The alarm rudely yanked me into consciousness and excerpts of the night came flooding back. Michael and I ruthlessly fighting, restless sleep, dreams of intensely electrifying sex, and... Dustin? Was that a dream too? Without thinking my tongue ran across my full lips. Had I really tasted him? The recollection of his bittersweet cum caused the blood in my veins to pound. An onslaught of tangled emotions coursed through me: disbelief, fear, anger, embarrassment. I felt like I'd been kicked in the gut; the bitter taste of bile rose in the back of my throat and I gagged; rushing to the bathroom, I wretched up the acidic contents of my empty stomach. It burned my throat and left an acrid taste in my mouth. I flushed the toilet and used trembling hands to turn on the shower. Stepping under the cool water I breathed deeply trying to reign in my chaotic emotions. I didn't have time for an emotional crisis; I had to work in an hour.
The clock read 6:23am when I emerged from the bathroom. Damn it! I was already running behind. Hastily, I pulled on a plain white thong and matching bra. I towel dried my blonde tresses and ran a brush through them before pulling the strands up into a wet, but neatly pinned bun. A white, long sleeve, cotton tee was paired with a pair of deep maroon scrubs. The outfit was completed with white socks and shoes. I brushed my teeth and met my reflection in the mirror. My green eyes looked shaken until I angrily scowled at myself. A quick application of mascara and lip-gloss and then I was out the door. As I climbed into my car I could still taste the foul pungency of my vomit over the minty taste of Crest. Not the best way to start the day. The clock read 6:36am.
Thankfully the first 8hrs of my shift were insanely busy. Several new admits to the unit and one discharge left me with no time to think about anything but work. At 3:15pm I headed down to the cafeteria for coffee and something other than vending machine fare. I grabbed a fairly decent looking salad topped with ripe tomatoes, bacon crumbles, croutons and blue cheese. That combined with piping hot coffee and the ability to sit down for a minute lead to a moment of relaxation, which lead my mind ponder questions about my night. What had Dustin been doing at my house? How long had he been there? How did he get in? Why did he leave without talking to me? What was going on!? Why, how, what? I had no answers, only questions. To my surprise as I thought about the night's events a slow desire uncurled deep within me. Part of me wanted to finish what we had started. I guiltily stared into my coffee cup. That was horrible of me to feel; it was incredibly unfair to Michael. Thinking about him brought back our argument.
"Liz...hello, earth to Liz!"
I was snapped from my reverie and looked up to find the offending voice. It was Janet, a peppy nurse from pediatrics. Her honest, blue eyes twinkled down at me from within a halo of cropped brunette hair. She was one of those adorable girls that you knew had been a cheerleader in high school. I had worked with her for nearly two years before transferring to the NICU. "Hey Janet, sorry, I didn't see you."
"I could tell! You looked like you were thinking of something other than work too!" She sat down next to me, her cafeteria tray full of pizza, yogurt and a carton of orange juice.
I laughed at her, "I'll never understand how you can eat that array of tastes in one sitting -- let alone all those carbs without gaining weight!"
She rolled her eyes at me, "Nice dodge. So how have you been?"
"Oh you know," I smiled as I said it and we both laughed. Responding with "You know" had always been our code word for great sex the night before; although, I wondered why I had answered that way in light of my night.
"Still seeing Michael?" Her blue eyes looked disapproving as she asked. I didn't understand her dislike for him.
"Of course," I said; "you're still with Greg?"
She beamed, "Engaged!" She pulled her necklace out from under her scrubs to show me the ring. We avoided gemmed rings in Pediatrics and the NICU due to scrubbing down all the time and the extra risk for bacteria.
"Oh my gosh!! Congrats!! When!? How come you didn't tell me!?"
She frowned, "I was going to. I haven't told anyone yet -- it was just this weekend. Our engagement party is Saturday -- say you'll come."
I nodded and hugged her. We spent several minutes catching up and eating our lunches. I glanced at the cafeteria clock; it read 3:42pm. "I have to get back to the floor, text me all the details and good for you girl! I'm so happy to hear the news."
I entered the stairwell and bounded up the stairs taking them two at a time. Since I was only 5'5" it was a bit of a stretch, but it felt good on my muscles and got the blood pumping through my veins again after sitting. The NICU was on the 3rd floor, just down the hall from Pediatrics. Along with Janet, I had also met Dustin when I worked in Pediatrics. Dr. Dustin Alexander. At 36yrs old, he was one of the most promising young doctors we had on staff. I tried to push him from my thoughts; he'd always been such a good friend so I didn't understand anything about last night. Reaching the 3rd floor door I pulled the handle to open it just as someone pushed it from the other side. The door connected with my cheek bone in a resounding thud. I winced and inhaled sharply.
"I'm so sorry, are you..." the familiar voice trailed off when our eyes connected. Dustin's golden brown eyes seemed to invade my soul. "Are you okay Liz?" His warm hand brushed my hands away so he could look at my cheek. His touch was soft and made me think about where his hands had been last night. I pulled back positive that my face was flushed with emotion.
"I'm fine, it was just an accident, no worries -- I'm running late though." I brushed past him, looking back momentarily wanting to say something, but unable to find the words. I ended up waving slightly in a wordless goodbye.
"Ice it or you'll bruise even more." His voice trailed after me.
The clock in my living room read 8:22pm when I walked through the door. Peeling off clothes as I headed to the bathroom I drew up a warm shower and climbed in. It had been an eternally long day. The last three hours of my shift had been busy. Most days were busy, that was why I loved my job -- no matter what I was busy learning and helping... healing even. The warm water cascaded down my face, over my shoulders, across my slender hips and then puddled slightly around my toes before spiraling down the drain. I let my tension flow away with the water. As I soaped up my body with vanilla shower gel I felt almost normal again. Then I washed my face and the pain from the bruise made everything feel surreal again. Still, I would have stayed all night in the shower except the steam had filled my small bathroom so much that I felt almost suffocated by it; so much for a decent bathroom fan. Reluctantly I turned off the water and toweled down. Still partially wet I pulled on my favorite bamboo robe. It was navy blue, and made out of thin material so it hugged every curve I had; clinging to my breasts and outlining my full nipples. I left my hair a tousled mess and headed to the kitchen.
The clock read 9:06pm. I glanced at my cell phone -- three missed calls and a text from Janet about her engagement party. The missed calls were all from Michael. I dialed his number.
"Hey..."he said an apology in his voice.
