I spot Emma leaning against the brick wall outside the Forest Hills station, her short brown hair swaying gently in autumn the breeze. She sees me and waves, her face lighting up with a nervous smile. Just the sight of her gets my dick twitching, man. I've lusted for her since the day I laid eyes on her.
Fuckin' A, Gabs, I tell myself, You're gonna be pounding that sweet thing soon.
One filthy thought leads to another. I feel a jolt in my chest, or should I say my dick - a mix of excitement and anxiety. My pornographic mind immediately goes to the gutter. I imagine us getting in the back seat of her shitbox Toyota, her hiking up her skirt, straddling me, her lips on mine, her body grinding against me. I can almost feel her heat, hear her moans, taste her sweat.
"Hey, Gabs!" Emma calls out as I approach. Her voice is fast and energetic, like she's been practicing what to say.
"Hi, Emma," I reply, my voice barely above a mumble. I can feel my face turning red, the images in my head refusing to fade.
We start walking to her car, parked a few steps away. "So, um, Gabs, I have a confession to make," she says nervously.
"Oh, yeah? What's that?"
"Wellll..." She draws the word out. "When I asked you about doing this, I didn't tell you everything. I mean, I wasn't totally honest with you."
Oh, boy. Hear we go, I say to myself. Here's the catch. I should have known that this was too good to be true. She's gonna' try to pawn Amway off on me, or some fuckin' shit like that.
"You see, um..., what I didn't mention is... this was Pete's idea," she says, her words tumbling out. "He, uh..., he thinks you're cute."
"So, um, let me get this straight. By cute, are you talking, like, ah...," I try to think of how to put it, but then Emma just blurts it out.
"He wants to have sex with you, Gabs. He wants to fuck you!" she hissed, every syllable a venomous dart. I ain't the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree, but even I could see the fire in her eyes, the way her jaw was clenched. This wasn't no casual observation; this was a goddamn explosion waitin' to happen.
"Oh...,ah..., I see," I pause, not wanting to seem too eager. "Yeah, sure, Emma. I like Pete. I'm OK with it," I say, just matter of fact like.
Meanwhile, in my effin' head, Bingo! hallelujah! Praise Jesus! Fuckin' A, Gabs! Fu.. kin'... A!
I stuff my hands in my pockets, trying to act casual. "And what about y-you, Emma? What do you think?" I ask, my heart pounding.
She looks at me, her cheeks flushed. "Gabs, I, uh..., I've had a thing for you since the minute I laid eyes on ya. And Pete, he's... he's interested too. Said he's bisexual, you know, whatever the fuck that is," she spills, her angry voice crackling.
Holy shit, I think, my mind now filled with images of Pete, his strong hands, his mouth on mine, on Emma's, on both of us. I'm suddenly overwhelmed, my anxiety kicking into high gear. Am I really ready for this?
We reach her car, an old, beat-up Toyota, and get in. Emma turns to me, her eyes searching. "You okay with this, Gabs? Really?"
I take a deep breath, trying to be cool. "Yeah, I'm okay. Just... just nervous, I guess," I say, my voice shaking slightly. I lied. I wasn't nervous. Ok, maybe I was a tiny bit. Mostly though, I was friggin' excited.
She smiles, putting her hand on mine, and gives it a quick squeeze. "Thank you, Gabs. For doing this."
As we pull out of the parking lot, Emma's energy fills the car. She's talking a mile a minute, her hands movin' wildly. I'm only half-there, my mind still consumed by the porno movie playing in my head. I imagine Emma, her legs spread, my face buried between her thighs. I imagine Pete, his hard fucking my mouth, his eyes hungry. I imagine all three of us, tangled together, sweaty and breathless.
Jesus, Gabby, you're a fuckin' wreck, man, I think, trying to focus on the conversation.
Emma's voice cuts through my thoughts. "You're quiet, Gabs. What's on your mind?" she asks, glancing at me.
I shift my ass in my seat, trying to hide my bonna', "Just, uh, just thinking about what's g-gonna happen," I admit, my voice barely above a whisper.
Sure, I was thinking about it, but not in a normal way, but in my perverted way. Fact was, I had thought about her a lot in "that way" this summer, when we spent al those hot days at the beach, or hold up in their place, wearing next to nothing. While every one else was working, we were both unemployed, so we passed the days together, doin' nothin'. Fuck, if I had a nickel for every time I cummed in the shower thinking about her.
Emma laughs, a sound that's both nervous and excited. "Yeah, me too. But let's try to relax, Gabs, okay? Let's just see where the night takes us." She puts her hand on mine again, giving it a long squeeze, then resting it there. Her little hand is just inches from my dick.
Do you see now? Do you get it? That's the way I was. Everything revolved around my cock, my hunger for sex, my need to get off.
I nod, taking a deep breath. Yeah, Gabs, just relax. Enjoy the ride. And with that, I push my anxieties aside, ready to embrace whatever the night has in store. I just stare out the window and go to my pornographic fantasy land... again.
Before I new it, we were at their place in Canton. This was my first time here. Her car crunched up a short dirt driveway, and their home came into view. It's small, tucked neatly into the woods like a secret. The late afternoon sun filtered through the trees, casting dappled shadows on the worn path leading to the front porch. The house has this cozy, intimate vibe, like it's been waiting all day for company. I can already imagine the three of us crammed inside, naked bodies pressed tight, breaths mingling.