Lacy Blues

One summer night some years ago in northern Georgia, I was dropping a girl off at her place after a few drinks. She lived with her grandparents, a well-to-do couple that owned a few acres out in Woodstock. They never were too fond of me; they were polite enough, but always gave their niceties from wrinkled scowls. This might have had something to do with my being part Hispanic and their being part... well, racist.

The girl- who shall go unnamed- was a scrawny thing. Her face was angular and drawn, with tired eyes that never seemed fully present. Her limbs were slim- frail, even. Only the subtle curves of her hips and breasts belied her femininity... not much of an ass on that one. She was very pale, and had frizzy, red hair that went all the way down her back. I enjoyed looking at her. Her wispy form demanded close inspection, but she was cold to my affections- stiff against embraces, and casually aloof.

We parked under the boughs of a sleepy oak and sat looking out across the gently sloping hills. It was a foggy night, and moonlight fell scattered in the clearing, illuminating the distant treeline in skeletal hues. We talked. Well, mostly I talked; she listened, quietly watching me from the passenger seat. It was pleasing to know her eyes were upon me, scanning me. I wondered what sort of thoughts moved behind those distant eyes.

I don't remember much of what was said. I know that I joked with her, refusing her passive withdrawal with my own silliness. In spite of herself she even smiled once or twice. We must have sat there for maybe 10 minutes, just talking and watching the low clouds billow underneath the moon. Then at some point in the conversation, somehow panties were brought up, and she turns to me and says, "I just got these pretty new panties, see?"

As soon as she says this, she arches her back a little and pulls down the front of her jeans, revealing a set of bright blue, lacy panties clinging tightly to a small mound beneath. I was stunned, but only briefly. Not knowing what sort of game this might be, or how to logically interpret her gesture, I just let my instincts take over. I reached forward reflexively and slid my hand down her flat stomach, plunging it underneath those lacy blues into the hidden warmth.

She gasped quietly as my fingers found her clit, and turned to me with wide eyes, saying "Hey! You're not supposed to touch me there! Only I'm allowed to-" I cut her off with a deep kiss, still swirling my now moistening fingers underneath the fabric. Her words gave way to soft moans, that vibrated through my lips and curled them into a smile. Her hands stayed at her side.

I pulled back and looked her directly in the eyes, stopping the motion from my hand, but not removing it. It was a wordless message. Stop me, it said. But she looked back for a moment and said, "you're good." Now I fell upon her in earnest, gathering up her frizzy, red hair into a fist just behind her skull and pulling her head to mine. She yielded kisses to me reluctantly, but her hips had already begun to chase my hand as I pulled it away.

With unspoken coordination we both started moving for the back seat. Perhaps coordination is not the right term. I'm 6'2 and scrawny, so with the both of us trying to get back there so quickly, it was like a pair of spider monkeys wrestling down a hill. Somehow we did make it eventually, tearing each others clothes off as we went. I paused to look at her mostly naked body under the moonlight. Pale and exposed, she lay on her back wearing nothing but those lacy blues.

I ran my hands over her skin, marveling at the feminine softness, but she had other plans. She reached down, pulling those panties to the side and exposing a small slit and trimmed mound of hair. "I'm on the pill," she said. I moved to her as best I could in the limited space and she took hold of my cock with thin, soft hands and guided me inside.

There's always that first moment upon entering, no matter which girl it is, where the male brain flips a switch. It's like a moment of revelation- ah, this is where I'm supposed to be... this is purpose! I pushed in deep, to the hilt in fact. She moaned up at me and I smiled, thinking- that's more like it. I could feel my heart hammering as I started to fuck her- my body threatened to betray me at any moment. This was a new girl, and new girls are very exciting. "Don't you dare!" I thought to myself.

I turned my focus to outside the window, to the moonlit clearing. That helped. Trees had always made me feel calmer inside- never known why- and they helped me get a grip on my own pleasure that night. I drove into her again and again, wrenching that tiny voice of hers out through moans and squeaks, but my legs were starting to kill me in that cramped position. I stopped moving. "We've got to switch," I told her.

Eventually we reconfigured so that I was sitting upright in the seat, and she was straddling me. She carefully sank down, impaling herself upon me and we both paused with a sharp intake of air; then she started bouncing. Christ almighty, it was good! Way too good. I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing, forcing it to be slow and steady. That helped slow my heart. I did my best to turn my focus away from the wet little muscles wringing my cock as they slid up and down on it. "Fuck!" I blurted out. She moaned in response, seemingly pleased with my exclamation. I grabbed her bony hips tightly, a deeply instinctual urge- my every breath felt thick and almost sweet. For the life of me I can't remember what she was doing with her hands.

Then a sudden realization dawned on me. At once I felt partially disconnected from the mating. I looked at this girl, seeing her as one sees a stranger. She was beautiful and young... we both were. This was not just a summer night in Georgia, this was the summer of my youth, a fleeting moment in the span of my life that I would look back upon with longing and a smile once I had become stooped and gray.

I focused on that moment in time as hard as I could, trying to burn it into my memory. Her darkened silhouette moving against me, the smell of her frizzy hair and the way it fell across me, the smell of sex. All these sensations locked up together in a single memory, like an old box for storing various teas that you open years later and drink in the odor of so many different spices.

"Don't you dare cum yet!" Her voice sent the strange sense of time away in an instant. I nodded my head and said "uh huh," as best I could. Her movements changed, becoming more frantic. Her back hunched and she started moaning loudly and rhythmically. Then she fell forward and embraced me, grinding and moaning into me. Now she could not hide behind her aloof gaze or silence, now she was truly laid bare before me, and I took her in my arms and pressed my head against her. What pains in her life had made her this way? I wanted to breathe them in and take them away. But the moment passed.

She pulled back, breathing heavily. "Ok... now you can cum," she said. "How do you want it?" I smiled in the darkness and responded. "What you were doing was pretty nice."

"Oh this?" She said with a few quick bounces. "Ah! yeah, that," I answered, seeing the flash of her teeth as she smiled. So she picked up the pace again, and I was no longer obligated to hold back. I grabbed her hips and pumped up into her as she moved. It didn't take long. There was a gathering of tension across my entire being, a culmination of fire. I felt everything I was start to slip away as the orgasm took me. With thrust after thrust I poured my seed into her. The force of it pitched me forward, and I bit her hard. I was vaguely aware of her gasping in pain, but it didn't matter. Nothing mattered in that moment except that I impregnate her, and only in that moment could I feel such a thing. To put my seed in her, and make her mine, and watch the looks of horror on her grandparents' faces as they saw my tainted bloodline take hold in her womb... that I had seeded their little girl and she belonged to me now.

But as the orgasm faded, so too did the irrational instincts, and the full realizations of their implications returned to me. No, no, no, no! I did not want to get anyone pregnant! I returned me to myself. She rolled off of me and we talked. Well, mostly I talked; she listened, quietly watching me from nearby. Her aloofness had returned, no longer burned away by orgasmic bliss. Eventually we parted ways. I watched her walk back into her house with some sense of satisfaction that my seed was dripping out of her, but also great relief that she was on the pill. I would have followed her and lain with her through the night until we both fell asleep, but I knew that's not what she wanted.

For a moment I sat alone, cleaning a window of fog and watching the stillness of the clearing around me. How many lovers had these trees shadowed in their time? To what collection of coital frenzy had I just added myself? In time I cranked up the car and started for home.

I never saw her again.