His Big Secret

I'm standing in front of my closet, waiting on him to send his address, and trying to decide what outfit to put on. I slowly slide the sides of my thong over the curve of my prominent ivory hips. The lace trim coming to rest in the hidden crease of my waist. "Will he back out, is he really serious?" We have been flirting online for awhile now, I think he likes me. I'm pulling my lowest cut sundress down over my when I hear the ding of my phone. "Is he just trying to fuck, like all the others, or is it different this time?"

I pull up to the address he gave me and notice it's a school parking lot. "He didn't even give me his actual address". I text him that I'm there and wait, my heart beating loud enough that I'm sure he'll hear it as soon as he gets in. I slide my hands inside the top of my dress, sliding over the nipple and pulling my chest up, making sure he'll notice my ample cleavage. "Does he even like big girls, or am I just another play thing? Does it even matter? What do I even want?" I know I look great. Most men can't resist the allure of my sexuality when they aren't being watched, when there aren't others around. Alone I see the hunger, the desire. Alone I hear the quickened breath as they take in my beauty. Under the weight of the judgement of others, I'm invincible. I know my worth, but I also can't seem to resist the pull of physical validation.

He gets in the car. We start making small talk. My mind racing the entire time "He seems upset. Somethings off. Maybe he had a bad day? Do I look bigger in person? Is he turned off by me now that he is here? Am I enough? Can he see how amazing my breasts look in this light, begging to be touched?" I look down at them then up at him. "Don't let him see the doubt, confidence is hot." Reminding myself that my body is mine and people only have as much power as I grant them, but knowing at any sign of fake intimacy I'll lose all the false sense of control I held so tightly to just 20 minutes ago.

Searching for signs this is different, a soft touch of my face, brush my hair out of my eyes, a gentle caress of my thigh, something that says he likes me, he wants me. There is it, I see his hand move up to my face, I bite my lip, knowing what is about to happen. Mind racing.

His lips touch mine softly, and its like that's all I need to convince myself that giving my body to another man is okay, that somehow that small touch and a soft kiss is enough to for me. Our kissing becomes more passionate and its as if my boundaries are sugar dissolving in the wetness building between my thighs.

I can tell he wants me, his mouth exploring mine, pulling my lips into his mouth, I feel his hands discovering all my curves and contours. Reaching for the top of my dress pulling me free, looking down I see my full breast spilling out over my bra, taking a deep breath I his breath and the wetness of his tongue on my stiffing nipple. He takes me in his mouth and my eyes rolling back into my head.

I feel that familiar throbbing between my legs, the wet spot growing in my thong. I need to feel him in me. I reach down and feel he is getting hard. They always do, it never takes long. I want to feel his skin, to feel it growing hard and harder in my hand. To know that I still have that power. That I can have an incontrollable affect on men simply by yielding my sexuality over them, playing the hand I know always works. I unzip his pants, I need more.

I slowly try to maneuver my body past my steering wheel. I can feel the nervousness creeping in. The cramped space of my car reminds me of my size. I see him move his seat back, he knows I'm huge. "Fuck, how do we make this work. I'm ruining the moment. I want to ride him, to feel him deep inside me, but this isn't practical without fucking with our flow."

I give up, push my seat back and prepare myself to at least give him what I know he came for. How upset would he be if I stopped now. That's not fair to him, I should have known all long what he is here for. I turn to him with a sultry look in my eyes and tell him to lie back and let me take care of him.

I slowly take him in my hand, caressing his length, I didn't think he could get any harder until I bent over and brought him to my mouth. His fingers find my nipple. I felt him twitch as I run my tongue up him, swirling around the head. Repeating with slow, controlled movements before taking him down my throat. I know I give great head, it never takes long before they are both begging me to stop and continue all at once. My hand following the sloppy path my mouth leaves behind on his shaft. My fingers dancing around his sac, leading the way for my mouth. I take each one slowly into my mouth. I hear him hold his breath and know what's coming. He pulls my lips back to him and almost immediately finishes inside the warm wet suction of my mouth.

I swallow, pull myself back up, adjust my seat, pull my dress back up and give him a shy grin as he is zipping himself back up. I'm embarrassed as I see him trying to find a way to make his quick exit. Ashamed that I caved so quickly, that I was so easy, that he basically had to do nothing to get me to cater to him. He got what he needed for now.

He gives me a quick kiss good bye. I leave him there, with this look on his face as if he can't understand how he can keep his big secret a little longer.