I sat on the beach towel watching Lucy. She wore a loose, flimsy t-shirt, its neck stretched out, its hem grazing her upper thighs. She laughed behind her giant sunglasses, while playing with a dog from another party. Lucy waved a stick in her hand and threw it - the motion lifting the shirt just shy of her ample bottom, revealing her blue bikini.
Lucy was my girlfriend of about, god - 10 months now I guess. I had met her a few months into her separation from her husband. They married young, and as it turns out stupidly. While the split wasn't entirely hostile - it had taken its toll on her. I loved to see her smiling and happy.
It was wretchedly hot this July, and a group of us twenty-somethings headed out to a lake about an hour out of town. It wasn't too crowded, just enough to give the beach a festive feel. Our friends had brought enough food and drink to fuel us into the evening, and as soon as the sun dropped, the bonfires were lit. I sipped at my fourth beer, a distance from the fire as Lucy slowly approached.
She had a bad week, getting passed over from her promotion, and I could tell that it still clouded her head. At the same time, I had noticed that she hadn't taken the t-shirt off all day.
"Hey babe, not going to sit by the fire?" She asked, kneeling down on the beach towel.
"Nah, I hate smelling like smoke afterwards,"
"Is it okay if I smell like smoke?"
I smiled and her and pulled her in close for a kiss. "I like how you smell any which way," I gave her another quick peck before pulling a face, and smiling at her.
"Rance is driving back shortly, I thought maybe we'd catch a ride with him, is that cool with you?"
"Cool," I responded, looking down at her face. "We should pack up,"
* * * * * *
Taking the back seat in the minivan, Lucy and I were crammed in amongst coolers and blankets and other junk. She laid her left leg over mind, and cuddled under my arm. The van rocked as it rolled down the highway, lights zipping by monotonously. Some of our other friends in the car listened to music on their headphones, or fell asleep. Rance put on some old 'Blues Traveller', and I watched Lucy's face as she stared blankly out the window.
I pulled her further onto my lap and kissed her neck, before whispering into her ear.
"y'know what I'd love to do when we get home?"
She sunk into my body, eyes still elsewhere. "Chocolate cake?"
"Maybe after — but I was thinking of something else. Wanna hear?"
"Shoot," I nibbled at her neck and moved my arm across her belly.
"I would love to get home, and leave everything in the hallway, then take you into the bedroom," She momentarily tightened on my lap as the music in the background filled in the empty spaces. Her hand caressed my arm.
"I want to take you into that bedroom, and take your shirt off so I can see that full bikini I missed out on today," Lucy stayed silent. Every since the separation had begun, the stress had gotten to her in all manners, she ate and drank for comfort, started smoking again, kinda let things get out of control. Just before she met me, she had begun to get things back on track, working her way out of the bad habits, and getting herself back together. The more I learned about her experiences, the more I marvelled at her strength. Despite her work though, she was often shy and felt shameful about her body. Despite being wildly willing in bed, she would never have sex without the lights off. Seeing her today remain all covered up, well, I don't know for sure, but I felt like she was being self-conscious. I squeezed her tighter before continuing my story.