allowing her to leave me. The orgasm continues to plummet through me in wave, as I climax over and over again. Her tongue continues to pleasure me, but she has backed off, now enjoying the rush of the orgasm that has spilled out of me.

"Ohhhh god, that was so fucking good," I tell her.

I shake off the fantasy and now as I open my eyes, I see Sara sitting on the edge of the bed, watching me. I can feel the heat rise in my face.

"Sara! How long have you been there?" I ask her.

"Long enough to enjoy watching you pleasure yourself. Must have been a good fantasy?" she asks me.

"Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you. I was hot from the video." I said, but wish I could tell her it was her that made me so hot.

"And which person in that film made you so hot? The gorgeous stud in the office one, or the construction worker?" she asked.

"Actually neither. It was the blonde girl who went down on the redhead with such excitement. I keep thinking about how I never had that. I guess I got caught up in all of it," I shared with Sara.

Sara moved into bed with me, and laid next to me. "I am really sorry you never shared this with me before. What a dick he was."

"Sara it’s not that easy telling someone your husband is a dick in bed."

"I guess not, but I wish I knew all the same." She said. "I don’t understand it though. I think you are hot, and I wouldn’t treat you like that."

"You do?" You think I am hot?" I asked.

"Of course I do, and would have acted on it, but I always thought you were a one man lady." She chuckled.

This was so new to me. Sara thinking of me like this. I was becoming aroused. I looked into Sara’s eyes and asked her to stay with me.

"I’m not asking for anything, but company. I am tired of sleeping alone." And then I could feel the tears build.

Sara moved closer and began wiping the tears away, consoling me. She then licked a tear from my face and our eyes met.

"Let me show you how much I love you my friend." She said.

Sara began kissing me, and it was the first time I had ever kissed a woman in a sexual way. I was surprised at the easiness of the act. Sara’s lips were so soft, so inviting, and she seemed to linger at my lips. She didn’t race to the second step. She took her time, enjoying each kiss, and seemed to make sure I was enjoying them as well. I stroked my nipples while she kissed me, and wanted to feel her mouth on them. She recognized the need, and was soon sucking on them. Her tongue was so wet and warm on them. Her movements were skillful, and I enjoyed each touch, savoring them. Her fingers moved into my slit that had been drenched from my own self pleasuring.

"You did have fun here huh?" she asked with a smile.

I closed my eyes, and pushed the blonde out of my head who tried to get back in, and now imagined only Sara making love to me. Her fingers probed and stroked me. I opened my legs as an invitation, and it was accepted. Sara moved to me, and her mouth found my wetness eagerly. This was so good, making love to someone who really wanted me, who was here because they wanted to be, not because it was on a checklist of things to do during sex. I felt a heat building in my pussy, not like anything I had felt before. I reached for my legs and pulled them back. Sara assisted by holding my thighs back. Her mouth moved over me, and her tongue in and out of me. Her lips pulled at my clit, sending small surges of pleasure through me. I knew I was going to climax again and soon. I tried to hold off, but as Sara licked the full length of my slit and ended at my clit, I bucked and unleashed a powerful orgasm, unlike anything I had ever felt before. I felt like I was on fire, and Sara allowed me to enjoy the rush of pleasure.

"Oh Sara that was so erotic. I came so hard. I never felt like that before." I told her.

Sara released my legs, and allowed me to put them down. She laid her head on my one thigh, as she stroked the other one with her fingertips. I was so relaxed and felt so warm. I finally knew what it was like to have someone really enjoy my pussy, savoring it. Sara stroked my clit again, and I focused on how she was pleasuring me. I knew I wanted to return the physical love she was sharing with me.

"Can I love you back?" I asked.

"No, I want you to relax and enjoy me pleasuring you. Tonight will be about that. I want you to know what it is like to be desired, to be really wanted, needed.’ She returned to licking my pussy in gentle lapping movements. I closed my eyes, and I did for a second time, feel her need to be with me. I knew she wanted to pleasure me, because she wanted to, not because she felt she had to.

She may have felt some pity for me that night, but she never let on she did. She introduced me to the world of true desire. I finally knew what it is what like to be really wanted. Sara and I would again sleep together, but Liz would join us, and the three of us would become frequent lovers. I would eventually find a man who would love me like Sara did that night, and his need for me never faded.