It is raining, she hadn't noticed how hard before, but she had been distracted. It had been all she could do to keep her face and hair covered as she ran out of the bar and to her car. A quick glance at the rear view told her that all was well, a little wiping here, a little smudging there - and she was a renewed goddess. She smiled her red lipped smile, batted her eyelashes - and adjusted the mirror just in time to avoid being blinded by the car beside hers backing out. That nice man that had offered her a walk to her car under his umbrella, surely so he could get one more glance at her body. She looked good tonight and she knew it...
The early evening had been the end of the rituals of daily life; rides to daycare, rides to baseball practice, dinner for the family at home hurried by her need to get a little "me" time this particular evening with the girls. She served little smiles, a neat and tidy dinner, kissed the man of the house on the cheek as she made promises about "early night - but don't wait up," as she'd walked out the door. Her husband had smiled and waved her on, sympathetic eyes urging her to "get out while you can," as the door slammed shut behind her. She hadn't spent as much time as a young woman would have getting ready to go out, but that was only because she wasn't a young girl anymore. Fanciful debates about "what looked best," were long in here past, and though she still considered herself a shopping girl, there were fewer "evening" outfits in her wardrobe, and certainly more mommy appropriate attire. This particular evening, while efficient, she'd managed to shave her legs (and everything else), get her hair and makeup in place in the 13 minutes she had to do so. When the subject of attire appeared, she surprised herself and chose a particularly sexy bra (the kind that you pay way too much for, and didn't want to wear for an extended time - but looked great and made you feel 10 years your junior), a form fitting pair of jeans, and a bustier that showed off the bra in all the right ways. She'd glanced at the full length as she walked out of her bedroom, toward the garage, and remembered thinking "I'm me again." Me before the two girls, the endless breastfeeding and yoga pants; me before the diet and exercise, the millions of miles on the elliptical and then again on foot through the neighborhood to ensure that the jeans fit in all the right places.
"No thank you," she'd said to the nice man with the umbrella. She'd been watching him all night...watching her. It felt nice to be admired, her husband was too busy with work and more work - the days easily bleeding into the nights for him. It wasn't that he was neglecting her, it wasn't that she felt neglected....it was just nice to know that someone out there viewed her as an object of pure physicality without all the fuss of emotional entanglement, long term relationship mess... just in the "I'd like to see what you look like with those tight jeans around your ankles" kind-of way. She stepped out from under the awning and the rain hit her immediately. The night was warm - but this rain was cool, the goosebumps instantly tearing across her shoulders and down her chest. She could feel her nipples grow firm, and graze that sheer material in the bra she'd chosen, she turned and smiled at the nice man with the umbrella, glancing down as her swollen nipples peeked through the soft material of her top. "Guess you weren't expecting a show - but I hope it's worth it." The man's eyes widened, his eyes were fixed on hers, and she remembered thinking how noble it was for him not to stare down at her tits, and she realized then that she'd been smiling at him when she said it.
She had been there to meet a friend, a long desperate sexually deprived, long-winded, self defeatist friend. The early evening had been filled with stories about long lost opportunities, should have's, would have's and could have's. She'd been lost in her own thoughts for at least the next two hours amidst the war stories and feel-bad-for me conversation. Not the way she'd intended to spend her one free evening, but at least there was alcohol and in great quantities. She'd caught the eye of a nice looking man across the bar, seated alone. He had that look, the one that said he was oh so obviously waiting for someone - and obviously going to be disappointed that she wasn't going to show up. Yet every single time she'd catch the man staring at her, looking her up and down as if he was trying to figure out if she was why he was there. "Jesus, listen to me - I'm pathetic, at least you don't have to worry about any of this" her friend suddenly had blurted out, "I mean, of all the husbands - yours is the best, I bet you get it whenever you want," she finished. Sex? Had they been talking about sex this whole time, certainly her head nods, "uh huh's" and "you're rights," couldn't be quantified as "sex talk."
"Sure, any time we want..." she said, timidly, half thinking her friend would pick up and move through that subject further - uncovering her secret truth.
Her husband was a sexual man, that was for sure, and so was she. Early in their relationship, they'd solidified each others role - with he more dominant, and she more submissive. The sex was great, and still was...provided either of them got the time for it these days. No sadly, she was in the same boat with every other parent, sex starved, nearly vocationally. Long bouts of love making had given way to far more seldom, shorter romantic interludes. "Quickies were just as good as long-ies" she'd always tell him, but the truth was, they'd had marathon sexual encounters early on, and she missed those. She masturbated all the time, any chance she got - in the morning in the bath, late at night while everyone was sleeping, sometimes feet spread - hand against the wall - furiously stroking her tiny clitoris in the closet while getting dressed - any chance to come would center her, get her through her day. Her husband had been okay with it, even encouraging on multiple occasions - the need to see her please herself was evident when he caught her with her hand in her pants. Often times, he'd help, moving his fingers alongside hers, inside her up into her moist, damp places while stroking her soft skin - it wasn't enough. Sometimes, she wanted to just be fucked, have her pants yanked down around her ankles, her hair pulled, bitten gently as she was violated from behind. There wasn't enough of that these days - and through no fault of anyone but two tiny shrieking people who'd rather see her tits used for food rather than see them used for her sexual gratification.
She was wet, instantly - it made her a little uncomfortable, sitting there with a friend half drunk out of her mind. She raced to find the reason, and it was all she could do not to come in her pants when she replayed the thought process back and got to "I just want to be fucked." She shifted in her seat nervously; had all these people noticed, had her friend - that she was soaked and every attempt to move her pelvis was slowed by her own avoidance to come all over the seat? What was it about the idea - getting fucked, having no emotional attachment to the physical act, she wondered, composing herself. She stood straight up, announcing to her friend that she needed another drink and made her way to the bar and back and took at deep breath as she sat back down. All at once, she was comfortable again, a quick scan of the room had indicated that no one was the wiser...until she looked at that nice man who'd been looking her way. A long smile dragged across his lips as her eyes caught his, he quickly turned his gaze down into the bourbon glass pushed to his lips. He was very good looking she thought, green eyes, an easy smile, hair seemed long and scraggly but wet - looked neat and pushed back. He looked like a man after a woman, his clothes were neat but not impeccable, he needed a shave - and why on earth he'd chose to meet a girl in a dive like this, a nesting ground for drunken soccer moms and PTA refugees was not exactly a happening night spot.