This story is for all the fans and alumni, junior or senior, that had the pleasure of marching and competing in the fraternity known as drum and bugle corps and especially to my fellow past and present members of the Hawthorne Caballeros.
RUMP!
Kirk
July 11, 1976 had been a strange and wonderful day for me. Not only did I turn 21, I met my bosses niece, Gabby, at a company picnic. After a rough start with her, we managed to find a way to relate to each other. Watching Janice, the store skank, getting boffed twice and then taking on a lady made it fun. The best part was doing it with Gabby, and being able to hang as long as we wanted at the park. Hal had set it all up from the beginning and it worked. I planned on thanking him in the morning.
I arrived home at 3:30 in the morning by way of the limo. Gabby still needed to be dropped off. I kissed her goodnight and headed into my apartment. I shed my clothes and fell in bed. I had three and a half hours to sleep before I had to get up and go to work.
************
I arrived at Hal's Market around 7:45. There were a few fellow employees waiting outside to be let in. One of them was Janice.
"Hey, there you are! Matt! What time did you get home last night?" she laughed, as her trademark cackle made my skin crawl.
Everyone that was standing there had his or her eyes focused on me, waiting for my answer.
"I don't want to talk about it," I replied.
"Aw shit! Come on man," said Fred from the deli department. "We tell you all the dirty details."
"This isn't just anybody, you know. This is Hal's niece. Forget it, I'm not talking about it," I said.
"Come on, Matt, share with us. You too were doing to deed, I'm sure," cooed Janice.
"I'd say you were sharing it enough yesterday to last a good long time," I replied to her.
"Okay Janice, who'd yah fuck?" asked Ron, the frozen food guy.
"'How many' would be a better question," I replied for her.
"Whoa!"
"Whew!"
"Way to go Janice!"
"Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha," she cackled.
"Don't tell me you have another one in the oven, Janice?" said Hal, as he obviously overheard us as he opened the door to let us in.
"God, I hope not," she cackled.
"Skank," we all said under our breaths, almost in unison, as we filed in.
************
Monday was always tough at the store. Everything was still done by hand and there were no night crews. We unloaded two trailers of freight on rollers and carts and then spent the second half of our day putting it up on the shelves, even while people were shopping. Believe me when I tell you, for a small supermarket, we did a big business. That store was crowded from the minute we opened till the moment we closed. I was dragging by the time the final thirty minutes of my shift started. I was hauling a huge load of cardboard to the back to be incinerated, when I bumped into Hal.
"I take it that you and my niece hit it off yesterday?" he asked.
"Yes, we did. Thank you for putting Gabby and I on the bus together like that," I replied.
"My sister tells me that Gabby has had a ton of boyfriends over the last few years, but they all seem to be after the same thing. Very few have taken her affections seriously with her Plain Jane face. I've told my sister that you're different than the others. Don't prove me wrong, Matt," said Hal. It wasn't a warning. It was more like a request.
"She is a little plain looking. But she has nice eyes," I said, trying to convince Hal that I saw more in her than just a great body.
"Oh, I almost forgot," he said, pulling an envelope out from under his arm. "This is for you."
I took the envelope from him and opened it. Inside was an award for being a dedicated employee for 5 years. Also, there was a $100.00 gift certificate for Wanamaker's. I had completely forgotten that this was my anniversary. I had started there on July 12th, 1971, the day after my 16th birthday.
"You also just earned yourself an extra weeks vacation," said Hal. "Now you have three. I hope you stay for another five years," he said, shaking my hand.
"Matt, you have a call on line four," said the PA system.
Hal waved me off to answer the call. I got worried, because I never got phone calls at work. I was hoping that nothing happened to a member of my family. I got to the phone in the produce department and picked it up.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Boy Scout. What's yah doing?"
"Gabby?"
"I can't put anything past you. I need a favor. When do you get off from work?" she asked.
"In about ten minutes," I said, looking at my watch.
"Great! I wanted to know if you'd pick me up from work. My mom is stuck at work until late."
Having just been inside this woman several times just 24 hours before, I couldn't think of a reason not to pick her up.
"Sure. No problem. Where are you?" I asked.
"Maxwell's Funeral Home," she replied. "Pull around the back and knock on the door marked 'deliveries'," she replied. "Thanks," she said, and hung up.
I stood there with my mouth hanging open, still holding the phone to my ear. I had completely forgotten that her job was applying make-up to the dead.
Now, there are three phobias that I suffer from in life. One is claustrophobia. I can't stand close places. The second is acrophobia or a fear of heights.
The last and the strongest phobia, is necrophobia, the fear of dead bodies.
When my grandparents died, they couldn't drag me into the same room as the viewing. Well, she didn't say I had to go in.
************
I pulled into Maxwell's lot around five. I parked and walked around the back. I found the door marked 'deliveries' and knocked.
"Coming!" The door opened and there stood Gabby. She was a plain looking girl, but, she had the best body and gray eyes ever put on two feet. "Hi, Boy Scout!" she said, wrapping her arms around my neck and meeting my lips with hers.