Joel & Mrs. Jenkins 01
I might be the only person in Middleton who is happy that the recent storms blew through, but to me, it seemed to be the only way that I was going to get any rest. I mean, with the wide spread power outages and trees down all over the place, things kind of shut down, which was my savings grace to finally catch on my rest. I mean the heat and the sound of purring generators didn't help, but other than that, I finally had a chance to catch up on my rest without worrying about the book club members or women showing up at my work or anything like that.
And to increase my chances of getting some rest, my fiancé Nurse Chicklet, put our relationship on a break so she could, well, I don't why she put us on a break, but I was probably too tired to pay close attention whenever she thoroughly explained it to me in great detail. I mean, she still called me 50 times a day, but that was to unload steam. It seems that Head Nurse Ingram got pissed off when Nurse Chicklet stole me from her, so Head Nurse Ingram was punishing my fiancé Nurse Chicklet with a crazy shift on the 5th floor of the hospital. So, you know, I had to hear all about that all day long no matter how tired I was and no matter that the city was in the middle of a power outage emergency.
LOL, or she truly loves me and can't go 20 minutes without speaking with me.
"I'm fine, Nurse Chicklet. I'm kicking back on the front porch bench and I might doze off for a while. I mean, I know the answer already, but what's up and try to include why we're on a break."
"Joel, I told you. Head Nurse Ingram got all pissed off when I stole you from her and now, she's hell bent on punishing me with three weeks of duty on the 5th floor of the hospital. I mean, I have 20 charges to look after and it's a major mess every day because half of college football team is in here with bumps and bruises from a no pads walk through practice and I keep forgetting to zip up nursing dress and then they all just keep popping off. And I mean, it's pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, popping off everywhere and honey sometimes it gets in my mouth and I feel dirty and I don't want you to know me as dirty, even though I'm a bit of freak and I like weird sex stuff."
"But Nurse Chicklet, you're a trained professional nurse, so I can understand that things can happen between a patient and a nurse. So, come back to our relationship bed Nurse Chicklet and I promise to not think of as dirty, unless, you know, it's a Thursday night, which we both agreed would be dirty night."
"Hah, these guys have been treating me like a professional hooker with all the popping off going on around this place. But I didn't call you to argue Joel honey, I called to remind you that a break doesn't mean you don't have to protect our relationship bed and to ask a favor of you and remember, you're pussy whipped, so you have to give me this favor."
"Hey, it's me, Joel, honey. I would never cheat on you and our relationship bed is solid. And your apartment is the same way, right Nurse Chicklet?"
"Joel, I can't talk now. The lightning and thunder had me all flustered and I made a mistake and wore my club lingerie today, so my charges are getting discharging. Anyways, I need my favor and you know I pay back favors triple, right Joel?"
"What do you need and can I do it while I doze off on the front porch?"
"Good, I love you, Joel. Now listen, the only way I'm going to get out of this punishment shift is to be nice to Head Admin Jenkins, only Head Admin Jenkins stayed at home today with her power out, but she called in and asked around if we knew of anyone who had extra batteries for her 3-in-1 emergency lantern, flashlight and weather radio thingamabob, so I sent her your GPS and address."
"Ah, yeah, there are batteries in house, so, OK, but you're coming back to our relationship bed after she saves you from the punishment shift, right?"
"Joel, I told you I don't have time talk right now. So, here's the deal, you just need to be nice to her and give whatever size batteries she needs, but she's the type of trim and proper lady who wears those funky half glasses, so be nice and lift a pinky finger when you hand her the batteries and OMG, do not give the batteries from any of toys! She's not the type of lady who would know of such things. So, you got it? Stand straight, shoulders back and pinky finger up?"
"Got it, Nurse Chicklet, treat the stuffed business suit lady nice and lift a pinky finger."
"OK, and I promise that our relationship bed will be our martial bed soon. OK love of my life, bye now. Alright boys, who is on defense and who is on offense today? What Paul? No, I ended the call for sure. So, was it hut, hut, hut or nut, nut, nut? Oh, and I'm holding my hands under your crotch to receive your balls correctly, right Vino? I mean, spread like this and just a little wiggle? What? What do you mean I didn't hang up my phone properly?"
Ahh, that's right folks, that was my fiancé Nurse Chicklet. She is very loyal to our relationship bed, right? Which is my way of saying that I was still too exhausted to argue with her, which is my way of saying that I kicked back on the bench seat, listened to game and dozed off on the front porch.
"Ah, hello? Um, are you awake? Joel, right? HEY, um, Joel, right? Hi, I'm Head Admin Jenkins and the slut of the hospital texted me and informed me that you might be able to help me out with some batteries. Oh, and I meant slut in a good way. Everyone loves your precious Nurse Chicklet. She is very popular with the patients. And their parents. And their boyfriends. And their girlfriends. And the window washers. And the landscapers. So, you're sleepy head, Joel, right?"
"Yeah, I'm Joel, but please forgive for not raising my pinky finger when I speak back to you. It's been quite a summer for me and I have zero energy. Anyways, I'm sure we can find you some batteries. Come inside, Mrs. Jenkins."
Ah, trim and proper? Well, maybe while Mrs. Jenkins is trim and proper on the job at the hospital, but that looks like a standard sweat suit to me, which makes sense seeing how there is a city-wide power outage and dressing down is perfectly acceptable.
"Oh, is it proper for me to enter your relationship house with it being so dark inside and all? Don't you have a generator, Joel?"
"LOL, yes, I do, but it was still light out when I dozed off, so I'll turn it on soon. I've been tired lately to properly think everything through. So, it's proper for such a trim and proper woman to enter my relationship house, no matter how dark it may be."
"Well, as long as you approve and by the way, this is not how I usually dress. It's just that it's a crazy emergency situation, so don't think poorly of me, Joel."
Hell, it was a nice sweat logo suit, not to mention that it was probably pricey, so I gave her some props and escorted her inside.
"You look great Mrs. Jenkins, so stop worrying about that. That's actually a very nice and fancy logo sweat suit. So, C-Cell or D-Cell batteries?"
"Wow, I've never been inside of a relationship home before, let alone being alone with the man in said relationship and in the dark. Joel, is this one of those opportunities that sometimes causes people to get caught up in something? I mean, I might be trim and proper, but I'm not a prude, LOL, I think."
At least she recognized the meaning of a relationship home, right? I mean, it's sacred, right? However, she seemed to know a lot about the right questions to ask and the right statements to make, LOL, for being so trim and proper.
"So, here we are. Two adults, alone inside of the house and in the dark, not to mention that it didn't take very long for my monster milker D-Cell batteries to become smashed between us. And by the way, I guess I know where your D-Cell battery is and it feels like it's getting a charge. Ah, your turn, Joel."
