In an ethereal place, in my dreams, a fabric woven by my dedicated meditations and dreams, there is a very tall building with steep staircases, sandwiched among salty, grey structures on an unknown, un-trafficked street. The street is wide, two lanes with a median in the middle. Street lamps pepper the median and at night, the illumination of the grey salty buildings is like an ultra-high definition photograph of surreal deliberateness. Among the buildings is a staircase to a mall food court, with walkways lined by potted trees leading to bathroom stalls and tunnels into the unknown. There is also a staircase upward to a casino, with tiers of mezzanine levels allowing one to look down upon the gambling tables lit delicately by soft, yellow light from hanging lamps. But the building in this story starts with a staircase inside a cramped, narrow building whose walls are lined with pink shag carpeting.
The staircase is steep and narrow, and leads upwards to a floor seemingly higher than the first story of a building. There are two rooms. One, off to the right, is a waiting area lined with low couches. The couches are also covered in the soft, pink shag carpet. There is a dark corridor leading from the room containing a small, shallow staircase that leads upwards into an attic that is sparse of light and cluttered with racks of clothes. The second room, to the left from the top of the first, steep staircase, is a medium sized room.
The medium sized room is, like the others, lined with pink shag carpet, and is host to a fold-out table and a small couch. Most of the room is empty.
I am sitting naked, against the wall on one side of the room. My hands are cuffed behind me and I am sitting in seiza position on my knees. The thick, plush, pink shag carpeting helps with the discomfort of sitting on my knees. I have been locked there in place by celestial guardians of my one true desire. They have heard my prayers and meditations for years on end and decided to experiment with me.
In the middle of the room is Michelle, a short, pretty Chinese girl who I had met in college while playing poker with my neighbors. Michelle has light pallor for a Chinese girl and is very slight in frame except for her legs. For such a slight creature, her legs are awkwardly robust and her calves are, while not muscled and tight, exceptional robust.
In college, I became acquainted with her while hanging out with my poker associates. Somehow, we had exchanged AOL screen names and began chatting online. Michelle was studying to become a sonographer, and chances were high that she was away with the message "studying anatomy" posted on AIM. Occasionally we would engage though, and while I don't remember how, we ended up going out to together to eat Japanese food a few times.
I admit that, in college, my computer was accessible on the file sharing network and was always saturated with downloaded Asian porn. I had collected an extravagant collection of high-quality videos from both America and Japan. It was hard to say if Michelle new about this, but I had half a mind to believe she knew. I would also always attend the campus Asian Culture Society fashion shows, and took to constantly wearing the free ACS shirts around campus. The shirt was bright red and fit my frame well.
Well before meeting Michelle, I had cast off all factors that would inhibit my progress with girls. I stopped going to parties and hanging around people that based their interactions with people on smoking weed. It seemed like a waste of time and waste of money to me, given my true objectives. I took to religiously going to the gym, and while I was a late bloomer in this regard, I put a lot of time and effort into getting more muscular than I was when I had first started college.
At one point, Michelle asked me to go to the gym with her. At this point in time, while I thought she was cute and nice, I had not developed an infatuation with her. I thought this was a perfect opportunity to showcase that I had diligently spent so much time getting muscular to a cute girl and happily agreed to go. It didn't bother me that, at that time, Michelle was dating another guy.
We met up at the gym fully clothed; I remember it was Winter. We spoke our hellos and separated to change in the locker rooms. I remember exiting the locker room, changed, and waiting in the foyer of the gym for her. She emerged from the locker room in short running shorts, a t-shirt and big white running sneakers. At that moment, the shape of her legs hit my psyche like a jetliner crashing at full speed into a mountain. Something in my brain snapped. My heart began to race and I lost all ability with words. I'm sure I flushed bright red as I looked at her. I remember getting a huge goofy grin, looking down at her, and saying "wow... I like your legs...". I don't remember what she said back to me.
We went into the gym and she separated from me to sit and ride the recline bike machine. I had never successfully dated girls, and like an idiot I separated from her without hesitation and began on my workout routine. I ascended onto stair climber, ran up the stairs at high speed for 30 minutes and then continued around the gym, performing one or two sets of ten reps on all of the machines, lifting the max weight that I could handle. I was focused on performing well, thinking that I was being watched, but did not hover around Michelle with my tongue hanging out of my mouth as I probably should have.
I remember finishing the workout, meeting up with Michelle and her boyfriend, and walking through a corridor back to the locker rooms. I remember her hopping a few times, and her boyfriend asking if she was "bunny hopping".
Shortly after that, Michelle broke up with her boyfriend. I stayed in contact with her, but did not put forth incredible effort to pursue her because she had been openly targeted by another friend of mine. Plus, how could I think that I would be worth anything to her -- a white guy from Syracuse when she was a rich Chinese girl from Jersey.
I stayed in touch with her for a long time, helped her find an apartment when she found a job after college, and she moved back to NYC. After graduating, she stopped answering text messages and AIM chats.
But... To this day, I have never met another girl that looked like her or has instantly snapped my psyche the way that she did. She visited my apartment once when I was sitting on the floor, staring at pictures of her that I downloaded from her Facebook account and hid away in the resources file folders of Windows. It was so naughty to have pictures of her on my computer, and I did my best to hide them. But I would stare at her for so long... She visited my apartment once and startled me out of my delirium. I probably smelled like sex. She came into my apartment and sat on the couch. I was too shy and nervous to make a formal move on her... But I fixate on the idea of doing just that.
In my fantasies, in my dreams, in the fabric that I weave with my meditations and desires... I am taken by the celestial guardians of Michelle and locked in place in this pink, fuzzy room. I sit naked, on my knees, with my hands cuffed behind my back. Michelle stands before me... not even naked, in a short pink skirt and a white t-shirt, like a cute little Chinese lamb, with her phone against her ear. No form, no person, no photograph, no video, no cam girl... Nothing excites me so immediately and so furiously the way that Michelle does. Sitting on my knees, worshipping her form, I am immediately erect and hard and pulsing for her. My penis quivers and trembles and whimpers simply being in the presence of her form.
I sit for a long time, silent, staring at her perfect form. Like a Goddess.
"So," she finally says, perhaps not with words, "you think that I look like a Buddhist Goddess statue?"
"You are like the most perfect Buddhist Goddess statue on Earth, like the manifestation of all of life's lust, mean for the very peak of an Indian temple" I say, softly, my penis quivering and shaking still, already so hard and erect, throbbing furiously.
She stands there a moment, with her phone to her ear... Perhaps taking in the sight of me, kneeled on my knees before her, naked, my penis so hot and hard for her and trembling. "You just like my legs..." she says coyly, and shifts her stance.
I cannot control myself, my penis throbs so hot at the shape of her naked Chinese legs. I can smell her scent coming to me, my penis quivering hotter. I cannot say anything, but my hips begin to buck slightly upwards and towards her. "You have the most perfect Chinese legs Michelle..." I utter, exasperated. "I love your Chinese legs Michelle..."
