It was a Monday afternoon and I was at the supermarket. A job I had been scheduled to do had fallen through at the last moment. I couldn't complete my work until the plumbers had finished theirs and the plumbers had had an unfortunate meeting with a truck, delaying them somewhat. Instead of standing around I went home early, stopping by the supermarket on the way.
It's amazing how many people are not at the supermarket on a Monday afternoon. You could shoot a cannon down any aisle and be fairly confident of not hitting anyone. Over-busy, they were not.
Strolling through the fruit and vegie section I beheld a lovely sight. Girl, twenty, loose top, no bra, leaning over to select something. I, being a healthy young man, ie - perpetually horny, manoeuvred to be in a choice viewing position. I had a splendid eyeful, her top gaping enough when she leant forward to reveal all.
Perhaps I was a little too obvious in my peeping. Maybe she was just very astute. Either way, she caught on to what I was doing and hurriedly straightened up, looking rather indignant.
"That's right," she snapped at me. "Take a good look."
Well, really, there's an invitation you don't get every day. I just naturally reached for her blouse and pulled it down and to the side, letting a very nice breast pop into view.
"Very nice," I was assuring her when she made a strange noise and slapped my hand away as she tidied up her blouse. That was OK. While she was doing that I was lifting her skirt and pulling the front of her panties out so I could look down them.
Another odd noise and my hands were slapped away again as she finished tidying up, glaring at me while she did so.
"What the hell do you think you're playing at?" she demanded.
"You told me I could," I protested. Well, she had.
I thought for a moment she was going to blow a fuse.
"That was sarcasm, moron," she snarled.
"Oh. In that case I suppose I should apologise."
I shut my mouth without doing so and contemplated her. I knew her, I realised. Not really well, but I did know her. She had a reputation for being a bit of a flirt and a bit of an exhibitionist. I suppose that bit of exhibitionism was the reason for the loose necked blouse and no bra.
"Well?" she asked.
"Well what?" I asked.
"The apology."
"I said I should apologise, Janet," I explained. "I didn't say I would."