Chapter: 1
In the summer of '96 I was on a mission to seduce my friend's girlfriend. I know, I'm an asshole, but wait until you've heard the whole story. It's not as bad as it sounds. It's all about context. Okay, so my name is Liam, and at the time I was nineteen years old. Just a year out of High School. I really shouldn't have been trying to seduce anyone. I had negative game. I was shy and easily embarrassed, not much of a talker and my experience with girls consisted of a yearlong relationship with a freshmen girl during my senior year. We had done some heavy petting and some fully clothed grinding in that time so you could say I was a bit of a late bloomer, and a slow mover. It's not like I had looks going for me either. I mean don't get me wrong, I'm not ugly, just average, I guess. Of everyone in my family, I got all the Scottish genes. I'm 5'6" and 120lbs skinny, with red hair, blue eyes, and pale skin that burns in the time it takes to dash out to the curb to check the mail and get back inside. I look a lot like Seth Green.
The one thing I had going for me was my rock band. Every small town has one, and I was the bass player. The friend in this tale was the lead singer, Alfred. We mostly just called him ALF. If you're not familiar with rock band hierarchies, it goes like this; lead singers are at the top. They get the first pick of all the girls. They have the mic, everyone's looking at them most of the time because they're delivering the message of the songs. Next are the guitar players. Not much to say there. Guitars are just cool, and they get to solo which brings the focus to them for a decent portion of every song. Then comes the drummer. There's always a bad boy mystique that precedes them and they're physical, just banging away on stuff all the time. At the bottom is the bass player. He gets last pick, last attention if any at all. The butt of all jokes. This brings us back to ALF at the top of the band hierarchy, and he had Jade.
Jade had the most amazing green eyes I'd ever seen. Cheerleading and swim team had given her a subtle hourglass figure, hips, waist, and the perkiest set of B-cups you could ask for. This girl was a sexy young teen and she knew it. She was playful and flirty with everyone and it came off as a genuine part of her personality without seeming inappropriate. ALF, on the other hand, was a dark intellectual, born into a half Catholic, half Jewish family (that makes him Jew-ish, the joke never got old), he abhorred all religion and saw it as a crutch for the week minded. He had little patience for people he deemed idiotic. His high IQ comparatively put most people in that category anyway, and you usually only got one chance to prove yourself. Things had gotten a little weird in the short time since Alfred and Jade had graduated. We were starting to get the feeling that Jade was slipping into that category in ALF's mind. A hot body only goes so far, I guess. Looking back, it should have occurred to us that the ex-cheerleader and the future physics professor had nothing but swimming in common. They had always fought about everything, just to turn right back around, make up, and then fight again.
That summer I was six months post break-up with my (one and only) long term girlfriend and was feeling a bit jealous of Alfred's relationship. One night, my roommate/guitarist Lee and I were hanging out at Jade's house with her and ALF. The heat of the day lay over the town like a heavy blanket even after the sun went down. We had opened all the doors and windows trying to get some air flow. The four of us were just hanging out watching movies and enjoying one of those weekend summer nights of youth you hear about in all the songs. Jade was trying to keep the mood light in her usual way, but ALF was a brooding presence in the room. Lee was stretched out on the floor where he could get his 6'3" frame comfortable for watching the movie. By "frame" I mean door frame. He was a solid ogre of a man that took up a whole doorway. I had taken the love seat for my small ass, leaving room for the couple on the couch to my left, directly in front of the television.
Jade, not all that concerned with PDA, was trying to get ALF to make out with her but couldn't draw his attention from the movie. They were laid out on the couch with him behind her, one arm over her and the other supporting his head on the arm of the couch. It started with her tilting her head back to place little pecks on his neck. When that didn't work, she tried moving his hand to her breast and leaving it there to see what he would do. After a second ALF moved it right back to just hanging over her side, lightly touching her stomach. I was taking this all in, trying to be subtle while splitting my attention between the screen and the lithe goddess weaving her erotic spell just a couple feet from me. To be honest I had a little crush on her. Nothing serious, I mean she was dating my friend, but there's no harm in looking or joining in on a little mutual flirting from time to time, right? As ALF moved his hand away, I could clearly see by the light of the television that her nipples were erect. Jade arched her back and slid an arm behind her to undue Alfred's top button to get a hold of his pierced pole. (Yes, we all knew about the cock piercing he got. On stage he liked to turn his back to the crowd, whip it out and click the bar on his mic, a sight our drummer never wanted.) She started moving her hand in a back and forth motion when he finally reacted.
"What the Fuck, Jade!"
Alfred's outburst broke into the room drowning out the action scene on the television. He pushed Jade on to the floor, barely missing Lee, as he buttoned up his shorts. She immediately started crying as we all looked at her.
"You're always doing this shit!" he continued berating her, getting up from the couch and shoving a finger accusingly in her face. "I can never just enjoy myself because you're all over me! Can't you just for one, mother, fucking, minute chill the fuck out? God damn it! I'm happy to fuck your brains out when we're alone but I've told you a hundred times, 'when we're around people, keep your hands to yourself'"
Jade's lip was quivering as she meekly responded, "I'm sorry Alfie, I, I just love you and love touching you and feeling your touch. I thought since we're in a dark room around good friends and the movie is loud and everything...we could just..." she trailed off, her eyes dropping to the floor.
ALF was unphased. "You thought." he huffed to himself. "You're incapable of rational thought; you dumb slut." He turned on her again. If you had been handed even half the brains you got in looks, this might have worked. I can't do this anymore. I'm done. We're done." Without waiting for a response, he stormed out the open front door, the screen slamming shut behind him.
Jade was left shaken and sobbing on the floor while Lee and I were left awkwardly witnessing the destruction ALF had left. Alfred's abhorrence of PDA of any kind was well-known, but this had to have been building for some time.
Lee was the first to try to break the ice. "Shit Jade, I'm sorry he can be such a dick sometimes. I'm sure he'll be back once he cools off."
"No" she replied, wiping tears away from her cheeks. "In all our fights, he has never said we were done. You know him. When he makes up his mind on something, there is no turning back."
Trying to figure out the best thing to do for the situation I spoke up. "Jade, we can leave if you want to be alone. God, I'm so sorry he treats you like this."
She half laughed and sniffed her running nose. "Thanks, but no, I'd rather be with friends right now." Then she realized the awkwardness of the situation. "Oh god guys, you've all been friends and band mates longer than I've known him and I'm just the stupid girlfriend that's been hanging around for the last year. I don't want to cause any drama in the band, maybe you should follow him, so he doesn't think you're taking my side or anything."
I couldn't help but let out a little uncomfortable laugh. "Wow, he's really beaten you down, verbally hasn't he? Don't worry about us. Guys are different. Even if he gets mad at us for staying, we'll fight and get over it and end up busting his balls about something. Everything will go back to normal. If you want friends around, we're staying." I looked to Lee for support, and he shot back a look that I'd seen a hundred times that communicated, 'this is why you spent all of high school friend zoned'.
He quickly covered for me, however. "Yeah, I guess we can stay for a while if that's what you want."
The old Jade seemed to break through the pain of what had just happened. "Thank you, guys, so much for staying. You're such good friends. We're not going to let that dick ruin our night."
With that she started getting the next movie ready. I hadn't even noticed when the other one had stopped. What I did notice were those legs, going all the way up into the short shorts painted on her ass. The butterfly tramp stamp on her lower back. (Was it even clichΓ© yet back then?) I also noticed the one strap of her tank top that had fallen off one shoulder, giving me a better view of her black bra. It didn't take me long to take it all in, but long enough that when I snapped out of it and looked over at Lee, he was giving me a disappointed look. I just shrugged and turned to sit down. We all got settled back into our places with Lee a couple feet in front of the main couch laying perpendicular to it. Jade took her spot on one far cushion and I took the other side, figuring it would be a better view than the love seat off to the right where I had been sitting. Admittedly this also put me on the same couch as Jade. As the movie started, I saw Jade rubbing at her shoulder and neck.
"Are you okay?" I whispered.
"Yeah, just a little sore from being thrown to the floor, I'll be fine." She replied.
Part way through the movie, Lee fell asleep and Jade got more comfortable by taking up more of the couch and stretching out. She put her feet in my lap and looked at me to see if I minded. I tried to send back the coolest of all nonchalant smiles as if to say, 'yeah babe, It's no big deal'. What I felt was 'oh my god her feet are in your lap, don't get hard!' After what seemed like ages to my nineteen-year-old virgin mind, I got up the courage to put my hands on her feet and start rubbing. The response I got gave me an instant erection. There was a deep thrumming in her throat that sounded like she was purring. Those young thick nipples were making their presence known again but this time I was responsible. We returned to watching the movie as I took my time on each foot. Now that I had the affirmative response I was looking for, I started on my routine. (Being in the friend zone with every girl you've been interested in for all of Jr. High and Sr. High gives you a lot of practice.) I looked over to see if she was enjoying my technique. Her head was slightly back, and her eyes were kind of fluttering and half closed, her breathing had slowed and was a little heavier. I quietly chuckled to myself, giving myself a mental pat on the back. She lowered her head back down at me and we locked eyes.