List of Characters
Jack: Our point of view. Smart, corny, neurotic, Jack has few friends at school outside of his study group. White. Lifeguards in the summer and has a big dick.
Pri: Jack's ex(?). Brilliant and reserved, she plays varsity soccer with her best friend Liv. Indian-American. Short and athletic with ass for days, darkly tanned with thick black hair.
Liv: Pri's best friend and Jack's study buddy. Funny and dynamic, she plays varsity soccer and does what she feels. Jewish. Tall with a heart-shaped face. She has a deep tan, small breasts, and sprinter's legs.
Marco: Liv's boyfriend and long-time friend. Charming and almost offensively handsome, he teaches tennis and studies literature. Colombian-American. He's fashionable, with a lean, muscular body.
Sylvie: Liv's long-time frenemy and Marco's ex. Grim and sarcastic, she's pre-law at NYU. Pale, Jewish, and tiny, with a cute face and a bull ring septum piercing.
Kay: Sylvie's friend from NYU. Laconic and up for anything, they study film and play volleyball. White and non-binary, they're over six foot and covered with tattoos. Bleached pixie cut and dark eyelids.
Grace: Liv's friend from college. Perky and energetic, she's All-State softball and loves to party. Chinese-American. She's muscular but feminine, with thick legs, big breasts, and fun tattoos.
~
I jerked awake to the reverbed amps of prog rock sliding thin and tinny from the speaker of my phone. Head throbbing, mouth dry, I cursed my stupid self for such a stupid alarm. I fumbled until I snoozed it, or turned it off, or factory reset the fucking thing.
God, I was hungover.
God, I was starting to hate drinking.
I sat up creakily and stared at the wall. After a while I realized I was looking at a painting. It was clearly supposed to be capital-A Art. To me it was just a drab rural scene with little gray clouds and little gray sheep on a little gray hill. The blinds were shut, thank god, but the darkness gave the painting an eerie, apocalyptic feel.
On my nightstand I found evidence that Pri had been here: two painkillers, a glass of water, and a banana. I chewed the fruit into paste and shoved the pills in.
The more I tried the less I remembered of last night. It was only by giving up and letting myself think of nothing that the memories appeared out of the fog. Memories of drinking, of flirting, of measuring my dick. Of jerking off.
Jesus,
had I really done that? The shame was there, and the embarrassment too, but they'd been dulled along with everything else.
After the...
incident
, no one had even mentioned the fucked-up-edness. Some of them actually kept
drinking
. I remembered gliding past them in the kitchen, ripping apart three servings of garlic bread, and going to bed before anyone else had even left the table. Did I throw up? If I didn't I should have.
I'd thought I could make some normal friends for once. I liked these people. How the hell could I face them now? I ran a hand through my hair and pulled at the roots. What a fucking mess.
My stomach flopped, empty and greasy at the same time. I needed water. I needed coffee. I sorted roughly through my suitcase until I found a tank top and my sunglasses and I crept out the door. The basement hallway was filled with light from a nearby window. I almost hissed. Like a vampire, every cell in my body screamed and vibrated. Muffled conversation came from somewhere above me.
At the bottom of the stairs the voices started to resemble language. It was the girls, all the girls and Kay at least, chatting away like everything was fine and dandy and great.
"You know how when somebody is too hot and it's kinda like they're another species?" It sounded like Grace. "Like, 'I can't mate with you, we'll make a zorse.'"
"I do not know that," said a low, raspy voice that was definitely Sylvie. "I don't think I've ever seen someone so hot it turned me off."
"You have to say that," said Liv. Her throat was scratchy and raw too, like she'd been up all night shouting. "You can't be like, 'Yeah, Marco looks fucking weird, that's why I dated him.'"
"Nuh," said Kay in their monotone. "Some of the models we get for shoots look like fish-people, or aliens. And that's coming from me, a big, weird looking bitch."
"You're not weird looking..."
"Notice she didn't correct the bitch part."
"So you think Marco looks like an alien?" asked Pri. She sounded... fine. Good even. Not stressed, not even hungover. It sounded like everyone was up there
but
Marco. If they were at all anxious or concerned about last night, they weren't showing it.
"What?" Kay again. "Nah, Marco is fuckin' hot. I'm just saying that's true sometimes."
"I just think Jack is more
approachably
cute," said Grace. "Like, I wouldn't feel stupid asking him out." There was a long silence. "If there wasn't the whole thing between you two, I mean. Obviously."
I'd frozen, one foot on the lowest step. At the top, the door to the kitchen hung open a good six inches, a stripe of brilliant sunlight painted against the wall. Even though I knew it was wrong, I sat down to listen.
"He does have a nice body," said Liv. "Not as good as Marco obviously, but nice. And he's got those fucking shovels for hands.
Mmm
. Love big hands on a guy. Just
scoop me up
."
"He's got swimmer's back. Or whatever these things are up here."
"Lats? They're like... armpit abs. Makes 'em look fucking hench."
"Or forearms. Anyone else have a thing for thick forearms?"
"Ya, I'm sure it's his thick
forearms
that you like..."
Pri laughed awkwardly. "I liked him before all that, but I didn't mind his big... penis."
"I love how you say 'penis' and never, like, dick... or
cock
. You're so fucking cute."
"Fine," she said dryly. "His big swinging
cock
. His girthy
manhood
or whatever."
"Since we went there..." said Sylvie. Liv scoffed audibly. "Jack is the only one who's 'like another species.' Forget the friggin' biomass, I've never seen someone cum that much. Like even in porn."
"That was fuckin' crazy." Kay again. "It was like--you ever pour out too much detergent on accident?"
"
Oh yeah
, it was definitely a full load." That set off a round of laughter.
"I'm glad you were able to work it out," said Grace. "You make a really sweet couple."
"That's not..." started Pri. "We're not, like, together."
"Uh, you could have fooled me," said Sylvie. "What was last night then?"
"Last night was just for fun," said Liv neatly. "Don't read too much into it."
"That true?" pressed Sylvie. "Or do you just need it to be true?"
Liv laughed sharply. "You're acting like you didn't fucking participate."
"I didn't do anything."
"You sure as hell didn't leave, Syl."
"I'm supposed to go hide in my room? With all the huffing and grunting coming through the wall? Gag me
.
"
Grace laughed nervously. "I mean, I was really drunk. I don't even really remember what happened..."
"You're full of shit too," said Liv.
"I remember
some
stuff obviously--"
"You remember beating up your pussy with Jacky's dick swinging two feet from your face?"
"Ew, the fucking unnecessary imagery!" said Sylvie. I pictured her face crunching up in disgust. "Ugh. And besides, Pri was closest to
that
exhibit. Which is kinda my point. I--personally, no judgment--I don't suck people's dicks if I'm not interested in them."
