I had been struggling with feeling sexually frustrated for months. I was married for three years at the time. I had developed a fondness for handjobs. This developed for a variety of reasons. Probably the most important is that I reasoned that this was a safe way to have sexual release with someone other than my wife.
I had made the decision to go out with a couple of co-workers for lunch, both female. One was single, the other was preparing to separate from her husband of 11 years. Both were enjoying an active and free sex life, the likes of which I had left behind (or may have never known).
I always said they could trust me to give an unbiased opinion, and my candid thoughts, regarding their sexual escapades. In other words, a safe male perspective. They always enjoyed this and knew they were teasing me. I would make jokes about being aroused and do things like putting my cold drink near my crotch saying I needed to tend to my problem before I could stand up. They always laughed.
One time in particular I drove one of them back to the office. She was beautiful. She was only about 5 feet tall. She had long brunette hair and was very petite. She was clearly the more voracious of the two. She openly, always said that she was just into "Having fun."
I really wanted her. I was rock hard the entire drive back to the office. I complained to her that I didn't know how I was going to focus for the remainder of the day, being so aroused. She slyly said, "Well, don't you have any porn at home?" I replied, "Yes". She said, "Well, put it on tonight when you get home and ..." She trailed off and smiled again. Her meaning was clear.
Despite the overwhelming urge to ask her to give me hand relief, I did not. I didn't necessarily regret it. I was too scared. Let's just say it was a long day after that.
A couple of months passed and the lunches kind of stopped. We had several of them. It was just because we all got busy and couldn't work it out. However, I did see her late some evenings.
We usually made small talk, and a couple of jokes about work, but none of the sexually arousing stuff that came up during lunch. Some of the small talk we had revealed that she was really hurting for money. She had a 10 year old son, was a single mom, and had recently moved to a more costly apartment. On a few occasions, I offered to buy her a coffee as a small gesture.
I missed the lunches and had not been able to forget about the teasing she had put me through. Every time I saw her I thought about how I could finagle some kind of meaningless, lust-driven, liaison with her. One night, I got my nerve up. She walked by my office to clock out, and I called her in. She began, "Hi, what's up?"
"Listen, I know you've got to get home so I'll be brief."
"OK."
"I miss the lunches we used to have. I really enjoyed them." (smiling).
She smiled too and replied "Me too, we'll have to do it again soon," and started to walk off.
"Wait!"
She stopped and turned back. "What? Are you O.K.?"
"Listen, I'm really nervous about this. If I asked you a question could you promise that it would not come between us, or effect us here, at the office?"
"What are you talking about?"
"I want to ask you something, but do not want to offend you. You know I think you're great. You're professional, independent, strong, and ..."
"Get to the point."
"Would you be interested in earning a little more money?"
"How?" Her face looked slightly concerned.
I suddenly became very shy and shaky, but forced myself to continue.
"I would like to know if you'd be interested in giving me a handjob, for money, it could be our secret."
She paused and I was terrified.
"You know I'm in a relationship, and you're married!"
"I know. It would be something extra. You would make more in 10 to 15 minutes than you do in one hour of work here."
Again, she paused.
"You mean here?"
"Yeah, nobody else is here when it's late. We could go into your office. I think we'll be less likely to disturbed there."
