The affair continued for a few months. Kelly kept seeing her boyfriend, or LD, as Heath called him (short for "Limp Dick"). She just couldn't make herself break it off with either man. Although LD had his short comings, he had some good qualities as well; he really did seem to care about her, maybe even love her -- Kelly was never really sure -- and he was certainly the stable type of man who would be a good provider for a family. But was she really ready to think about that? She was still a few years away from her 30th birthday. She knew she had time to plan for that life, eventually. And Heath was, well, Heath. There was really very little else to say. He was sexy and attentive and fun. And it always seemed like his first priority was to make her feel incredible and sexy and just plain satisfied.
And while at times it seemed like the answer was right in front of her, Kelly hesitated for larger, more concerning reasons. She and Heath never actually discussed being a "couple", and while Kelly was certainly not the type of woman who needed to have a man at all times, she couldn't help but wonder what would happen if she broke it off with LD and then she and Heath didn't work out at all. She could imagine an extremely tense working environment; assuming she wouldn't be fired first. After all, LD was the manager in her department, so
technically
they shouldn't be dating in the first place, but a break up would definitely cause some issues. Whenever Kelly got to thinking about the whole David Bowie and Queen song would pop into her head -- the real one, not Vanilla Ice's lame rip off.
There was one thing that she was certain about though: she was finding it harder to hide the truth. A few nights earlier Kelly had almost said Heath's name when she was with LD. What ended up coming out was "HEA-LL YES!" LD thought she was playing some sort of Southern Belle role and tried to play into it with a terrible southern accent, talking about the Confederacy and "the troops advancing". Everything just became really awkward and Kelly couldn't wait to get out of there.
And things with Heath were awkward as well at times. But that awkwardness revolved more around the meetings themselves: backseats of cars; dirty, no-tell motels; sneaking around in general. Kelly was starting to hate herself each time she set out to meet him somewhere off the beaten path, but as soon as she was with him, the world seemed to disappear into a fog of ecstasy.
It was toward the end of the fifth month of deception. Kelly was leaving the office for the evening. After saying good night to her friends and a nonchalant good night to LD (as always, keeping things professional), she walked toward the elevator, thinking about what she would do with the rest of her evening. She wasn't going over to LD's and she hadn't spoken with Heath for a couple days, so she didn't expect to see him. As the elevator doors slid open, Kelly stepped forward, practically running into Heath's hard, broad chest. Their eyes met; his twinkled.
"Excuse me," Kelly said, with a small smile.
"My fault entirely," Heath responded. "I shouldn't have been blocking the door."
He stepped aside and Kelly slipped in just before the doors shut.
As soon as the doors were closed Heath grabbed Kelly, pulling her close and pressing his mouth to hers. Her arms went around his neck and she opened her mouth to allow his tongue in before she knew what she was doing. The small ding of the elevator as it passed the floors quickly snapped her out of her shock.
"Stop it!" she exclaimed as she pushed him away. "There are cameras!"
"Hunny," Heath said in his smooth voice, "I know the security guards. The cameras in the elevators haven't worked in months."
"Oh" was all Kelly had time to say before Heath had her pressed against the wall, his hands stroking her sides while his mouth slanted over hers again and again.
When his lips moved to her neck, Kelly tilted her head to give him better access. Her eyes, already blurry with arousal, slid to the lights by the door. She vaguely realized that the ground floor was coming up.
"Heath..." she gasped, "ground floor..."
He sighed in frustration, but pulled himself away from her, slowly. He adjusted his tie and smoothed his hair as she pulled her skirt back down over her hips, not knowing when he'd pushed it up, and not really caring. As their breathing slowed, so did the elevator.
"Will I see you tonight?" Kelly heard herself ask before she could stop it.
"I hope so," Heath replied.
She looked at him, surprised at the way his voice shook when he spoke. It was an action that almost did her in. The fire in his eyes nearly consumed her. She saw that he wanted her as much as she did him. But what does that mean? Kelly asked herself.
Is he just horny or is there something more? Which do I want it to be?
she thought after a mental pause.
"8 o'clock? The motel off of Rt. 32?" Heath said.
Kelly nodded just as the doors glided open. They both stepped off the elevator, their hands brushing for the barest of seconds, and then went out the doors and their separate ways.
At 8 o'clock that night, after spending an hour and a half making herself look as sexy as she could, but also looking like it only took her half that amount of time, Kelly pulled off Rt. 32 and into the gravely parking lot of the rundown motel that didn't even have a name. It didn't need one. Everyone knew which motel it was, although no one admitted to knowing anything about it at all.
She sat in her car for a few minutes, mentally berating herself for, once again, agreeing to meet at this sleazy dive. She felt dirty just looking at it. The thought of going in and getting a room made her feel...well, like a whore. At that moment, Kelly thought she might burst into tears. It hit her that, while she cared about Heath more than she would ever admit to herself, she couldn't keep doing this -- meeting in these places, just to take a roll in the hay. She knew she had to tell him. Tonight. And before they did anything, otherwise she knew her resolve would be replaced by lust and she wouldn't have the chance to say what she needed to say: she wouldn't meet him in any more places like this. She was a lady and wanted to be treated as such. And if he didn't think he could do that, fine. That would solve her dilemma for her.
I just hope it doesn't end like that
, Kelly thought.
As Kelly was giving herself the pep talk, Heath pulled in next to her. He sat for a moment, staring at her. He was momentarily taken back, as he always was, by her classic beauty. In the time that they'd been, well, whatever they were, Heath had come to feel about Kelly in ways that he'd never felt for any woman. He hadn't yet decided what it meant, but he knew that he didn't like meeting her in these crummy places. He'd been trying to protect her privacy at first, but then it just became a habit.
Kelly looked up and was startled to see Heath staring at her. They both got out of their cars and smiled. Heath started to walk towards her when Kelly put up her hand to stop him.
"We need to talk about something first," Kelly started.
"Ok. Did you have a particular topic in mind?" he asked with a grin.
"Do you respect me?" Kelly blurted out.
Heath was surprised. That wasn't the question he'd been expecting. "Of course I do."
"Then why do we meet at these shit holes? If you respect me like you say you do you wouldn't choose these motels, or dark turn offs from roads, or any of the other places you would take someone you don't care about for a quick fuck."
As she was saying, well yelling since her voice continued to rise as she went on, all these things, Heath couldn't help but notice the way the color crept up in her cheeks, making them look beautifully flushed; or the way her eyes flashed, showing the fiery character that rested just below her surface; or the way she crossed her arms in front of her round, full breasts, hiding them, but at the same time accenting their perfection. He knew he shouldn't be aroused by her anger, but he couldn't help it. She was too damned sexy!
He knew she was waiting for a response. He took a step toward her. She took a step back, bumping into the edge of her car door, which she'd left open so that she could leave quickly if things didn't go the way she planned. Heath saw her wince as her hip hit the door. He held up his hands and asked, "Can I just come one step closer?"
Kelly nodded, and then instantly regretted it. That one step brought him right up to her. She could smell his cologne and feel his warmth even though they weren't touching yet. She stared at his chest, knowing that if she looked up she was done. He placed a finger under her chin and lifted her head. He lowered his to her and laid the softest kiss on her slightly parted lips. Kelly sighed a little and leaned into him. When Heath pulled back, he looked at her and said, "You're right."
She wasn't sure how to respond at first. She had at least expected some sort of debate, but his outright agreement threw her off.
"What?" she asked.
"I said you're right. I don't like meeting in these places either. I thought you would prefer it so that no one would see you cheating on LD, so I went along, but I always feel terrible about bringing you to these places. You're right. They're shit holes."
And at that moment the tension bubble popped and both of them started to laugh. Heath pulled her into his arms and gave her a warm kiss that, if she didn't know any better, almost felt like there was something more behind it. But Kelly refused to let herself think that far, at least not yet.
When they pulled apart, Heath, with a smile still on his face, softly touched Kelly's cheek, brushing her hair behind her ear.
"So what do you want to do?" he asked.
"Um, actually I hadn't even thought about it. I wasn't sure how the conversation was going to go." She paused for a moment, then asked, without looking up, "Do you want to come back to my place?"
