Insanity

I must be going insane. There is no other reasonable explanation. Every time I closed my eyes he was there. Standing in the recesses of my thoughts, waiting for me.

What could I do? I wanted him to be there, and I didn't want him to be there.

I no longer finished my assignments with precision. It would take hours to do what used to take just minutes.

I was forgetting to fix meals. Food was not what I was hungry for.

All I wanted to do was close my eyes and see him there. Wanting me.

I wanted to sit in the tub and close my eyes and masturbate to the images that he put inside my mind. To go to sleep at night with his phantom self entwined wit me in an erotic embrace. Just moments away from ecstasy.

I hear his voice as he tells me how he wants me. Where he wants me. And what he is wanting in return.

I hate the fact that nothing is getting done! All of my careful planning for this year is slowly trickling down the drain, because I cannot concentrate and I hate it!

But then again, I love it. The thrill that goes through me when I think of him, or when I hear his name is like ambrosia to me.

I close my eyes and there he is, like a looming presence of sexual heat, and even in my dreams, when he is not real, I am mesmerized by his even stare.

Slowly he walks toward me. I cannot take my eyes off his. He reaches out and moves my hair away from my face with one hand. Then lightly ran his fingertips down my cheek and neck, then resting his large gentle hand upon my shoulder.

When I move my eyes away from his to where his hand is resting on my shoulder, I notice that I am not wearing what I was before.

Gone are the blue jeans and t-shirt, only to be replaced by a large mans button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up.

The top few buttons are undone and his hand has pushed the shirt just slightly askew. Enough that my left nipple was peeking out from under the oversized shirt.

His hand moved forward and found the nape of my neck and pulled me toward him as he leaned down and kissed my deeply and passionately.

With my eyes closed and my lips occupied, he reached down with his other hand and ran it up the back of my thigh, over the swell of my buttocks and to the small of my back, lifting the shirt as he went.

My body was responding to the way he touched me with his hands and lips. My arms reached out for him and my hands began to explore his chest and his arms and his back.

Then before I knew what was happening, he lifted me up, like I was as light as air and carried me to the bed.

He laid me back and kissed my neck and shoulders as he gently unbuttoned my shirt. Working his way down, stopping only a few moments at my breasts to kiss and fondle them.

The touch of his tongue against my already erect nipples, sent tingles all through me. Making my back arch up to him and my hands grabbing him by his hair and pulling him to me, as I came very close to losing myself in the sensation.

I kept my eyes closed, afraid that if I opened them, he would disappear. His large hands moved down my sides as his kisses trailed toward my waiting pussy.

His hot breath on my nether lips sent an indescribable sensation through me. A sensation that I liked way too much.

He hesitated. I didn't know why. I was afraid to look, to open my eyes. The anticipation was killing me.

A barely audible moan of expectation escaped through my lips.

Then without warning his tongue was snaking between my lips and making me squirm.

He was doing things with his tongue that I didn't know was possible. I had never felt such pleasure.

My hips began to rock back and forth in the rhythm of his working tongue and I began to shiver with pleasure.

An orgasm like no other raced through my body so intensely that my toes curled! I began to chant and squirm as each wave passed through me.

Finally I was spent and still he licked and teased me.

I lifted my head and opened my eyes to look at him, and found myself alone and disoriented.

I was in my own bed and it was quite dark. The bedside clock said it was 3:00 a.m.

I was sweating like I had just run a mile or two, and the inside of my thighs were wet and sticky.

Still a little disoriented and a little embarrassed at the content of the dream, I headed for the bathroom for a quick shower.

As I removed my overly big button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, my mind drifted off to the memory of the dream where he had removed it for me.

I turned on the water and adjusted it to the right temperature and stepped under the spray of hot water.

As my head passed under the showerhead and I shut my eyes, I felt him, naked and in the shower behind me. Soaping the washcloth to scrub me clean.

Reaching around me to pull me back towards him. Feeling my breasts with soapy hands.

I opened my eyes and looked around. I was alone.

Tired and needing my rest, I showered quickly and headed for bed.

Saving the shower scene for when I had more energy, I drifted off to sleep with invisible arms holding me close to my fantasy.