A lot of black women act like they don't need sex, or that anyone can replace a brother's sexing, which is quite simply preposterous. Don't believe any of these insane bitches. The black man's strength and sexual prowess is a wonder to behold and the gift that keeps on giving. Ask Babette Grissom, also known as Granny Babette. This fiery soul sister is still very much a fan of the black man, and she could teach today's young black women a thing or two about the ancient art of B.M.A. or Black Male Appreciation. That's what this story is all about.
Who is the much vaunted Granny Babette, you may ask? A curvaceous, deliciously thick, dark-skinned black woman living in the City of Ottawa, Ontario. Recently, Granny Babette has become the Choir Director of her local church, and this is a promotion which the feisty mature black lady doesn't take lightly. A strong black woman always steps up to help her people. The future of the black church is its young black women and young black men. They must be protected and mentored until the time is right for them to lead the future of the black church and that of the black community. Granny Babette firmly believes that last part.
Granny Babette has a bone to pick with the young black women of the black church, mostly the way they mistreat so many nice young black men. Apparently, mistreating young black men and bragging about it online is considered the cool thing to do among young black women nowadays, and the black church is no exception. The lead culprit is Esther Paulson, a skinny Jamaican chick with an attitude problem. Esther thinks she's all that, and she went public after breaking up with a young black man named Stephen Felton. It's a damn shame that such a fine brother was stuck on a useless broad like Esther as far as Granny Babette was concerned.
Esther Paulson is the niece of Minister Roger Paulson, a stern, silver-haired black gentleman who happens to be the church's newest pastor. Anyone who has ever been to a black church knows that the pastor, and his family, are treated like royalty in the church. As a result of the inevitable nepotism that follows, Esther Paulson acts as though she is royalty in the damn church. In other words, what Esther says goes, and Little Miss Popular has a posse of young black women at her beck and call. Think of the old movie Mean Girls, only with a chocolate cast, alright?
When Esther Paulson split with Stephen Felton, she decided to make the brother's life a living hell and would have gotten away with it too if not for the timely intervention of Granny Babette. The feisty mature black mama notices all the fine brothers in the church but Stephen Felton is special to her, not just because she's friends with his mother Astrid Felton. Stephen Felton is a true gentleman from the old school, and he has a handsome face and a rock-hard body. If Esther Paulson is dumb enough to let go of a fine specimen like that, then she doesn't deserve to get any more chocolate. Ever.
Granny Babette is a forthrightly bisexual black mama who loves both the ladies and the fellas. A handsome brother like Stephen Felton is too good to pass up, and if the young broads don't want him, then Granny Babette is calling first dibs on his chocolate stick. The sexual powers of young black men fascinate just about everyone on the planet earth, and it seems that young black women are not in the least bit appreciative of those powers. That's why a lot of young black men start banging white ladies. Well, Granny Babette is about to claim Stephen Felton for the dark side...
"Stephen, my friend, you will find way better than Esther," Granny Babette assured the miserable and forlorn young brother, after Esther and her girlfriends started giving him the cold shoulder at church. Stephen, a cute brother who looks like a young Denzel, smiled bravely at Granny Babette. The brother had a lot going on for him, even if he didn't seem to realize it. Stephen is in his final year at Algonquin College and once he's done, he's going to have a government job or a private sector job. The brother is bilingual, and a brilliant student, how could he fail?
"Thank you ma'am," Stephen told Granny Babette, and she gave him a kindly smile, then invited him over to her house for tea after the church ceremony. Stephen, a somewhat naïve brother didn't see the writing in the wall. After church, Granny Babette drove back to her house, with Stephen in the passenger seat. The brother kept whining about how he missed Esther and wished she would stop being so mean to him. Granny Babette wished Stephen would shut the fuck up about Esther, but she played it cool. There is only one way to help a man get over a woman, and that's another woman.
