This is another story based on my travels. I wrote it mostly for myself, so I can remember all the details of the encounter and the person more vividly, but thought I'd share it. So while one part may be a bit off-putting, remember, it's a true story! We worked around the issue, and it was fabulous. [Chapter 2, however, devolves into fantasy... Stay tuned!] Thanks for your feedback!
--Solana-
~~~
Solana couldn't believe where she was: Nicaragua!!! It was exciting, to say the least: sheltered Americans like her didn't go to shady corners of the globe like Nicaragua, what with Iran-Contra, unexploded land-mines and the like.
A fiery 30-something, Solana was a petite, long-haired brunette with the body of a yogi and the disposition of a flirtatious cynic. But her social life had taken a turn for the worse when she went back to grad school at just the same time as all of her friends had paired off and settled down.
To make up for all the boring weekends of the school year, she decided to head off someplace exotic, and Nicaragua just seemed to fit the bill.
"Be caaareful!" Solana's best buddy had warned. "Don't get kidnapped! Have fun fucking the Sandanistas! Bring me back some
cocaiiiiina
!"
Despite Nicaragua's sordid history, however, the political climate had calmed down, and Nicaragua was picking up as a place for tourists to head to in search of a cheap vacation in the sun. Sadly, Solana hadn't met any hot locals, nor yet sampled the famous crop, but with the great exchange rate and the perfect tropical weather, things were decidedly just fine.
In fact, it was beyond easy: She'd spent the first night on a gorgeous lakeshore less than an hour from the airport in Managua, and the next morning hopped into a
collectivo
taxi with 2 other American chicks, and, for less than $3, arrived 45 minutes later in a tiny, backwater but up-and-coming beach town on the Nicaraguan Pacific Coast.
And, then, on her very first night in town, Solana and her new friends hit the jackpot: at dinner, they were seated next to a trio of friendly Argentinean guys, who were traveling together up the coast of Central America.
All nice-looking boys, though nothing out of the ordinary, the group had a clear pecking order. The Alpha Dog was a charming and fashionable (if short) guy sporting soccer shorts, a soul patch, demonstrative arm-movements and a "Look at me!" countenance to match. The Bear, the shy one, had a hefty build, kind dark eyes, and a reticent, observant expression. The one Solana dubbed the Maestro (for his strong interest in being sure the Gringas got their Spanish correct) had a soft face, a clean-shaven head, the basic traveler's kit of shorts-and-t-shirt, plus trendy black, square-framed glasses shielding bright blue eyes.
Although at dinner he was obscured by the light, Solana was pretty sure the Maestro was just her type: she couldn't resist a fair-skinned Latin man, and, at home in the U.S., the smart ones were always the ones who charmed her.
But Solana was on vacation, and it'd been a long time: if she couldn't have first choice, any of these fine, foreign men would do.
As the night wore on, she was drawn more and more to the Maestro. Although more soft-spoken than the Alpha Dog, he had interesting things to say, and was charming in his subdued, intelligent way. Most importantly, he made an effort to tone down the harsh Argentinian accent Solana had so much trouble understanding, and gave her mini, on-the-spot lessons in Spanish.
Soon after the meal, Solana's female companions decided to head home. But Solana had just begun to party! Luckily, the boys wanted her to stay, too. She was right where she preferred to be: smack in the center of a trio of guys. She knew her Spanish skillz -- and cross-cultural negotiating -- weren't quite good enough to arrange a threesome (or a foursome!), but she hoped she could swing getting a taste of at least one of these guys.
They moved to a table closer to the music and the dancing tourists. The posse was all cracking up from the Spanish lessons going on between Solana and the Maestro
: "Mi gato está muerto debajo de la mesa con un paraguas amarillo en la mano."
My cat is dead underneath the table with a yellow umbrella in its hand.
Soon, they'd moved on to more personal lessons: how to say the most important phrases in American English and Argentinian Spanish.
¡Quiero cojerte!
"I want to fuck you."
¡Chupame la pija!
"Lick my dick." And the like.
Solana sat back, and, peering at each of the boys, began,
"
Here is a phrase you must know, boys.
Aqui es una phrase muy, muy importante. Escuchan, chicos..."
She looked from one to one, lingering on each of the Argentinian's gaze for a quick moment. "Who wants..." she said, annunciating clearly, "... to... eat... my.... pussy?"
The Bear smirked, chuckled, and glanced nervously from his beer to the Yanqui loca to his friends and back. The Alpha Dog -- whose English was not that great -- looked confused but smiled charmingly nonetheless. And the Maestro, well, the Maestro knew how to answer. Fueled by several
cervezas
, he lifted his hands over his head, and, laughing, cried, "Pick me!" in accented English. "Pick me, pick me! Me!"
Solana smiled a big smile, raised her eyebrows, and, giving him a knowing look, raised her
cerveza
in his direction.
~~~
A few hours later, Solana sat on the beach, alone with the Maestro, unsure of where the night was going to lead.
Despite all of their verbal flirting, he'd stayed physically pretty far away from her all night. She'd tried leaning in, touching his knees and shoulders, putting up and taking down her hair, talking about sex, but none of her tricks seemed to be getting him to respond. Clearly he was interested enough to let his friends go back to the hostel without him so he could hang out and chat with her alone for a few hours, but as for something physical, well, Solana just couldn't tell.
Maybe he was simply shy. But then again, the thought, maybe he was actually being polite: it looked like he had a cold sore! Still, she figured they could work around that, as much as a bummer that would be to have to work around. He had such nice, plump, full lips, and, from his animated response to her earlier
¿Quien quiere lamarme la raba?"
question, he seemed like such an eager beaver-eater, too. And she had a feeling he'd be top-notch, at that: the enthusiasts always are! But, who knew -- maybe he wasn't even interested.
They continued the conversation and
lecciónes de Español
for a little while longer, listening to the surf and the wind. They talked about psychology and philosophy and thinking in colors, about remembering with pictures instead of words, about traveling and living abroad. They joked about how fooling around in English was called "running the bases," and she explained the First Base to Home Plate "F" mnemonic (French! Feel! Finger! Fuck!) He loved it.
Solana was having a great time. But, it was getting late, and she was unsure of the next step.
"Well," she said finally, after another moment of sipping from their
cervezas
and listening to the night breeze, "I've really enjoyed talking to you. It's been a really fun few days." She touched his knee again, trying to send some sort of signal.
"Yes," he agreed, without moving. Then, he added, shyly:
"Lo que falta es un beso."
All that's missing is a kiss.
She swooned -- how much better everything sounds in Spanish! And he did like her! Rock on!
She leaned in again, and agreed, in English. "For sure." But before she knew what she was saying, more words just tumbled out, in her brash New York way: "It's just too bad about that herpes you've got there..." She nodded in his direction.
He seemed embarrassed, but clearly aware. Had he been being polite all this time, as opposed to shy? Was he a good one after all?
"Yes, well..." he cleared his throat, blushing slightly. "It's just from the sun, you know," he started, speaking quickly, and picking up speed with every word, his English becoming more and more confused. "It'll be gone in two days... When I've been on vacation before, lots of times, the women, they don't mind. I don't know why. I mean, it's not a herpes, why people, not care, go away, not..."
She looked straight at him, raising an eyebrow. "Uh-huh?"
The Maestro hung his head. "I am a terrible liar," he admitted, dejected.
Solana laughed. Although Solana thought the "all the other women" comment was certainly approaching a colossal fail on his part, in the end she didn't believe him anyway, and found the sad attempt to get some
besos
endearing and, in fact, kind of adorable.
OK, quite adorable.
On top of that, their few hits of weed had her feeling especially affectionate, and the
cervezas
had lowered her inhibitions just enough.