"You ain't heard nothing yet, kid," Arleen retorted with a smirk.
"After a while on one of our Thursday dates Patrick told me that he had met a young lady and they had feelings for each other and he thought she might be 'The One.' He didn't know just where they were headed, but it might come to be a problem with our arrangement. Then he proceeded to service me with enthusiasm and skill.
"A month later he told me that Connie would be moving in. He said he had explained about our unusual relationship, and asked if she thought we could keep it up, for my sake. He said she was taken aback, but he suggested that she should come over and meet me and talk things over. So she did. I told her my story over a cup of coffee, and lo and behold, we became friends. And Connie agreed to be out of the house on our date nights. She even loaned me "The Joy of Sex," so I could learn some moves.
"Then Jacob found out. He came over while Patrick and I were in bed and asked me to come home. He wasn't angry, but he was upset. I explained the situation to him. He was a gentle man, and he took the information and processed it. He said he would pray for us, because in his mind, I had not only been breaking my vows, but we had been sinning against God. I should tell you that I never shared that belief with him, but to him it was a real thing.
"Our lease on that house was up two days later, so Jacob packed us up and moved us to the next town down the road. I only had time to return Connie's book before we left. He let me send a post card with no return address telling them that I was okay. We've had no contact with each other since that day until now."
Connie and I had been listening quietly, and observed that while her children went through a rash of emotions, our kids just looked astonished to have learned this new somewhat kinky information about their parents.
Arleen stopped and went in to the kitchen. "I need a glass of wine. Anybody else? The men refreshed their beers and the ladies had their wine glasses topped off, and Arleen resumed her story.
"Things were very quiet between Jacob and me after we moved. There was never a fight, no harsh words, just a kind of disappointed silence. Jacob continued to drive back to his job, and continued his volunteer work. And I think he realized that I needed more in life than what he had been providing. He suggested that I take some courses at the junior college in town and maybe learn some skills to be able to work part-time out of the house. I was grateful, and I got signed up for classes, but then everything turned on its head. A month after we had moved I missed my period. I was panicked. I went to the doctor and sure enough, I was pregnant.
Realization began to move like a spirit around the room.
"That baby sure as heck wasn't Jacob's," she said, laughing. "I didn't know what I would do. I didn't know if Jacob would throw me out on my ear, because he had always made clear that he didn't want kids. And I could not imagine him wanting to raise somebody else's kids. Oh, I was a mess. I cried for hours when Jacob wasn't home, but put on a brave face for him when he came in.
"Well, I knew that sometimes women miscarried or something, so I held off on telling Jacob about it until the third month. I realized I couldn't keep it to myself any longer, so I broke the news to him."
"Wait a minute, Mom," Connie said. "Do you mean we have an older sibling you never told us about? How could you keep that a secret?"
"No, dear, there isn't another child. When the time came for the baby to be born, Jacob took me to the hospital. He had helped me to outfit a nursery in the third bedroom - we had never slept together in the same room - and he joined the other expectant dads in the waiting room while I went to the birthing room and delivered a baby boy. And then a baby girl."
Jaws dropped around the room. Connie and I looked at each other, and at our younger namesakes, and fell back in our chairs. "You mean, Jacob isn't our dad?" Pat asked puzzled.
"Damn, Pat, how dense are you?" asked his sister, who clearly had grasped the situation more quickly than her brother. She pointed at me. "That's your dad. And mine." He still looked confused.
"Jacob was wonderful," Arleen went on. "He put his name on the birth certificate so my babies would be legal, and for three years he helped me to manage the two of you. You called him 'Daddy' and he loved you to pieces. But there was always an undercurrent between us that this situation just wasn't right. He knew I needed more than he could give me, emotionally and physically. And despite his gallant acceptance of the situation, he still felt the betrayal. And not only that, but once I recovered from pregnancy and delivering twins, I was horny again, and he knew it.
"So after three years we decided to separate. We agreed to a no-fault divorce, since by putting his name on the birth certificate the annulment option was no longer available. He provided me with enough money to get an apartment and get started in my new life. I had met a guy at college and we seemed to be hitting it off. A year after Jacob and I divorced, Bill Jackson and I got married. He adopted these two great kids and he was a devoted and dedicated step-father. They had memories of Jacob, and I always led them to believe he had been their father. They have always treasured that photograph," and she pointed to the picture I had seen of Jacob with the twins on his lap. "That picture was taken the day the kids and I moved out. They are all smiling in the photo, but in truth it was a hard day, especially for Jacob. We were moving on to an exciting new chapter in our lives. He was losing his family. I will always be grateful to Jacob for the way he saved me, protected me, encouraged me, and then sent me and the kids on our way. I doubt there are many men on earth who would have done the same with the sort of kindness and love he showed."
"What became of Jacob?" Connie asked.
"Well, he resumed his life as a bachelor. He continued working and volunteering and worshipping and praying. We stayed in touch, but I was always vague to the kids about it, because he and I did not want the kids to be confused as they built their relationship with Bill. And of course he was 15 years older than I was. When he hit the age to qualify he started getting meals on wheels. He wound up moving into an assisted living facility run by the church when he got too old to fend for himself, and he died in 2001. I have a little cry on his birthday every year."
There was a wave of emotions in the room at that point, nobody really quite sure what do do next. Connie finished her story:
"You know, I named the kids after you two because I was so grateful to you for what you had done for me. I was a damaged and shy person, afraid to do anything that Jacob did not ask me to do. You made me realize, each of you, that I could do things for myself, that I could make decisions for myself, and that I was worthy. I never imagined that this day would come, that we'd be all together," and she looked around the room and spread her arms, "and I never told them about you because when they were kids it would have been confusing and when they were bigger there was really no reason I could see why they needed to know. But when you reached out to me I realized that they had a right to know who their biological father is - you know, they never questioned that they don't look much like Jacob.
"So, anyway, with the encouragement I had had from you two and with Jacob's help I got my Associates Degree, and with Bill's help with the kids I got a job working as a bookkeeper at a business in town, and Bill and I settled into a normal family life - the first time I had ever experienced such a thing. The kids and Bill loved each other, and life moved on. Bill got a job here in Boulder so we moved here. But he had a heart attack at work when he was 55 and died in the hospital two days later. He had life insurance and that paid for the twins' college education and gave me a little security for my old age. I made enough at work to get along, and now I'm retired."
