Handicapped Love

If you think having a date and getting serious while one is in a wheelchair, try to imagine having a double wheelchair date. Well I did and this is my story of dating André.

It was 2017. I had worked for years at the tourist information center in my city, behind the desk and as a cashier but in 2016 I got the wheelchair I am now in. I am in a lying position with my legs forward, from the pelvic bend upwards and slightly spread. My body is not completely flat lying, I can still look fairly forward, but straight contact between me and my opposite is always distant. I wasn't able to do cashier or shop work any more and I started guiding at a world war one museum side. There I met André. He was also in a power wheelchair. I had seen him before during a handicaped group day trip and although cute with a handsome face I thought he was a dork, quite childish. He was himself overweight but couldn't help making remarks about me. Not in a vicious way, more like 'look who's talking', pointing out his own weight. Still very annoying.

André's work was at the brochure and souvenir stand. It was hard for him because he was not good at talking or socialising with other people and especially abled people. He didn't hear well, despite a hearing aid and was very shy. When someone would say something he considered harsh or unpleasant he freezed unable to do anything. André however had a very friendly, likeable face and appearance and most of the museum visitors were friendly and patient people.

André recognized me right away on my first day, knowing my name, what I did and many other details he must have heard during that day trip to the Antwerp Harbour. He looked at me a little nervous. I know that look from many handicapped young men, when they see a woman. Towards abled handsome women they look unabashedly, to breasts and crotch laughing and making sexual comments, or unwanted gestures.

But towards women in their own date-able league, behavior is only controlled by hormones, without boundaries. They quickly turn physical, sexually herasting. I think in society there is no more sexuall heressmant than in a nursery home. Many times I had an unwanted hand on my boobs or in my lap. And among them boy's, seeing is copying. Once a boy, with his wheelchair next to mine, managed to shift his weight so far sideways that he fell over onto my boobs. For the other men in the nursery home he was the man, and they cheered and laughed, trying to copy this. This then went on for months leading to every girl having a face in their crotch at least once. Some of them liked it though, sexuall tension is also obvious among the women.

This tension was also visible with André that day. Not impending though and I admit I was flattered. He was friendly and hoped to have a helping hand and companion for the tasks at his stand. I agreed of course to look out for him, but actually he managed well, just lacked some confidence sometimes. So unlike our not so good first meeting, it went well and quickly we expressed our feelings for each other.

Now getting physical with double wheelchairs is hard. André's upper body is, like mine, very restricted and besides feeling each other it's hard to bind. So after only 2 or 3 weeks we started thinking about a private time together. André lived with his parents, so it would be in my home. There is a private room in my nursery home that we can use. Sex is allowed in our own room too, but there are only single beds. Making it actually only possible with a non handicapped partner. The private room is nice, but of course it is different then being intimate between one's own 4 walls. Everything is possible though in the private room, for all kinds of patients. Even if both can't move a finger there are devices that can help. We needed some technical help either. It took some time though until we could have our moment.

For two patients who want to have intercourse and need help for the action itself a sexuologist is appointed. It takes up a lot of time from the staff. That's why the two involved have to know what they want, what they can expect and that they are really sure. Then the medical issues have to be discussed and the 2 lovers have to know everything about each other's issues. We had 3 meetings and with each meeting André's parents were present. They didn't hold back questions and remarks about me and my body and that was hard to bear. But André was too hesitant and they filled that gap making sure he would know what to expect and what to do. Then there was the thing of reliability that had to be solved. Nursery homes love rules, and we had to adapt some. Then a contract was made to avoid legal conflict between us and the nursery home. Nisa, the sexuologist, made a plan we agreed to and then all hurdles were taken and then we could have our time.

I had my doubts that I should write down some details, but I will. If you just want to read about a romance you might skip the next chapter.

I was prepared in my own room and André in the private room. My bowel and bladder were emptied, as well as André's. He needed some medication to become hard and was also pumped. André was gonna be naked, I kept my compression stockings on. It makes me feel more confident when the skin on my thighs is flattened. I was laid on the bed first, while André was still prepared in the bathroom. My back was flat on the mattress with my legs upwards and tied up in brackets, more widely than my natural position. This was not comfortable but needed. André was to be attached to a hoist, hanging in a lifting blanket around his belly and upper legs.

Next to my head were 2 bars he could hold on to and move his body. His movements were increased and supported by the hoist device. He was rolled in by Nira, and then the nurses left the room. Nira lifted André on top of me. The hoist blanket laid already on top of me and Nira closed the blanket and put him in position. I was supposed to lead his penis and use some lubricant, Nira then left the room. The bed hoist was great. With only very limited afford his body would go in every direction. We tried and failed a few times, but then we just kissed and touched each other.

André was great, he admired me, my body and made me feel good. Kissing was just as important for him as touching my breasts or actual intercourse. He was sincerely interested in my body, and sometimes he hovered around in the hoist, turning, going up and down, forth and back. Holding his legs I could guide him where to go. It was just good fun. Hanging in there for a long time was hard though and he turned and lowered himself on me. I guided his penis again and he kept lying quiet on top of me for a while. It felt good. His medication still worked for a while and we could take things easy and as comfortable as possible for André.

We took our time and after almost 2 hours we were both exhausted, I unlocked the hoist from the lifting blanket and unleashed it from his body. André rolled next to me on the bed. My legs were still spread and tied up. There was not much space for him and he was pressed against me which felt nice. We stayed another hour like that before calling a nurse. She unleashed my legs, and lowered them out of the brackets. We got both prepared for the night and put back in the bed. We had a great night, talking and having fun. The relationship lasted for about 4 month. We had a great time, and we are still friends now. Sometimes getting socially on one line is harder than the physical part. It's a lifetime search I guess..